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Instead, it brings me dread and nerves.

Discovering that Anthony is going to be my future husband doesn't ease my fears or concerns at all.

Part of me is furious that the man I spent an amazing night with turned out to be someone I would never have slept with if I had known exactly who he was.

I know he never expected to see me again.

Hell, I never expected to see him after that night, so I understand why he didn't share everything with me.

The man is next in line for the mafia throne, of course he isn't going to tell a complete stranger about it.

Despite the logical and rational side of my brain screaming at me, I feel betrayed.

It's stupid because how can I be betrayed by a complete stranger, but the feeling is there all the same.

In the grand scheme of things, being with Anthony might not be the worst possible outcome.

I've already had sex with him and I'm attracted to him.

I won't deny myself that truth.

We've come to an agreement that works best for both of us.

He doesn't seem to want this any more than I do, and that is my only saving grace.

I just have to get through this first, and isn't that a sad fact.

My wedding day, possibly the only one I will ever have, and I have to grin and bear it.

I have to put on a fake smile and just count down the hours until I can get out of this dress and be alone.

This isn't what a wedding day is supposed to be like, but there's no point in getting too upset over it.

Today is going to happen regardless of my feelings, so I might as well not ruin my makeup.

It would have been better if I had at least had a say in some of the planning.

Hell, even my bridesmaids are Anthony's cousins whom I met for two minutes last night.

None of them are friendly, and I can tell they're jealous of me.

I know it isn't because they want Anthony; it has everything to do with Anthony taking another step towards being in a position to take over one day.

Apparently, they feel like they stand a chance at marrying one of the higher-ranking men who would be next in line for the throne if Anthony failed.

It seems that I have been dropped into a sea of politics, and no one bothered to give me a fucking paddle.

Letting out a sigh, I look at the reflection staring back at me.

At least I was able to pick my own dress, so I will be able to feel comfortable and confident today.

That doesn't change the fact that every fiber of my being is screaming at me to run away.

I wish that was an option for me, but it just isn't.

"Come on, suck it up, girl," I tell my reflection.

I didn't get to where I am by complaining or allowing my emotions to get the better of me.

Source: www.allfreenovel.com