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“I’ll be there,” I say with more confidence than I feel.
“Okay, beautiful. I look forward to it.”
We end the call and I glance at my guitar. I think of calling Bree, and maybe I should. But I don’t want to burden her with my inner turmoil. And I sure as hell don’t want to admit what’s happened between Hawk and me.
No, this is something I need to do on my own and for myself. Life is filled with chances, and if you don’t take them while you can, you’ll live to regret the what-ifs. I learned the hard way many years ago when I broke my own heart because I ran scared. I won’t ever run from anything I want again. It’s time I fight for myself and my dreams. I may have lost one of them, but I still have my music.
If I’ve learned anything from my mistakes, it’s you have to seize each moment without fear. From now on, that’s what I’ll be doing. Dreams can fade and disappear if you don’t fight for them…and the fight is what I’ll be living for.
Ithought about her all day. Being with her like I was last night can become an addiction quickly. I can’t let it happen. Our time passed a long time ago. And even if I know she didn’t break her promise regarding her virginity back then; something still happened the night she ran out on me and then I found her wrapped in nothing but a towel withhim.I’m sure my note did its job of making her hate me. It’s probably for the best. Even if the physical stuff between us is off the charts, the disconnect is in the emotions. Our past is too tainted.
When I’m about to leave Valley B, Tate walks in the stable. “You done for the day?”
“Yeah, man. Just putting a few things away before I call it a night,” I answer.
He leans against the door and watches me. “You’ve been extra quiet today. Something wrong?”
I finish putting my wire cutters and gloves up and turn to face him as I wipe my hands on a towel I keep beside the workspace in here. “Nope. I’m good.”
He smirks. “You’re so full of shit. You were there for me when Lucy and I were going through all our stuff last year. You know I’ll listen. I know how private you are. But friends can lean on each other.”
I run a hand through my hair. He’s right. And truthfully, he’s the one person aside from my mom and sister I’ve confided much of anything to. “I don’t know, man. I took an unexpected trip down memory lane. It’s rocking the boat a little more than it should. But I’m good. It’s all good.”
He takes a seat on the stool by the workbench. “I’m listening,” he says, clearly intrigued.
I cross my arms. “There’s nothing much to tell.”
He laughs. “I have eyes and ears. I know you’ve chatted a certain bartender up several times. And whether you admit it or not, I know you have some kind of history with her. You keep us all guessing what it truly is, so I can only assume this is about her.”
I guffaw. “You know what assuming does, right?”
He stares at me in amusement. His eyes crinkle at the corners because of how big he’s smiling right now. “It only makes an ass out of both of us if I’m wrong. But I’m not, am I?”
I shake my head and grit my teeth. “Leave it be, Tate.”
He stands and raises his hands in surrender. “Suit yourself. When you feel like talking, I’m here. We all need someone, Hawk.”
I nod. He’s getting too close to what’s truly going on in my head.
“Feel like going to High Road? Drinks on me. Lucy wanted a night with Ivie since Sterling is working late on this arson case, and they’ve convinced Bree to go too. It’s going to be the girls and Rocky,” he says.
I cringe inside as I think about the investigation. I pray they catch the man who wreaked so much havoc on this little town soon. Then I ask, “They’re stealing your dog, man?”
He laughs. “Yeah. Rocky fell for Lucy about as hard as I did. She’s definitely his favorite person. And she bonded with him when she first stayed with me. He usually goes where she goes.”
I laugh this time. “Man, you’re so whipped. Your woman has you wrapped around her little finger.”
I walk toward my truck with him. He’s sporting a shit-eating grin. “I know it and I’m not afraid to admit it. I love my woman. She came into my life at the perfect moment and barreled her way into my heart. I wouldn’t change a thing.”
“I’m happy for you. But I’ve done what I thought could be love, twice. Both times I was played for a fool. Not a mistake I plan on repeating anytime soon,” I confess.
“Hmm. Right. Well, I can’t give you any real advice because you won’t let me in on what happened, but sometimes you have to fight for the ones you love. Did you? Or did you simply give up and walk away?” he asks like he’s some damn fortune cookie.
We get in my truck and head toward High Road Bar and I hope the certain bartender he mentioned earlier won’t be too bitter when I see her. We ride in comfortable silence, and I wonder…is Tate right? Should I have fought for Brittney? I know I shouldn’t have fought for the girl I tried to fight for. But the thought occurs to me, maybe I fought for the wrong woman when I still had an interest in fighting for love.
I guess I won’t ever know. I’m still deep in thought when we sit at the bar. But I quickly notice it’s only Zander and Gabby tonight. An uneasy feeling settles in my gut like lead. Zander keeps his distance as Tate waves at some other patrons. When Gabby comes to take our orders, I can’t help but ask, “Where’s Brittney tonight?”
She shrugs her slim shoulders. “I don’t know. Zander said something about her calling out tonight to go to Nashville. Some record label guy at a club maybe?”
