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“I’m heading to the balcony. Want to join me, while they duke it out? I don’t want to be responsible if Ocean makes him cry?”
I glance at Conrad and see nothing but warmth and humor in his whiskey-colored eyes. When in Rome, right? I nod and hop off my stool. I give Ocean’s arm a squeeze and she playfully sticks her tongue out at me. “Traitor!” she calls and we all laugh.
The air on the balcony is a refreshing change to the body heat inside. A few other people are also outside, so we aren’t alone. I’m thankful because I don’t want to come off as awkward around a guy who probably has millions of girls fawning over him. Conrad leads me over to a small group, and suddenly, I’m introduced to the other members of Rise Above and one of the musicians that plays back up for all performers. They’re nice. They feel like a family.
“Uh, oh,” one of the guys mumbles and glances at me suddenly, but I already know who just arrived. I could feel it the minute the balcony door opened. Electric energy zipped over my flesh and I knew I was being watched, preyed upon.
“That's my cue,” I joke and leave the group, making my way to Onyx. “Didn’t think you were the party type?” I say once I’m closer, trying not to draw attention.
His thick, black brow lifts and those haunting black eyes trail over me. “I was going to say the same to you.”
I shrug and try to act like it's not a big deal and that I wasn’t freaking out earlier before the alcohol soothed my system. “Stripping for bachelor parties will do that to you.”
Onyx’s face falls and his eyes light with anger. My body responds, wanting to fight with him. He can’t be mad. I did what I had to do when everyone left me.
“Is that your plan here tonight? Is that why you’re so comfortable? Let me know, I’ll find a table that's sturdy.” His eyes gleam with malice and lust.
I can feel the anger swallowing me whole. “You have no right to shade what I did with my life to stay safe. You keep forgetting that you left.”
“Well, you replaced me pretty fast and quite easily. I find it hard to believe me being gone had anything to do with what you chose to do.”
“I moved on?” My eyes widen. Flames lick my cheeks.
“I left and you moved on to Corey.”
“You know what he did to me, you actually think I was willingly dating him?” I scoff and move to walk past him. I’m done with this conversation and completely done with Onyx.
“Did you or didn’t you? I want to hear it from you. It's been three years and I still don’t know the whole story. I showed up after your text and I saw what he did. But until then I had been hearing differently. I want the words from you.” Onyx’s voice tugs me back. I hate that I actually stop and am listening. My heart cracks again, thinking back to that time. A place I never wanted to be in and one I promised myself would never have power over me again.
I turn to face him, not caring that tears shimmer in my eyes. I don’t want a crowd though. This is between us. I can’t wreck their family moment. I take the few steps back to him until we’re toe-to-toe. My head tilts back and my green eyes search his dark ones. “I never moved on with anyone, Onyx. Corey was all I had left and to stop the pain, I made sure I was never alone and always busy. So yes, a lot of my time went to him but that's it. What about you? Did you move on? Did you replace me so easily that it was easier to leave me? Nothing about you is the same either. Your show is a wreck and your music is cookie cutter at best. I don’t think I have anything to explain. You do.”
I jab my finger into his chest and ignore the way it tingles from touching him. Onyx’s eyes blaze into mine. He reaches for me, but I step back before he can touch me. I escape the balcony and forgo the party altogether. I jump in the elevator and ride up to the penthouse, where I lock myself in my room. I wait and I wait, hoping he doesn’t come after me. I can’t face it all right now. I need time to process and to change my perspective. Ocean’s words from earlier hang over me. She’s good at seeing broken hearts. She meant mine and Onyx’s. All this time, if he really believed I moved on, was that why he stayed away? But why stay away when he already broke my heart before he left?
ChapterTwenty-Five
Jade
I’m avoiding Onyx. After our talk, or whatever it was on the balcony, my nightmares are back. My mind is trapped in the events of high school all over again; only this time, Onyx is watching, but he can’t hear my screams for help. I wake up shaking, sweating, feeling the phantom pain on my sides and on my face, my heart hurting from the broken trust. It’s all there.
I don’t blame Onyx, but I can’t be around him. I’m worried enough every time I wake up that the whole penthouse hears me, but so far, I’ve been lucky. I start my morning this way and just head in for rehearsal. I run my body ragged in training and practice so that I fall asleep immediately after eating in the evenings. It’s not the healthiest cycle, but it’s been working. The traveling has helped too. With the music tour underway, the schedule is packed with practices. I can’t even remember what state I’m in most days or which city. I just return to the hotel, which is now my gilded cage for the next two years.
The best thing that has happened in this whole mess is Ocean. For one weekend, we were able to share a space because the guys’ room had a broken pipe and they ended up having to stay in Onyx’s penthouse. I was leery of getting to know anyone. My track record with friends is not stellar. Ocean wouldn’t take no for an answer. She also wasn’t letting Mia get away without making her our friend too.
Ocean had been right, and Mia’s love life has taken a huge turn. I saw Zander Knight only once, but the way he looked at Mia made even my knees knock. I learned even more that Ocean has her own drama going on. And for how many times a day I see her decline a call from Ezra Hamilton, I know he isn’t calling to try and get her on his client roster. It’s personal. Ocean isn’t ready to talk about it yet though, and I won’t push her. We all have our secrets and our pasts. And some of those hidden mysteries threaten to pop up every day.
Even though Onyx and I haven’t been alone together since our fight on the balcony and I’ve been great about avoiding him, he still has managed to intervene in every part of my life. If it's a mealtime, food shows up for me. Every place I go, I have my own security, a vehicle to take me somewhere, and I’m forced to leave the studio by ten. Even though my body is exhausted, it's the principle of the idea that he set up a curfew for me. I know it's his doing because when I asked Amelia if it was in my contract, she was surprised. Between her and Ocean, I couldn’t tell whose eyebrows raised higher. He’s controlling and taking over my life.
“Jade.” Narissa’s voice yanks me out of my head. I turn to find her staring at me with her hands on her hips.
“Yeah?”
“Are you planning to join us today or is daydreaming in your head more exciting?”
What a bitch. I fight the urge to roll my eyes and instead walk over to where everyone else has started to gather. I may have a lot on my mind, but I know what we’re doing. Narissa openly smirks before dismissing me with her eyes.
“The Kid will be down here today at some point to see what we have ready for the concert next month. I want you all to be on your A game today.” She glances back at me. “Not spaced out and dropping the ball.”
I give her a tight smile and nod my head. Even if I was sick, I would be dancing better than half the girls in here. I don’t know what I did to piss off Narissa, but it always feels like she’s slighting me. The group starts to disperse and I make my way over to my bag to grab more tape for my toes.
