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What? No! I was not even considering this!
“This is insane,” I muttered. “I don’t know you. You don’t know me. We’d be divorced before the end of the first week.”
“Don’t believe in divorce. Besides, it’s against club rules.”
“What? Divorce?”
“Yep. ‘Cause a man confides in his woman. Always happens. A woman gets mad at her man and leaves, she tells someone about her experiences. Good or bad. Private or not. Club secrets get spilled that way and puts us all in danger. So. No divorces.”
“And if you abuse me? Hurt me? Degrade me?”
“You go directly to Sting, Brick, or Roman, or their old ladies. They’ll take care of me properly.”
“What does that mean?” My breath caught in my throat and I put a hand around my neck defensively.
“It means, any man in this club hurtin’ a woman -- any woman, but especially his own woman -- is severely punished. If it can’t be proven or if there is any doubt about what happened, you’d be given to someone else. Most likely to someone in a different chapter away from here. If not, if they believe I hurt you, I’d be dealt with.” He held my gaze steadily. “Permanently.”
I stood, pacing across the room, agitated but intrigued. And puzzled. “Why would you ever take a woman?”
“In this case, I’m doing it to keep you safe and trusting I can bring myself to be the man you need. I’ll be a strong protector.”
“You don’t know me. All you know is that I might be some sort of spy for a known kingpin. Why would you put yourself in this position?”
“Honestly?” When I nodded, he continued. “I don’t know. I’m not what you need, but I want to be. I don’t know how else to put it other than that. Why?” He shrugged. “No clue. Only that I feel it in my gut. Have since I caught you in my arms outside the gate. You tellin’ me you don’t feel it too? Because I won’t believe you. Not after the way you turned to me for protection and the way you let me take care of you when my club got to be too much.”
“Look. I’ll admit I seem to have latched on to you. Logically, I know it all started at the gate. You were my salvation, though I know you could have just as easily been my damnation.”
“Never, Nyla. I’m not a good man. I’ve killed both for my country and my club. I’ll continue to do so. But I’ll protect you with my last breath. That means I have to kill a thousand men, that’s what I’ll do.”
“I can’t promise you I’ll ever get to a point where I’ll want sex. Not for a long while. So you better think carefully about this. Don’t get yourself into a situation where you hurt us both.”
He stepped close to me. Not getting in my personal space, but close enough I could smell the clean, fresh scent of his T-shirt and the distinctly masculine smell unique to Eagle. “Nyla, I can’t explain why I need to be with you, I just do. There’s something about you that… settles something inside me. I’m always at war with my memories and the present. When I’m around you, when I look at you even when you’re not next to me, I feel a peace I haven’t known since I was a kid.”
“You’ve only been around me a few hours.”
“And it’s the only few hours in years I’ve not felt the urge to run away from everyone and everything and just be alone.”
“You don’t strike me as the type of man to run away from things. You fight.”
Eagle nodded. “Usually. I just came off run with a club the Tzars have a loose alliance with. We help them out. They help us. I helped them take out a bunch of pedophiles. I’m not convinced Milo Hutch wasn’t part of the ring we took down. I’m also not convinced that Grim Road isn’t on to him. In fact, the man you mentioned you overheard talking to Milo is very likely part of that club. That’s something Wylde is trying to nail down.” He took one more step toward me.
This time, he was in my personal space, but I wasn’t alarmed. I didn’t feel trapped or cornered in any way. In fact, I slowly reached out and placed my hand on his chest. I could feel the breath moving through his lungs, his heart beating beneath my palm. The heat of him surrounded me, and for the first time in my life, I felt a connection with another person. As I gazed up into his eyes, I knew he felt it too. He didn’t trap my hand against his body or pull me into his arms. Just gazed down at me, letting me feel the same thing he felt.
