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“Alex,” he murmured quietly. “You should call me Alex. We are married. You would not call me by my last name, especially not my real one.” and he gave her a lopsided, teasing grin.
“Okay,” Lauren sighed. “You’re right.”
“Are you happy with the rings I chose?”
Now, he was serious. Lauren saw concern in Alex’s eyes, as if he honestly cared about the rings. “I like them very much,” and she moved her left hand, noticing the luminescence of the pearl. “Is it a real one?”
“Yes. I told the woman who runs supply that I wanted a real ocean pearl, not a fresh water type. You deserve fine things, not cheap counterfeits.”
Lauren could almost hear the pride in his voice and the corner of her mouth lifted slightly. “I guess I never expected that from you.” It was tough not to call him Kazak. In the military, a person’s last name became the only name that everyone knew them by. That, or a nickname. She watched Alex puff out his chest a little, happiness shining in his eyes. He was so readable.Open.Lauren envied him that.
“I think it’s amazing you chose a pearl for me,” she admitted, still reeling from that intuitive choice he’d made. Operators were often highly attuned to their partner, but she’d never expected that from Alex. Not with the all battles between them since they’d known one another.
“It felt right,” he told her seriously, looking at her rich, thick red hair piled carelessly upon her head. Lauren was elegant, yet he saw the girl in her, too. Perhaps the little girl trapped inside her was really a wild steppe pony? He hoped one day to find out because Lauren was always so serious. He’d never seen her play; be goofy or funny as other Shield employees were with one another from time to time. Always serious. Never smiling. What he’d give to see that luscious mouth of hers lift into a genuine smile. He’d probably, as went the American slang he’d picked up from Cal earlier, “die and go to heaven”. Alex grinned and spread out his long legs, appreciating First Class flying. A man of his height needed a big seat with a lot of leg-room.
Lauren closed her eyes, suddenly very tired. The day had been grueling from an emotional point of view for her. She leaned her cheek against the plush seat, facing Alex. There was a sense of safety that embraced her. Nothing jolting, just an invisible warmth, as if he were holding her, as if she were fragile, in his large, strong arms. And that was the last thought she had, spiraling into much-needed sleep. Because sleep rarely came to her. The night was not her friend.
Alex felt his heart opening as Lauren slept and her head slowly found a resting place against his wide, broad shoulder. She was so close and he turned, inhaling her wonderful fragrance. Some strands of her hair tickled his jaw. How badly he wanted to lift his arm and embrace her, draw her close to him. Keep her safe. Lauren was incredibly stunning as she slept. Gone was all the tension she normally held on her face. Her red lashes were long and thick against her cheeks… those full lips of hers, slightly parted.
She moved, tucking her knees beneath her, cuddling more securely into the side of his seat and large body, her hands resting in her lap, more like a child. In some ways, Alex sensed Lauren had never been a child. Somewhere, somehow, she hadn’t been given the gift of being allowed to be one. He found himself aching to give her that experience of becoming a child once again, even though she was now an adult. Alex knew how to be a child inside as well, and he would be good for her. He knew he could draw that wild steppe pony child of hers, out to play.
But she was barely civil to him, and Alex constantly reminded himself that she was an actress playing a part with him right now. Gone was the snarly Lauren. Alex reeled internally because the change in her was that dramatic. But it was all for show. When he’d slipped his hand into hers, he’d felt her tense for a second and then, she relaxed. But her hand had remained damp and cool as he’d held it, telling him she didn’t want to be touched by him at all. If only… and Alex turned once more, studying her, absorbing the velvet of her skin, the soft pink across her cheeks, all natural.
Everything about Lauren was real. What you saw was what you got. She had resisted make-up. He liked the way her thick red hair twisted upward to show off her slender neck. He found himself wanting to kiss the sensitive nape. Alex knew she was ice on the outside and red-hot lava inside. He’d met military women like her before, who’d all had very cool exteriors. There had been a number of them over the years and he’d found out just how hot they ran under the hood. All of them had been like a blooded thoroughbred. Lauren would be no different, his experience told him.
Alex saw the orchid was being crushed by the way Lauren had leaned into him as she slept. Gently, he coaxed the two trapped petals from beneath the fabric with his fingers, releasing them. A sudden thought hit him and he wondered if Lauren had been crushed in her childhood as well. Now, he wished Cal or Sky had known more about her past. Because Alex sensed strongly that it was the key to Lauren.
“Malen ‘kaya,” Alexwhispered near Lauren’s delicate ear. It was a Ukrainian endearment that meant “little one”. It was reserved for a man who loved his woman, his child or his baby. “Lauren?” he rasped, his voice a little more insistent.
“Mmmmph…,” and Lauren moved, her lashes barely lifting. In her drowsy state, she was completely vulnerable. She felt Alex so very close to her, his lips inches from her ear. She felt his moist breath flow across her brow. She realized she had tucked her legs beneath her, leaning into Alex’s body, his shoulder a pillow for her head. Lauren suddenly snapped wide awake. She jerked away; Alex too close. Too tempting. Blinking, she uncurled her legs, her heart skittering. But it wasn’t from fear. Alex had felt good to her. She had felt safe. That was a laugh, Lauren thought drowsily, her fingers moving to her hair, making sure it was still in place.
“You were about to fall out of your chair and onto me,” he told her, watching how fetching she looked while waking up. Her black pupils were huge, the crescents of gray pushed to the outer rims of her irises, her lower lip soft, kissable, and so available. All he had to do was lean forward and he could easily curve his mouth in upon hers. Several tendrils of her hair stuck to her cheek and, without thinking, Alex gently grazed her flesh, brushing them aside. For a moment, Lauren froze. And then, she relaxed as she straightened her wrinkled pant suit and tried to wake up.
“Oh,” she muttered, pulling her seatbelt tighter, “I dropped off the face of the Earth.” What must Kazak think of her now? The way she’d fallen asleep and leaned on him like the big teddy-bear pillow he was? Why couldn’t she have leaned the other way, using a pillow against the bulkhead instead?
“You slept long and deep. I am sorry I had to wake you. I did not want you falling off your seat,” Alex told her, watching her fuss with her clothes. Her fingers had a lot of white and pink scars all around them and they were so long, her nails cut short. No sniper had long, polished fingernails, that was for sure. Still, her long hands were graceful and Alex found himself wondering what her fingertips trailing across his flesh would feel like. Frowning, he had to get his mind out of the ditch. Disconcerted, Lauren was more of a distraction that he’d first realized. Much more than what was allowed. Alex swallowed and forced himself to stop responding to Lauren on such a level. It could get them killed in the wrong circumstance.
By the time she awakened, Lauren felt calmer. More centered. She wasn’t sure if it was Alex’s nearness or not. Something had changed remarkably between them. Had it been her? It had to be, because Alex was his same-old self.
“You are very tired,” he noted. They sat in a two-seat row and he was glad they had no one else nearby.
“Yeah,” she grumped, “I don’t know what happened. I was down for the count.”
His eyebrows drew down as he studied her. “You do not sleep well at night?” She almost always had slight smudges beneath her eyes when Alex would see her in the morning at Shield HQ.
Shrugging, Lauren muttered, “I don’t like the dark. The night.”
He smiled a little. “How do you operate as a sniper, then?”
“Oh, that.” She made a face. “That’s not a problem. I’m focused. I have a target. Everything in me is honed like a laser on my tango.”
“Then? Between ops? When you are at home in your apartment? You do not sleep well?”
Needled by his continued interest, Lauren scowled. She refused to look at Alex because, when she did, she went all sort of mushy inwardly, feeling longing for him. And it wasn’t lost on her at all that women were extremely interested in Alex. He was a tall, damned ruggedly good-looking man. And yes, he was eye candy. Worse, she was affected by him, too. “I just… sometimes… don’t sleep. I toss and turn. I’m restless.”
“Nightmares? PTSD?”
Wincing a little, Lauren heard the sudden gentleness in his low voice, felt his gaze upon her. Damned if she didn’t feel like he really cared about her. It was part of the act, she told herself. Mouth quirking, she said, “Yes, I get nightmares.” But not what he thought they were about. And she wasn’t going there with Alex. Not ever. She flexed her fingers, feeling nervous for no reason. The flight was not full. There were no other people right near them and that was good.
