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Working with computers, my effort is all internally driven, and I feel as though I’m on top of the world several times a day when I master some new programming challenge.
I’ve always kept to myself. When we were in cages, it was because we were punished for fraternizing with other splicers. Even when we were at Area 51, I didn’t make many friends. Most of the males are predator species. Being spliced with mostly equine genes qualifies me as prey.
I never, not for a moment, worried that any of the males would eat or attack me. I’ve trained with them all my life. With my height advantage, I’ve bested most of them in one-on-one skirmishes just as often as they bested me. I never felt at ease enough to fully let my guard down with them. I never felt at ease enough to fully let my guard down with them
Being free to roam the acreage and set my own schedule, at least to some extent, has given me more confidence. I’ve joined a few poker games in the males’ lounge with not only splicers, but some of the soldiers. For the first time in my life, I feel as though I belong somewhere.
Of course, when I’m with Jo I expose even more of myself. I believe she truly wants to get to know me, so I share not only my thoughts and feelings, but my hopes and dreams.
For the first time in my life, my dreams include a future that is more than just getting by. I can actually imagine thriving.
As much as I think about a future that includes Jo, I spend an equal amount of time cautioning myself, bringing my thoughts back to reality. Jo is here on a contract. She’s hinted that she was in some kind of trouble on the outside and that she was lucky Slater brought her here. She frequently mentions how many months it will be until she’s released from her obligation.
Sadly, it’s clear to me she has no intention of remaining here after the military allows her to walk out the front gate.
It feels as though I’m constantly walking a tightrope between dreaming of a future with Jo, and imagining the day she’ll jump up, kiss my cheek, and wave goodbye.
It’s no use trying to keep my emotions in check, though. As the saying goes, the horse has left the barn. I’ve already fallen in love with her. At least I think it’s love.
It’s one thing to ask Corporal Barton if I’ll ever gain more control over my cock, and quite another to ask about love. Although Colonel Slater has already allowed a few couples to live together in private dwellings behind the dorms, it still seems that species-mixing, as they call it, is frowned upon.
Before I leave for dinner, I shake my head, as if it were easy to shake all those worry-thoughts out of my mind. Even though I’ve been in the office no more than five feet from Jo all day, I can’t wait for dinner when I can be with her again.
Chapter Nineteen
Jo
As I put the last bite of dinner in my mouth, I look around the dining room. I’ve never eaten so fast as I have lately. I want to set my fork down so I can hold hands with Chance. It’s like I’m a schoolgirl again. Because Chance feels the same way, I barely feel embarrassed.
We’ve taken to sitting with the two other established couples. Noble and Jenna, and Ty and Olivia. They have no reservations about giving each other moon-eyed looks. My grandma would have called them twitterpated. That word is so old-fashioned it always cracked me up, but it perfectly describes what I’m seeing across the table.
Chance sets his fork down the same moment as me, as though he’s mirroring my every bite. We keep our gaze on our table companions as we twine our fingers under the high-topped table Slater brought in so it’s easy for Chance to eat with his newfound friends.
“You’re coming tonight, right?” Ty asks, a terrifying smile on his face.
Luckily, I’ve been eating with him for weeks now. I must admit, the first time he graced me with one of his long-fanged smiles, my sphincter puckered. Now that I know him, I’d say he’s one of the nicest males I’ve ever met.
There’s always a smile on his face. He almost never walks; he dances wherever he goes. It makes me so happy that these males, at least the ones I’ve met, are all the lemonade-out-of-lemons sort.
“Coming where?” Chance asks.
“Someone’s been distracted,” Ty teases, his tiger DNA showing as he lets out a happy chuff. “Haven’t you been listening? I’ve been talking about the dance for days.”
A dance. When I was in high school, the prospect of a dance would have gotten my full attention, especially if I had a boyfriend du jour—and I almost always had one of those.
However, the idea of dancing with Chance doesn’t sound very dreamy. The difference in our heights would make it hard to wind up in a dark corner dry humping all night like I did in high school. Besides, there’s the little problem of our let’s-take-it-slow agreement.
When I glance at Chance, the look in his wide, blue eyes tells me he’s as keen on dancing as I am.
“I don’t think—” he says, shaking his head.
“C’mon, Chance. You were part of the Bollywood production a few weeks ago. You sashayed down Main Street with Ty on your back for the big number,” says Jenna.
“That… that wasn’t dancing. That was carrying,” Chance protests.
Everyone but me laughs as though Chance was joking.
Despite our reluctance, after dinner we’re swept away with all our friends into the coed lounge. Nyx the naga and Forest, the fox-guy who peed at Bella’s feet, are set up behind a hastily constructed DJ stand.
