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“Obviously it wasn’t” she hissed, her lungs deflating like ruptured hot air balloons. “I’m not… I tried, Tavish. I tried to get pregnant when I was younger, and it didn’t work. I accepted that maybe I just couldn’t have kids.” She didn’t like bringing up her past with another man, or the fact that she’d tried to have kids with him, because it felt wrong discussing something so private with another person. Insulting and horrible, but he needed to know her body. They’d just accepted their life the way it was. Childless.
Jotham had been relieved, if she was willing to admit it, and now it didn’t feel so hard to be honest with herself. She’d been devastated and she’d gone through that completely alone.
Maybe there were specific things she could point to in her marriage. Things that were said and unsaid. Actions taken and not taken. That were just one step further down the road ofwe want separate things, we just can’t admit it.
“It’s going to be alright.” Tavish’s hand with his beautiful, strong fingers clenched her arm just enough to reassure. He was so gentle and careful with her. “I promise. You’re here. You’re in Greenacre. We’ll help you. You’ll have the best care.”
“How many shifter pregnancies has Josephine looked after? Births? Because I don’t see a lot of women here.”
His face blanked, or rather, it looked he was hiding behind a mask so he didn’t scare her, but then he dropped it and gave a resigned sigh. “Not many, I’ll admit, but she’s a great doctor and she’s had her own twins with Trace as well, so she knows what to expect. Everyone here will pull together. If you need advice, then as well as Lily and Josephine there’s another woman, Glendy, who is actually pregnant right now. She’s about four months along.”
“Good god. What if something terrible happens to—”
He silenced her with a shake of his head and a look so serious she believed he’d stand in the way of it ever becoming a reality, even if that was impossible. “That won’t happen. Not to you. Not to the baby.”
“But we—”
“We’ll find you a place to stay here, only if that’s what you want. If not, then close by, in Seattle. We’ll make this work. You’re not trapped. You’re still free to live your life. This was completely unplanned on both our parts, and we’ll find a way to make this work. I would never use this incredibly happy news to derail your life.”
He sounded unsure only of the part where he said happy. Not for himself, but for her. Her hand flew to her stomach. His was still on her shoulder. She was honest enough with herself to admit that she needed that steadying touch. She even leaned into it.
“I’m happy about the baby. I’m excited. Children are the most wonderful part of life. I thought I couldn’t have kids, that I wouldn’t have them, but here I am. Happy. Nervous. Overjoyed. Terrified. There’s a lot to come. Pregnancy can be hard, painful, scary.”
“It can be all those things, but we’ll be here for you. If you need it, Josephine will find you someone even above her specialty. We have another clan that lives on neighboring land now and they don’t have the problem we have with birthing female shifters. There are plenty of women there who have had children.”
“But they’re not humans, Tavish.”
His face changed, falling. “Well, that’s true, but they’re experienced in shifter pregnancies and birth. I’m sure they’d be willing to offer advice or help if necessary.”
“You don’t look sure.”
“Well, they like to keep to themselves, but I’m sure that if we really needed it, they’d at least give advice.”
“So we’re basically just flying by the seat of our pants?”
“No.” The adamant shake of his head told her what he thought about that. “No risks. No chances. Not for you. Not for myyoung.” He couldn’t keep that straight face any longer, and watching a man as strong and rugged as him absolutely melt made her go liquid inside too.
The door opened behind Tavish and Josephine stepped in. Her face colored immediately on taking in their intimate stance, but they didn’t break apart, embarrassed or fumbling. She looked first at Tavish and then her sharp gaze flew to January. People in Greenacre were incredibly perceptive, but then, it was pretty obvious what would have brought her back and to the clinic with zero notice. Only a medical emergency that she couldn’t go to a regular hospital for in Phoenix.
“Oh,” Josephine whispered, but then she broke into a huge smile. “It’s so wonderful to see you again, January.” There were so many doctors in the world who were amazing at practicing medicine, but terrible at interacting with their patients. Josephine excelled at both. She was great at reading the room, and after just a few seconds, when January allowed herself the smallest smile in the face of all that warmth, Josephine grinned as well. “Congratulations, my dear. How about we all sit down and talk about what the future looks like, at least as far as this baby goes?”
Chapter 16
Tavish
Oddly enough, even after Trace and Josephine offered their spare room and Sam and Lily offered a place with them, January said she’d rather stay with him. He promised her that he’d take the couch. He didn’t want to put even the smallest amount of pressure on her. She was already dealing with so much change. Josephine had suggested she speak with Glendy in the morning, and January took her up on the offer. While Josephine had given her some pointers about what to expect when you’re expecting a shifter baby, her memories had faded with time and the delivery, so she’d thought a meeting with another mom-to-be would be beneficial. She’d arranged it within a few minutes over her phone.
He stirred the pitcher of peach juice slowly, wanting to make sure it was perfect. He finally turned and found January standing behind him, arms crossed and a frown that matched his. No, his were more like concerned lines. Hers was just a glowering, annoyed expression.
“I’m going to be fine, Tavish. You’re only going to be gone for a few hours. I’ve managed to survive this far as an adult. I’m more than capable of being here alone.”
“I know.” He held out the pitcher. “I made you peach juice. I know how much you like it.”
She softened slightly, sighing and dropping her arms. “Thanks.”
“You know I’m going to worry about you endlessly from here on out.”
“I know, but we need to keep it to a minimum. I’m too independent to be coddled and fussed over. I know you’re worried. I’m scared too. I haven’t told my family, not even my sister. There’s still a move in my future, wherever I decide I want to end up. It’s a lot of stress, which isn’t good for anyone, so I’m trying to take it literally minute by minute and relax.”
