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My movements had turned choppy, my breath coming in short gasps as I pumped my fingers in and out of my arse and twisted my wrist, brushing my palm over the sensitive head of my dick. I was hard, so hard, and leaking everywhere. My balls were drawn up high and tight against my body. Brushing my pinky finger over them sent a shudder of sensation through me, my hole tightening around my fingers and strangling them.
I pictured my balls firing off, the swell of sensation and its release through my dick as I neared the edge. One more press on my prostate, my grip tightening on my cock, and I cried out, jerking hard as I painted my hand with cum. Pulse after pulse shot from me as I floated in ecstasy. My fingers and toes tingled, my legs heavy after having had them tense for so long. My breaths heaved, and I slumped back, melting into my chair.
Silence surrounded me, the only noise in the office my heavy breathing. Then, “Tristan? You okay?”
“Ah,” I choked out a cough. “Yes,” I squeaked.
“Sounded like—”
“Sex noises—” Barry helpfully supplied.
A chorus of “Barry!” crackled through the speaker, some of my colleagues scandalized and the others laughing.
“What?” he asked unashamedly. “Sounded like sex noises.”
“No.” I snapped before forcing out a chuckle that sounded as awkward as it was. Who the fuck forgets to turn off their mic then jacks off in the middle of a staff meeting with the whole department listening? But my cover up lie came easily enough. It was one I’d used before. On Flynn and Zali. I closed my eyes, desperate not to relive the moment—getting hard again while I still had cum all over me and my fingers in my arse wasn’t exactly ideal when I couldn’t mute the damn mic before I needed to jack off again. “Not sex noises. I twisted in my seat and pinched a muscle in my back. I’ve been stretching to try to loosen it up.”
“Yes, well. Let’s try to keep focussed,” Professor Redden scolded in his prim-and-proper voice.
I went back to ignoring them as I wiped my hands with some tissues before muting my mic, cleaning up as best I could without actually leaving my office. I groaned and rested my head against my crossed arms on the desk. I was in trouble.
I wanted them, but what was I supposed to do? How could I risk everything? Zali was dangerous. She wasn’t an employee of the federal police when she was working on my assignment. She wasn’t performing investigative work in that role. She didn’t have the protection—as limited as it was where there was no warrant in place—that the police did. That meant neither did I.
She was breaking laws left, right, and centre, not seeming to blink an eye when she did.
Zali’s danger came from her power to destroy me. A wave of those magical fingers on her keyboard, the download of a file or the slip into a secure server, andbam—everything I’d worked for would be up in smoke.
But it wasn’t just my career. It was my freedom.
I could live with walking away from my job. I could find something else to do easily enough. I wasn’t one of those academics who’d be a lifer. I had no intention of still being there when I was sixty or seventy.
But ending up in jail again was a hard limit. Do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars. I’d dragged myself out of my childhood—where I might as well have been in jail—and landed square in a crowd of kids who were just as intent on breaking free of their oppressive parents’ hold. They were military brats too.
Being abandoned by the father who’d loved controlling every aspect of my life to that point in time had left me reeling. He’d tossed me away when I’d needed him most. I was apparently a delinquent that he couldn’t change.
It had shocked me into getting myself a free court-appointed lawyer and trying to make up for the shit ton of regret.
Serving time hadn’t been the idea. But doing so had put me on another path, one I reminded myself of every day.
I had become a statistic of youth crime then. I absolutely wasn’t going to become a white-collar criminal now.
Zali and Flynn had to go. I needed them out of my class and out of my life.
That’s all there was to it.
So why did it hurt so much to turn my back and walk away?
I sighed unhappily, the high from only moments ago well and truly fizzled out. Why did I remember Zali’s lips turned up in a shy smile as I’d carried her to the hot tub as she’d cuddled into me? Why did I picture Flynn with his warm eyes and fingers in my hair as we talked after we’d made love? And damnit, we had made love.
Fuck. I’d done it. I’d gone and fallen in love with them.
chapter 21
Zali
T
he sirens grew louder. Flynn curled his hand around my nape, forcing my head down into his lap. I bit back my taunt, knowing he was on the edge. The last thing I wanted to do was fight with him over me making a stupid joke.
