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Jack
Theshootwasoverand Maya had just left. After leaving with Daniel and Becky, I gathered my things at the office and decided I needed to make things right. Maya deserved more than this and definitely deserved some explanation. So, I drove to her house before I could talk myself out of it.
I stood still, fighting the stiffness of my muscles as I contemplated the merits of being here. Was this the right thing to do? Shaking my head. Of course it was.
I knew how I behaved was wrong, but the thought of Daniel being anywhere around Maya still made my blood boil. My reaction was excessive, though, which is why I wasn’t surprised when Maya stopped replying to my texts and picking up my calls.
I took a deep breath before knocking on Maya's door. I needed to apologize for what happened. It wasn't like me to lash out like that, but the mere thought of losing her made me see red. For some reason, I couldn't let her go, not after everything we'd been through, not when she was just making her way into my life again.
She answered the door, looking tired and unresponsive. My heart sank. I'd hoped she'd have calmed down enough to even be around me, but that wasn’t the case.
"Maya," I said softly, afraid to even raise my voice for fear that she would slam the door in my face. "Can I come in? Can we talk?"
She hesitated for a moment, glancing behind her into the house. Her gaze made me nervous, to my surprise, but she just nodded and gestured for me to follow. I followed her into the living room, my heart pounding in my chest. I took a deep breath, trying to calm my nerves, and stood aside while Maya sat down on the couch, avoiding eye contact.
"I'm sorry," I said, the words coming out in a rush. "I shouldn't have reacted like that. I was just annoyed, Maya. I know Daniel’s reputation with women, and I overreacted. I was selfish and didn't take into account that you’re your own person and can take care of yourself. Please…"
She remained silent, her eyes fixed on the floor. My heart sank. This wasn't going well at all. I needed to try something else.
"I brought you these," I said, pulling out the bouquet I had been holding behind me. They were calla lilies, her favorite, and I had to drive all over town before I could even find any florist who had the flowers in stock.
"I know it's not much, but I wanted to show you how sorry I am."
Maya looked up at me, her expression icy and green eyes stormy.
"Are you trying to buy me back, Jack?" she asked, her voice dripping with sarcasm.
My heart sank. That was the last thing I wanted her to think about.
"No, of course not," I said quickly. "I just wanted to show you I care about you."
Maya just looked at me, her expression unreadable, like there was a wall blocking her thoughts and emotions from showing. One thing I was able to pick up though, even with my thick-headed maleness, was that Maya was angry. I felt like I was losing her, and it was killing me. I had to try something else.
"Maya, please," I said, my voice cracking. "I care about you. You know that, right?"
She looked away, her face flushing, and when she looked back at me, her eyes flashed in anger, turning the bright green into a dark, murky green.
"Do you?" she said, her voice low. "Because it seems like you only care about yourself. I’m not a toy, Jack. I’m not your property and you can’t dictate my actions."
I felt like I'd been punched in the gut. Maya had always been the one person who understood me, who saw past my exterior to the real me. And now she was looking at me like I was a stranger.
I guess I was, even to myself. Seven years isn’t seven months after all.
"Maya, I do care about you," I said, my voice softening. "More than anything in the world."
She just looked at me, her eyes cold.
"Then why did you react like that?" she asked. "Why did you assume the worst?"
I felt a knot forming in my stomach.
"I don't know," I said, my voice barely above a whisper. "I guess I was just scared."
"You know, Jack," she said, her voice taking on a passive-aggressive tone, "it's almost like you don't trust me."
I felt my jaw clench as anger bubbled up inside me.
"What are you talking about?" My voice was tight, and my jaw barely moved.
