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“Well, that’s…I mean…” I gesture awkwardly at the toddler, half-asleep on his mom’s shoulder now. “It looks like everything worked out?”
Sheryl smiles at the hopeful lilt to the question.
“It did. Took me a while, but I ended up meeting Tommy at church, and I don’t know. We just clicked.” She gives a casual shrug, the effortlessness of someone utterly in love. “He’s my best friend. I can’t imagine life without him.”
A shadow must fall over my face, because Sheryl suddenly looks worried and apologetic. She reaches out but doesn’t touch my crossed arms.
“Oh, Mel. I’m sorry. I feel like I keep saying the wrong things. Listen, if it didn’t work, it didn’t work, right? I’m sure you made the right choice for you. Not all relationships can last forever.”
I zone out as we go through the motions of promising to keep in touch and finally saying goodbye.
Her words keep echoing in my head.Not all relationships can last forever.
Maybe that’s why this is hitting me so hard. I think a part of me always assumed that Jenson would be there, no matter what, right up to the end. Even those years without him…it felt like I was just…waiting.
And as rough as that first day run-in with him was, maybe a part of me was also relieved to have him back. Even if he is a changed man.
* * *
Jodie only makesa few faces at the groceries as she helps unpack them. I keep a close eye on her, making sure she’s breathing normally and not overdoing it.
“Zucchini?” she asks, making me smile as she holds up the summer squash.
“Yes. Pasta with pesto tonight? That sound okay?”
I don’t wait for an answer, puttering around the little kitchen and pulling out pots and pans. It’s only when I put the cutting board on the countertop that I realize Jodie is watching me closely, her tired eyes narrow, a hand on her hip.
“What?”
“What?” she repeats with a sigh, taking the knife from me. I try to protest, but she starts slicing the zucchini in little disks.
“You can’t keep doing this, Mel.”
My brow furrows. “Making you dinner…?”
“No. Dropping everything to come here.”
I scoff. “Jodie—what? You were in thehospital,in case you forgot.”
“Yes, I was. And I have been before. And Mel—” she turns to face me, her expression deadly serious “—I will be again. Especially if they can’t find me a kidney.”
My heart stutters at her words, and my throat constricts, going all thick and achy. This is a possibility I try not to dwell on, but she’s right. The end might be coming sooner rather than later, even though she’s not even fifty yet.
“I…Jodie. If you need me here, it’s not a problem. My job approved the time off. I can come and help out. If you’d prefer space, I can stay at the motel or—”
Jodie shakes her head, her bun loosening enough for locks to fall around her face. “It’s not that, Mel. You need to live your life.”
My mouth snaps shut.
“I am living my life.”
“Are you?”
She pins me with her gaze, and the kid in me squirms. Jodie was always good at knowing when I was lying, or maybe just not telling the whole truth. When I started crushing hard on Jenson in high school, the same week he officially asked me out, she had it out of me in minutes.
“I know the city isn’t where you want to be, Mel. I know you took that job for the money. And I know you worry about the bills. But they aren’tyoursto worry about. You need to focus on your own life, be happy, create a family.”
My chest feels hollow as I think just how far I am from any of that.
