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I do. I dislike the killer I see in the mirror much of the time. Still, I shrug. “Perhaps the Boy Scout died that day, as well. He didn’t have what it would take to get revenge.”
Sybil considers that, her soft expression melting something in my chest. It’s as if she sees every moment of my last four years but isn’t judging it.
“I’ve thought about revenge, too.”
“I can get it for you.”
She shakes her head. “If I justify my revenge, someone else will justify theirs, and it will come right back to me. It’s a gross cycle. My family has been stuck in it long enough. Losing Angela…” Her voice wavers, and she clears her throat. “Yeah, it fucking hurts. And it would be nice to make Mad Blood hurt, too, because what he did was sick. But if I had to choose between making him and his family suffer or taking my loved ones far away so we could be safe, I’m picking the latter, Nico.”
I absorb her words for a long time. Then I sigh. “Our lives are very different.”
“Tell me about it. That’s the problem.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I see one of her hands touch her stomach, and then she sees me looking and plucks off a bit of lint. Perhaps she has menstrual pain again.
“Angela would have liked this inn, by the way. She was really into old historic buildings before she went all stoner on me in high school.” Then she tips her head. “What was your brother like?”
I look at my hands resting on the steering wheel. I never talk about my older brother. I haven’t said a word about him to anyone since the week he died—since I had to break the news to our family.
But Sybil is watching me with understanding. I don’t need to say much to her. She lost a sister. She knows, even if I don’t use the right words.
“He was a good leader, better than me. Had less of a temper. Johnny took after my father a lot, which is why they called him Big Junior. He…” I shrug. “He was married.”
Her eyebrows go up. “He was?”
I nod, looking away. “I broke the news to his wife. They had no kids. She didn’t know much about what he did. I still don’t know how he kept it a secret from her, but I watched her world fall apart. I know a lot of widows, Sybil. The ones that find out their husbands lied about not being in the mafia…it’s harder on them. It’s always the worst for the ones who don’t know what they’re connected to.”
“So that’s why you told me right away.”
She’s astute. I still remember looking down at her in the downpour and thinking she was the most gorgeous woman I’d ever seen. Dripping wet, with her clothes clinging to every tantalizing curve. She was clearly frightened of me but was all genuine smiles and thank-yous. Sunlight on a rainy day.
I knew what I wanted then: Her. And I wanted Sybil to want me back—the real me, with all my broken background. So, I’d told her exactly who I was and promised I wouldn’t hurt her. I told her I’d protect her, and she could trust me. That I’d be my best self around her.
And she had kissed me—deeply, passionately. Then laughed at my surprise.
And just like that, I was lost.
Pulling myself out of the memory, I nod at the inn. “Maybe we should go in so you can ravage me the same way you did then.”
Sybil’s face goes red. “I did notravageyou. Don’t be dramatic.”
“I was practically an innocent,” I grin, enjoying her growing fluster. “If I had known I was rescuing a sex goddess….”
“Oh, shut up. You knew exactly what you were doing. Just because I wanted to try some new things—"
“I was more than happy to tie you up then, and I’d be happy to right now,” I say, opening the door. “Perhaps they’ll have more wax, too.”
Sybil gasps and tugs on my arm to keep me from stepping out. I chuckle at her panic. She scowls, but the corners of her mouth are trying to push their way up. “You’re sex-obsessed, you know that?” she finally laughs.
I smirk, leaning over to whisper in her ear and enjoying her small shiver. “No. I’m obsessed with thecrudele tesorinawho broke me. How could I not be, Sybil? You’re stronger for being broken and you challenge me at every turn. Everything about you is intoxicating, and I can’t fucking get enough of you.”
She pulls back just enough to examine my face closely, the warm dark pools of her irises consuming me. Her breath is light sweetness against my lips. I nearly say the words.Forget the fucking contract. Just stay with me. Be mine. I need you.
I want everything with her, but I keep myself from saying so. I save that conversation for later, after I end Lorenze Gatto. With the Attolini empire in my hands, I can change things. Make everything safer for her and for our future child—because I promised her four years ago that I’d protect her, and I keep my promises.
Just like I intend to keep Sybil.
I capture her lips with mine.
