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“I can walk next to her in the street or stand behind her in the line at a gas station, and I wouldn’t know. I wouldn’t fucking know,”Austin had murmured against Matty’s shoulder, his voice muffled and vulnerable. Matty had felt his t-shirt getting wet where Austin had his face buried. Matty didn’t know what was worse—that you had a mother who didn’t want you or that you had one who didn’t fight for you. In the end, it didn’t really matter, he guessed. The outcome was the same. They’d both been motherless for most of their lives and that had changed them both. But perhaps it had also brought them together. Perhaps Matty had recognized himself in Austin and that had drawn him to him. The same kind of yearning for a togetherness and a family that made them just right for each other. In any case, something had shifted between them since Austin had told him about his mom. Like a weight being lifted from Austin’s shoulders. He would even joke about it from time to time—that he and Matty both held a membership to the “shitty-parent-club.” Matty would scold him then, saying they were lucky that at least some grown-ups in their lives had stepped up when others had failed so miserably.
“It’s good, Dad. It’s a nice place. Matty’s been doing a real good job with the backyard. Put in a firepit and all. Looks real good.” Austin, who was apparently still a growing boy, had finished off half of his plate before the rest of them had even started. Nodding at Will and Millie who sat across from him and Matty, he continued. “You need to come by and see it soon. It’s real pretty with flower beds and all. Lavenders, Millie.” He winked at Matty before taking a sip of his beer.
Matty couldn’t help blushing at the appraisal and his voice came out throaty.
“It’s just a few sunflowers and some bushes for the insects. No big deal.” No matter how many times people would praise him or tell himgood jobit still came as a surprise every goddamn time. Matty wondered how long it would take before he got used to it.
“I can’t wait to see it. I’m sure it’s wonderful, honey.” Millie clasped her hands together and beamed at Matty as if he’d laid out an entire eighteenth-century English garden in their backyard. She always did that. Looked at him as if he’d hung the fucking moon. He’d always wondered why Will and Millie didn’t have any children of their own, but he’d never wanted to approach the topic. Maybe they couldn’t have any? He doubted that it was for lack of trying because with all the love Millie piled on him daily, it seemed logical that she would’ve wanted some of her own.
“It’s fucking awesome, that’s what it is,” Austin grinned and ruffled Matty’s hair which he’d fruitlessly tried to tame before they’d left the house.
“Austin!” Ray’s deep baritone boomed from his spot at the end of the oak dining table.
“Sorry, sir.” Looking regretfully at Millie and Will, he added solemnly. “Sorry, ma’am. Sir.”
“Nah, I’ve heard worse, young man. Did I ever tell you about that time when I was working up in Alaska when I was around your age? I don’t think I ever did…”
“And you certainly don’t have to,” Millie interrupted, a stern, unmistakable frown between her brows. Will smirked at the boys while he pretended to be afraid of his wife.
“Please don’t hit me, you evil woman. You always hit me,” he grinned, holding his arms up in front of his face in a protective gesture. Matty and Austin burst into laughter at the ridiculous notion that the tiny woman would be able to beat up the giant of a man sitting next to her. Matty had never thought that there’d come a time in his life where he’d be able to joke about an ass whooping or laugh about it over dinner. He felt Austin’s firm hand on his thigh and a quick glance in his direction.
You okay, sweetheart?He mouthed and Matty felt warmth spreading through his chest.This is what family looks and feels like,he thought to himself as he nodded before picking up his fork.
“Actually, there’s something we wanted to talk to you about.” Will spoke softly while he wiped contemplatively at his thick beard, serious, gray eyes fixed on Matty.
“Yeah?” Matty looked at Will, then at Millie, a worried look in his eyes. “What’s up, Will?”
“Well, you see, in a few years I’ll be sixty and I ain’t getting any younger. You know, last week when we were in Biddeford, we went by a lawyer’s office. You know, getting our papers in order and everything…”
Matty looked at Austin, who looked just as puzzled.
“What are you saying, Will? I don’t understand. Are you sick?” A ringing sound had started in his ears, and Matty suddenly felt sick to his stomach.
“No, no, son, it’s nothing like that.” The older man scratched at the back of his neck, looking helplessly at his wife who shook her head at her husband.
“You’re telling it all wrong,” she scolded before directing her attention at Matty. “What Will’s trying to say, hon, is that you’re like a son to us, Matty.” Millie’s voice was steadfast as she continued but the moist veil coating her eyes gave her away. “These past three years with you in our lives, as part of our family… We’ve never been happier.” She looked briefly at her husband who, too, was tearing up. Then she nodded, mostly to herself. “Will and I were never able to have any children of our own, Matty. It just wasn’t in the cards. That’s just how it goes sometimes. Some people pray for a child all their lives without getting one—others fail to appreciate the gift which the good Lord has bestowed upon them.” Reaching for her husband’s hand, she shrugged her delicate shoulders. “Will and I have had a full and happy life together. No question about that. But you were the missing puzzle piece all along, hon.”
Squeezing his wife’s hand Will took a big gulp of his drink before picking up where his wife had left off.
“So… that’s why we went to Biddeford, you see. We want to make sure that you’ll never lack for anything ever again and…” Raising a finger at Austin who was about to interrupt, Will continued “…and that doesn’t mean that you youngsters can’t provide for yourselves. You’re doing just fine. In fact, you’re doing great. It just means that in case you need it, you’ve got it. I mean…”
Matty looked confused at the older couple who’d taken him in to their home and later their hearts three years ago. Or maybe it was the other way around. Then his eyes searched Austin’s who in return looked at his dad.
“What he means,” Millie took over “is that we’re leaving everything to you, hon. You and Austin. It’s been settled and we don’t ever have to talk about it again. But now you know.” Millie rose from her seat and went to the other side of the table, wrapping her thin, yet strong arms around a stunned Matty.
Still not quite understanding what had just happened, he breathed in the lavender scent of her soft cotton dress, waiting for his heart to quiet down in his chest. Millie continued to press soft kisses to the top of his head, while she sniffed and mumbled endearments affectionately.
Ray stood from his chair and moved towards the liquor cabinet in the corner of the dining room.
“We need something stronger, I think,” he mumbled to no one in particular. Will nodded in agreement, brushing at his eyes. A sigh of relief escaped Matty’s lips as he tangled the fingers of his right hand through Austin’s. Squeezing back, Austin cleared his throat.
“So, since no one’s dying anytime soon, could someone pass me the potatoes?” He winked at Matty, squeezing his hand. “I’m pretty much starving here.”
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
Avery – Now
“ARE YOU CRYING,Avery? Are you messing up daddy’s sheets with your disgusting snot and pathetic tears?”
