Page 63 of Cruel Promise


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It took mere minutes for him to twist my simple request into a fight that turned into a pathetic, one-way confessional. I cringe when I think about the things I’d admitted to him.

I miss you.

I just want to be near you.

I could freaking kick myself. How many times do I have to remind myself that he wants nothing to do with me?

No, that’s not quite true. Hedoeswant something to do with me—when it involves my body. He’s perfectly happy to fuck me silly. But he doesn’t want totalkto me. He doesn’t want tobewith me. He called me his dirty little whore and, idiot that I am, I agreed.

Honestly, I deserve to have my feminist card revoked.

I storm out of his office like I should have done long before he pinned me to his desk and trapped me with those iron arms. I stomp through the house like a woman on a mission. The maids jump to the side the moment they see me. Little do they know, I’m the woman who’slostthe whole damn mission.

Lost the plot, too, at this point.

Idiot.

Bad guardian.

Bad mother.

Bad person.

Idiot. Whore. Idiot.

When I get back to the east wing of the house, I hear the children’s voices coming from the kitchen. I groan internally. My head is already pounding and those voices are nothing if not keyed-up right now.

The girls are running circles around the kitchen island while the chef maneuvers out of the way. Josh is curled up in the breakfast nook with a book in his lap.

“Auntie Em!” Reagan cries when she notices me. “Do you wanna play Tag with us?”

“Not right now, sweetheart. In fact, I think we should end the game right now before poor Chef Cadeau gets knocked right over.”

The French chef gives me an appreciative smile. “I am making macaroni and cheese for dinner as per ze children’s requests, madam,” he says in his slightly accented English. “And for you?”

Since I have zero appetite, I beg off dinner and join Josh in the breakfast nook. He’s frowning so hard at this book that I’m half-worried he’s about to take a swing at it.

“You okay, kiddo?”

“The girls have been screaming and running around all day. I have a headache.”

I sigh. “You and me both.”

Apparently, Reagan and Caroline have decided to ignore me because they’re still playing their spirited game of Tag.

“Girls!” I raise my voice just so I can be heard above the din. “Can we use our quiet voices now? It’s almost dinner time. I can see your dolls off in the corner. How about you play with them until dinner’s ready?”

They scurry to the corner where they’ve dumped their dolls and politely lower their voices a few notches. Thank God for small favors.

I cross my legs but I can stillfeelhim inside me. I should have gone up to my room first and showered. I should have washed him off me. I hate that it didn’t even cross my mind before now. I hate even more that a part of me doesn’t want to lose the scent of him on my skin.

I spoke too soon about the small favors, though. “No! That’smydoll!” Caroline’s shrill voice is a drill to the side of my head.

“ButIwant to play with her. Youneverlet me play with her!”

“Give her to me—”

“No! Get your hands off—”

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