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I turn back to the sink and rinse my mouth out, pretending to ignore the animosity I can practically feel coming off my best friend.
“What?” I ask when I finish up and he still hasn’t said anything. “You wanna go grab breakfast?”
“No,” he says slowly. “You beating off to our RA? Something you wanna tell me, Atty?”
I normally choose not to get in the middle of his issues with Corvin, but I think he just tacked me there with a giant, red circle on my chest.
“Beating off—dude, what the fuck?”
Shiloh leans his hip on the sink and rolls his eyes. “You were literally just eye-fucking the dude. Too bad for you I hear he’s a picky fucker.”
“I wasn’t—“ I groan and drag a hand down my face. “I was thinking. I happened to be looking in his direction. Jesus, Loh. When did you turn into a damn attack dog?”
I expect him to stand down after that. That we’ll shake it off and move on with our day, but instead he storms off back to the room, and I’m left standing there wondering what the hell just happened.
By the time I’ve cleaned up my stuff, grabbed my clothes, and walk into our dorm room, Shiloh is dressed in his navy hoodie and gray sweatpants. He’s sitting on his bed, cross legged, and shoots me a glare as soon as I step into the room.
I shut the door and hold my hands up. “I wasn’t checking him out, Loh. I promise.”
His jaw ticks, and he looks away. “I thought you were straight.”
Okay, we’re still doing this.
Push the lie or give out some honesty?
“Shiloh,” I sigh his name, grabbing some boxers and a tank out of my dresser and quickly tossing them on. “Honestly, I’m not sure what I am.”
I bump his knee with mine as I take up the space beside him on the bed, and I take it as a good sign when he doesn’t push me away.
“Are you saying you might be into guys?” he asks, head tilted back and staring at the ceiling. He’s working his jaw and throat like he’s nervous, and I can’t figure out why or how to put him at ease.
“I’m saying it’s possible. Guys are… I mean, they’re hot. I don’t mind looking at ’em.”
He scoffs, still refusing to look at me. “Try again after you’ve fucked one.”
“Fuck’s sake, Loh!” I flop onto my back and dig the heels of my hands into my eyes. “I don’t have to fuck someone to know I’m into them.”
“So, you are into guys.”
“I said I don’t know. Why are you making a big deal about this?”
“I’m not.” He finally follows my lead and lays back, hands resting on his stomach. “You’ve just never been interested in them until now.”
It’s my turn to sigh. “Not that I’ve told you about.”
“What? Why wouldn’t you tell me?”
“It’s complicated. I’m still figuring it out. You’ve had enough on your plate—“
“Oh, fuck you!” He sits up and shoves at my shoulder. “Don’t blame you keeping secrets on me being trans. That just makes you a fucking asshole.”
“That’s not what I meant. Loh.”
He hops off the bed, digging around underneath.
“Shiloh. Loh. C’mon.”
He pops back up with a bottle of something in his hands. It’s a dark liquor, but I can’t read the label.
