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Blair’s hand reaches for mine as he follows me up, and our eyes meet in the mirror showing a look like fiery burning coals in his.
“Atlas.” He paces to stand in front of me, drawing my eyes away from his reflection and directly into his intense stare. Both of his hands come to rest on the back of my head, holding me close as his body breaks the barrier of my bubble. “I love you.” He pushes out each word like a stone being dropped into the ocean. “I love you just as fiercely and strongly as I do Shiloh. That won’t change.”
He swallows, and I follow the movement of his throat to his heaving chest. “But it’s different now,” he adds. “It means something different to me.”
It’s like Blair has his own source of gravity, a gravitational pull that has my hands anchoring to his waist and pressing closer until his back hits the mirror and his face tilts up towards mine.
“Blair Novak. Are you saying this is more than a thought experiment?”
His smile is almost sad, but there’s a wistfulness to it, a longing. “I’m saying I don’t think it ever was.”
I take his mouth in a firm kiss, grabbing his face with both of my hands. There’s no tongue, just lips claiming one another over and over until Blair turns away, panting.
He looks at me, and I can tell he’s been agonizing over this. Over these feelings. It’s in the way his mouth quivers, how his fingers tremble on my neck.
“You thought of me when this all started. And I’ve thought of you… in the back of my mind I’ve thought of you for years. How kind and caring you are. How I want that in someone who loves me.” His voice cracks, and I crash my lips down on his again to take the pained sound away.
I kiss him until his lips are red and puffy, until the tension drains from his shoulders and his arms hang loosely around my neck. I kiss him until his head thunks against the mirror and his eyes watch me dazed and half-lidded.
“We really need to talk about this,” I say, trailing my nose across his cheek to his ear. “About us.”
He chuckles. “Isn’t that what we just did?”
I pull away and drag his intense, beautiful stare to mine. “A serious, sit down conversation. What this means to us. What we want it to be. When I don’t have to worry about your brother stepping out and catching us before we tell him.”
Blair’s eyes widen, and his lips part with a worried exhale. “Oh. Shiloh’s here? Shit.” He doesn’t try to extract himself, though. Instead his hands slide down my chest and grip my hoodie. “That should make me want to pull away, shouldn’t it? That’s what a good big brother would do.”
I trap his jaw between my fingers, and he breathes a soft sigh. “You are an incredible big brother. I’m not Shiloh’s property, Blair. I’m not his boyfriend.”
“But you’re like the center of his universe.”
“Shut up,” I whisper, letting my lips just rest on top of his. “We can talk about it later. I’m working the late shift. Come see me tonight?”
He lets go of my shirt and nods, opening his mouth as one last invitation for my tongue to stroke his before I push away. I’m only mildly surprised to see the erection straining his shorts that he has to readjust.
“I’ll see you tonight.” He smiles and gives my arm a gentle squeeze, then steps around me. It’s a conscious effort not to follow him, not to drag him back and pin him against the wall so I can keep kissing all over his beautiful, breathless body.
I wait until his footsteps fade away, and then I drop my forehead to the mirror, cupping my own throbbing dick to get it to cool down. I’ve never been wanted the way Blair wants me, and that does something to me. Seeing him open up and let pieces of himself free that he’s been holding back—it shouldn’t turn me on this much.
“I don’t think the mirror consented to you being grabby with it.”
I nearly jump at Shiloh’s voice and quickly tuck my dick into the waistband of my shorts.
“It’s called taking a self reflection moment. Try it some time.” I smack his shoulder just as Shiloh whacks his towel at my chest, and we’re both grinning at each other like a couple of kids.
“Nah. I’d rather you whip me into shape, Atty.” His voice almost sounds like it has an undertone of flirting, but I shake it off. That’s just everyone’s assumptions taking up space in my head where they don’t belong.
If Shiloh were into me, he would have told me a long time ago. He has zero problems going after what he wants.
“Sure you aren’t too tired? You looked like a wreck when you got here.”
“I’m fine. Shower perked me right up.” He crosses his arms with a big ass grin on his face. “Looks like you perked up yourself, bud.” His eyes flick down to my crotch and back up, making my face burn.
“Adrenaline,” I say, rolling my eyes. “Do you want this or not, because I can totally go to the dorm and get a nap before my shift.”
Shiloh snorts. “An eight hour nap? Take it easy, big guy.” He gives me a matching eye roll and winks. “Let’s get sweaty.”
There’s that flirty tone again. But it has to be my imagination. I’m still just horny and awestruck over Blair’s impromptu visit. Just because everyone else thinks there’s something going on doesn’t mean there is.
