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Augustine ignored the thought, eventually hauling himself out of bed and prowling the corridors for a time, making his guards nervous. Then he went up to his office and sat at his desk, with the big stained-glass window featuring the golden oak of Isavere at his back. His guards would be thankful he was in one place instead of roaming around, and he leaned back in his chair, kicking his feet up on the desk and put his mind to pondering the mystery of Freddie.
Her fear was a puzzle. She normally hid her emotions well and the fact that she hadn’t been able to disguise that she’d been afraid, meant she must have felt it very strongly.
He had to know why. It wasn’t him she was afraid of, which meant it had to be something else. Being his queen shouldn’t intimidate her, not when she basically ran the country herself, so maybe it was the issue of being married. He understood, many people didn’t want to get married—he’d never planned on it himself.
But that was something they’d discuss. Obviously theirs wasn’t a love match, and him being her boss complicated matters, as did the fact that he was a king. Again, though, they could discuss what they wanted their marriage to look like, determine boundaries, etcetera. He didn’t want a platonic marriage, that was certain, not with her and not given the chemistry between them. She might not agree however, in which case... Well, again that would be something they’d need to discuss.
What about Philippe?
The electricity in his bloodstream sparked and crackled, making all his muscles tighten. Yes, well, he’d already decided he wasn’t going to abdicate. He couldn’t, not now. Not given he had an heir.
Your father would have firm views on that anyway.
The old, aching grief that lived inside his heart pulled tight.
Piero would never have countenanced an abdication. He’d have seen it as a failure, especially after what Augustine’s mother had sacrificed for him.
But what has your rule been if not a failure?
Augustine shoved the thought away as his phone buzzed in his pocket. He drew it out, checking the screen. It was his friend Khalil, so he hit the accept button.
‘My friend,’ he said by way of a greeting. ‘If it’s late to be calling me, it must be extremely late for you.’
‘It is,’ Khalil’s deep voice responded. ‘But I am up anyway, and Galen’s asleep, and I have news.’
Augustine grinned. ‘If you’re calling to tell me you’re blissfully happy and Sidonie is the most perfect woman in the history of the world, then maybe you might want to save that for a text.’
‘A text you cannot read anyway,’ Khalil said dryly, being well aware of what Augustine could and couldn’t do. He and Galen were the only ones, apart from Freddie, who knew.
‘Which is why you should save it for a text.’
His friend laughed. ‘This news isn’t for a text. Sidonie is pregnant.’
It was so close to Augustine’s own situation that it sent an electric shock straight down his spine. ‘What? Already?’
They had only got married four months ago.
‘She is sixteen weeks pregnant.’ There was a smile in Khalil’s voice, his joy obvious. ‘We waited to be sure.’
Augustine pushed aside his own reaction. ‘Congratulations, Khal. Do you know what you’re having?’
‘A girl. She will be the most amazing queen Al Da’ira has ever had.’
Despite himself, Augustine smiled. He was pleased for his friend. Happiness wasn’t anything he’d thought Khalil would ever find given how much of his humanity he’d had to sacrifice to secure his crown, yet found it he had. With the friend he’d met in his Oxford days, a gorgeous little redhead who’d tempered his darkness with her light.
How will Freddie temper you?
She wouldn’t. Because what he and Freddie had was different to Khal and Sidonie’s relationship. Khal and Sidonie were in love, while he didn’t love Freddie and she didn’t love him. Love would never be part of that particular equation.
The urge to tell Khal about his own situation was strong, but he didn’t want to take away from his friend’s news with his own. This was Khal’s moment, not his.
‘Of course she will,’ he said instead. ‘With Sidonie as her mother, how can she fail not to be?’
‘That is very true.’ There was a slight pause. ‘Something is wrong, Gus. What is it?’
Augustine closed his eyes. His friend was too damn sharp, that was the problem. For a moment he debated lying, but then Khal said, ‘And do not tell me you are fine. I am not an old friend for nothing.’
‘Damn you,’ Augustine said with an attempt at lightness. ‘I was trying to let you have your moment.’
