Page 39 of Smokin' Hot (Smoke)


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“Saxon Houston?” she asked as a big smile spread across her face.

I wanted to slap her right then. I’d forgotten that Sammy had gone to the same high school as Saxon. She came from money. Ran in his circles.

“Sam,” he replied.

“What are you doing here?” She paused and realized that I was the one beside him. “With Haisley?” Her voice trailed off. It registered on her that quickly, and I saw the shock in her eyes. “No way. Oh shit. You’re who got her pregnant?” she asked, looking back at Saxon.

“Yeah, and we have an appointment. We need to get going. Good to see you, Sam,” he replied and opened the door for me.

“You too!” she called out, but he didn’t look back.

He couldn’t get out of there fast enough. Was he embarrassed of me? The idea that he didn’t want people other than the family to know I was pregnant with his baby made my stomach sink. When we reached his truck, he opened the door and helped me up more forcefully than necessary before heading to the driver’s side.

I buckled and willed myself not to get emotional about this. I was so done with crying about crap. Especially since it always revolved around him. He slammed his door and gripped the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles turned white. The veins on his neck stood out, and his nostrils flared.

“Saxon?” I said his name softly, hoping he didn’t turn on me.

“You should have worn a shirt over that top,” he said, turning his head toward me.

“We are supposed to wear this. It’s part of the uniform,” I explained.

“Have you fucked him?” His question sounded like a snarl.

“Who? Trace?” I asked, horrified.

“Whoever the fuck that son of a bitch was in there, touching you.”

“God, no. He’s a slut.”

Saxon seemed to ease somewhat, but not completely. He wasn’t jealous. Right? This was just about the baby. Did he think I had sex a lot? Was that it? He thought he was having a kid with someone who had slept around?

I fisted my hands in my lap and decided this was one of those times I had to be strong. I could do this without getting sick. He needed to know.

“I’ve only ever slept with you.”

“Haisley, don’t. I know what a virgin is.”

Closing my eyes tightly, I inhaled. I didn’t want to talk about this. “A hymen can be broken other ways.”

There was a moment of silence before he responded. “Sure. Yeah. I know it can. I don’t want to upset you or fight. I’m trying to get along with you,” Saxon replied, but I knew he didn’t believe me. He was just saying it to end the conversation.

I hated that he thought I was like my mom.

“When I was ten, my stepfather … he did things to me and my sister. He stuck things in us. I think … I think he probably did more to Jamaica. She was quieter. I fought back.” The sick bile in my throat as I said the words aloud for the first time to anyone burned. I wasn’t sure I could say more. I’d shocked myself by blurting it out.

The warmth of his hand covered mine, and I let out a small sob.

“You don’t have to say any more. I’m sorry. That’s hard to hear. I can’t imagine how hard it is to tell.”

The rawness in his voice undid me, and I let out another sob.

“Fuck,” he whispered, and his hand left me.

I felt the center between us move away and opened my eyes to see it gone.

“Come here.” Saxon pulled me over to him and held me.

I clung to him, desperate for the only affection I had known. Saxon was the first person who had shown me true affection. I hungered for it. When he offered it now, I wanted to hold on as long as I could. I never knew when I would get it again. Or if this would be the last time.

His hand ran down over my hair as he pressed a kiss to my temple. “You give me a name, and I’ll kill him,” he said against my head.

I let out a strangled laugh, then shook my head. “He’s my three youngest siblings’ dad. They’re all boys, and he’s a good dad to them.”

Saxon tensed. “Is he still in that trailer?”

“No. He’s been gone for years.”

I could stay like this for hours, but I knew I had a doctor’s appointment. One I didn’t want to make us late for.

I pulled back and wiped at my face. “Sorry. I’ve never said that out loud to anyone before,” I told him.

He cupped my face and looked at me. “If you need to talk about it, I’ll listen.” He paused, and a pained look crossed his face. “I might end up killing him. But I’ll listen.”

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