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Why hadn’t anyone told me he was hurt? What had happened to him? My eyes scanned the rest of his body to see if he was okay. Was there blood anywhere?
When I reached him, a lump had formed in my throat. “What happened to you?” I asked.
Had he even put something on his wounds?
He shook his head. “That doesn’t matter,” he replied. His voice was raspy.
“You look exhausted, and you need to clean and doctor those cuts,” I told him. “Why are you sitting out here?”
“Because it’s as close as I could get to you.”
I stood there, looking at him. The ache inside of my chest was for him. He looked so defeated and broken. The sadness in his eyes was killing me.
“I don’t know how to do this,” I whispered. “I want you to hold me, but I feel like wanting that is betraying my brother.”
Saxon opened his arms. “We can figure it out, but right now, I really fucking need to hold you.”
I went into his arms, unable to resist. All the emotions, tangled up and battling inside me, were still there, but needing Saxon was the strongest one. His arms tightened around me, and he took a deep breath, lowering his head close to my ear.
“I’m sorry.” His voice was raw with pain. “I’m so fucking sorry.”
I clung to him the way I had known I would once I let him touch me. I wouldn’t be able to leave him. Saxon owned my heart. No matter what he had done or what he would do in the future, I needed him. I blinked as the tears clouded my vision. This must be unconditional love.
“Please, Haisley, don’t leave me. I can’t—” His voice broke. “I need you with me. You’re my center. Please, if you leave me, you’re going to destroy me. I can’t survive that.”
More tears poured down my face as I held on to him. “Leaving you was never an option. I love you.”
He pulled his head back and looked down at me. His face was breaking my heart. “You’re not leaving me?” he asked, looking frantic.
“No.” I shook my head.
He closed his eyes and let out a long, heavy breath. “Thank God.”
I took a hand from around his back and reached up to cup the least injured side of his face gently and kissed the side of his mouth that wasn’t broken open and swollen.
His hands fisted in my shirt, and he held me tighter.
“Come inside. Eat something. Let me doctor your face,” I said, looking up into his eyes.
“I just want to take you home,” he replied. “I’m afraid you’ll change your mind.”
“Saxon, I won’t lie. I am struggling with this. But even last night, when it all happened, not once did leaving you cross my mind. I’m not going to change my mind. And you need to eat, and your face needs medicine. Your lip might need stitches.”
He wrapped his arms further around me and held me against his chest. “Fuck, I love you so goddamn much, it hurts.”
We stood like that for a few moments, and then I stepped back and reached for his hand. “Let’s go inside.”
He threaded his fingers in mine, and we started for the door when he stopped.
“Wait,” he said, then ran back to the truck and got something out of the front. He took long strides to get back to me, holding a plate with a sandwich, chips, and a brownie on it. Nothing had been touched. “Trinity brought me food out when I got here,” he explained.
“Why didn’t you eat it?”
He wrapped his free arm around my waist and pulled me against his side. “I didn’t have an appetite. I thought my reason for living hated me.”
I shook my head. “I could never hate you.”
He sighed. “Last night, when you wouldn’t let me touch you”—he shuddered—“fuck, that messed me up.”
We reached the door, and I opened it. Saxon dropped his arm from my waist, and I went inside. The sound of the others came from the kitchen. Saxon closed the door behind him, and then his hand found mine, and he held it. With his need to touch me and the way he looked at me, I could tell he was scared. He didn’t trust that I wasn’t going to change my mind.
He led me to the kitchen, and when we walked in, everyone stopped talking.
“Thank fuck,” Kye said, staring at us.
“You too? What happened to your face?” Trinity asked Saxon, then turned to frown at Kye.
Kye shrugged, and I realized Saxon was glaring at him.
“I’m good,” Saxon told her.
“I want to doctor his face. Especially his lip,” I said. “Do you have some supplies?”
Trinity stood up. “I’ll go get the stuff you need,” she replied.
“Jesus, it’s a fucking busted lip. What he did to my nose is worse,” Kye grumbled. “No need to baby the fuck out of him.”
