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He wraps a hand around the back of my neck, engulfing it in his touch, and pushes us closer until we’re forehead to forehead. “I want you to be happy, even if it’s not with me.” There’s a hint of sadness in his baby blues and I wish more than anything that I could sweep it away. “I don’t know how else to have you.”
“Why can’t you just try with me?” My voice begs for something, anything.
“I’m sorry. I can’t. It’s too hard.” He glances down into his lap before his gaze threads with mine once more. “We can be together exclusively, but if it stops working for one of us, or if you find someone you want something real with, we’ll end it. But if this isn’t something you can—”
“Fine,” I interrupt. I need this. I want him. He makes me feel too good to let him go.
“Are you sure because—”
“I said fine.” My lips curl around the words. “If you’re trying to make me change my mind, keep talking.” Maybe I’m crazy, maybe I’m not thinking straight at all, but in this moment, I’ve realized I’d hold on to a whisper of his heart rather than face another goodbye.
He takes my hand, bringing my palm to his lips, leaving a soft kiss behind. “Whoever he is, the one who gets to call you his someday, make sure he knows how lucky he is.” His eyes are soft yet bleak as they hold mine. A wedge of grief fills my throat and a single tear tracks down my cheek.
“If he doesn’t realize what he has, just call me. I’ll set him straight.” He smiles but his eyes are empty. And as I try to smile back, my lips remain still. I wish more than anything this could turn into more, but I can’t take something he refuses to give.
He breaks eye contact and draws a deep, audible breath. “Come on, let me show you what I brought us.”
I untangle myself from him and take the chair next to his as he stands to grab the bag still on the table. I scrunch my nose. “So what do you have in there? Sex toys?”
“Whoa.” He lets out an amused chuckle. “I’m starting to wonder who the dirtier one of us is.” I shrug my shoulder with a hint of a smile. “Don’t worry, babe. I already made a mental note to add some to my next shopping list.”
“Well if there are no sex toys in there, then it better be something good.”
“Oh, believe me, it is.” He reaches into the bag and removes a black bakery box, one I know well because it’s my favorite one.Marry me!
“I remember how much you love cupcakes, so I thought you’d love these.” Lifting the top of the box, he reveals six delicious looking cupcakes, all different flavors.
My belly growls in response.Eh, What workout?“Thank you, I love that place, but they don’t open until eight. How did you manage this?” I grab a chocolate Oreo flavored one as he hands me a paper plate from the bag.
“Perks of knowing the owner.” He gives me a half grin, his teeth gleaming.
“Well, it’s a good thing we’re fuck buddies.”
“Friends with benefits,” he corrects, picking up the funfetti cupcake and placing it on his own plate.
I roll my eyes. “There’s a difference?”
“Um, yeah. Fuck buddies you know—just fuck. No hanging out, no texting, unless it’s to get some. You get it.”
Placing my dessert down, I tuck my clenched fists under my chin and bat my lashes. “Oh dear Yoda, do tell me more.”
“Wise ass. You’re so focused on my dick you forgot the whole friendship part of our arrangement. I mean not that I could blame you.”
He’s impossible. I want to throttle him sometimes…and kiss him. A lot. Those full lips are too damn kissable. And his cock—well don’t even get me started there. “Ah, my apologies. I’ve learnedsomuch today. Who knew there were so many terms fornotbeing in a relationship?”
“See? I’m not just a sex object. I’m full of useful knowledge. Anything else you need me to teach you today?” He’s full of something all right. He takes the last big bite of his cupcake, his sinful tongue darting out to capture the crumbs off of his lips.
“So, you’re not just here to fuck me? This is you being a friend?” I tease.
“Oh, I’ll definitely fuck you.” He gets up, tossing his plate in the trash, then comes over toward my side, towering over me. “But instead of leaving after, I’ll make you lunch and tell you how pretty you are.”
“I’m starting to like this whole friends with benefits thing more and more.”
His gaze drifts down to my thighs then up toward my lips, a sensual gleam in his eyes. “I promise you, the benefits will be worth it.”
A shiver runs like a ghostly touch on my skin. I bite my lower lip, the pain only slight compared to the need swelling between my thighs. Swallowing down the nerves climbing up my throat, I stare back at the cupcake now long forgotten. How could a man who’s so wrong for me feel so absolutely right?
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