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Laying my head down on the dirty pillow, I close my eyes, recalling the night that we first met and how much I wanted her. The image is so vivid, so I reach out and touch her even though I know she isn’t real.
You’re everything I need,she whispers, the same way she did that day we sat on my sofa, that day before everything went to shit. I’ve held on to those words since she said them. I pray like hell she still feels that way. I hope I’m still enough even when I can’t be there. But I have to believe this isn't the end, it's only the beginning.
Chapter 33
Lilah
Aweek passes, or should I say drags. Every day is slower than the last and every day my heart aches to be with him. I haven’t received any updates on his case, but that’s to be expected. These things take a long time and I have no choice but to be patient even when I don’t want to be.
On Tuesday, I called my boss and told him I’m coming back sooner than he wanted me to and returned the next day. I can’t spend another minute cooped up in Damian’s home with all of his things, thinking about every painful experience of the past few weeks. I needed a distraction. Work is the perfect one.
“So, we’re going out tonight,” Lexi announces, as she struts into my office.
“Maybeyouare, but I’m going home.” It’s one thing to go back to work but a whole other ballgame to go and enjoy myself while he suffers. Not happening.
“Please! Think of it as an early birthday present for me.” She pouts. “I’m your best friend.”
“Your birthday isn’t for another month.” I roll my eyes. “Try again.”
“Fine. Jax and Gabe are coming too. They asked me to invite you. Come on, please Lilah. Ineedyou there.”
I squint, glaring at her. “Why do you need me to come?”
She sits on my desk and scratches her nose. “I can’t be alone with Jax. He makes me want to scream. I need you as my buffer.”
“Oh please, can you go fuck him already? I know you two like each other, so just do it.”
She swallows, looking down. “Well….”
My eyes go wide. “Wait. What? Oh. My. God. You didn’t?”
“Twice. Don’t look at me like that! You just told me to do it!”
“I’m just shocked right now. Wow. Wait, are you dating? I think it’d be great if you guys did.”
“Date Jax?” She laughs. “It was just sex that one day. That’s it. Neither one of us wants anything more.” My mouth flies open. I hadn’t anticipated that. “I was sad when you were in the hospital so we… ya know.”
“What?! When? Where?”
“In his car…while you were in surgery.” She bites her thumbnail. “He’s got a really nice… car.”
“Oh my God, Lexi!” I don’t even know what to think.
“I do mean his car, but I also meant other things…”
“Um, so how was it?” I probably shouldn’t ask.
“Ugh. I wish it wasn’t good,” she runs her hand through her blond hair, “but man he can fuck. Best I ever had kind of good.” She closes her eyes, as though reliving it as we speak.
“Yep, that’s enough information. Thanks.”
“Hey, you asked. But I’m nervous. I can’t be around him.”
“Can’t be around him without wanting to jump him you mean?” After her fiancé cheated a year ago, it took months just to get her out of the slump.Bastard. Maybe Jax could make her happy.
“Shut up!” She laughs, smacking me on the arm. “So please, will you come? It’s just dinner.”
“Fine! But I’m not staying long.”
