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“Hey, little one,” he murmurs, pressing a kiss to my temple.
“Hey.” I squeeze the glass dildo in my hand, suddenly feeling guilty. Wrong. “I’m not going to - it’s not like that.”
“It can be. If you want it to be. He fucking deserves it.”
“I’m not a rapist.” I tilt my chin until I can press a kiss to his mouth. Just a soft one. Quick. Because we have all the time in the world for more of them, but I’m damn ready for this piece of shit to be dealt with now. “Thank you for letting me be here.”
He smiles against my lips before pulling back just enough to peer into my eyes. He looks proud. “Go get him, Case.”
Grinning, I move away from Jake and raise my hand over my head. With as much force as I can, I bring it down and let the dildo fall. It only cracks. I frown at it, pissed it’s not cooperating, and pick it back up. When I drop it the second time, it shatters like it was supposed to. The sound sends a shiver of fear down my spine, my body remembering what happened the last time glass shattered near me. I ignore it.
DuGray is naked now. I stare at him, at this man who took so much from me. “Where were we? Oh, right. I was reminding you of this spot. Of what happened here. This might help you.”
I gesture for Travis and Maison to move him again, pointing to the glass. They don’t even hesitate. They just pick him up by his biceps - ignoring his shriek of pain when they jostle his broken elbow and dislocated shoulder - and move him forward, dropping him right in the glass. He unfortunately manages to swallow the sound when his knees drive into the shards. That’s okay. I’m not nearly finished with him.
“Remember yet?” I ask him.
“You drank my piss like it was the best thing you’ve ever tasted, you filthy little-” this time, it’s Travis that stops him, kicking a boot onto the knife in his thigh until it’s all the way to the handle.
“Don’t,” I say softly. “Thank you, but don’t. I knew what I was getting into when I cut the tape.”
“Casey,” Jake warns, his expression tight. “You don’t have to listen to what this fucker has to say.”
I look at DuGray. There’s a single tear falling down his cheek and the slightest tremble to his body. It’s almost ridiculous to think I was afraid of him once. It’s still there, fear lingering at the base of my spine, waiting to shoot through me. Like muscle memory. Conditioning. This man taught me that the world began and ended with him, and that my life did too. But I’m in control now. It’s his life in my hands.
“I want to hear him,” I tell everyone, but I keep my eyes focused on DuGray to make sure he understands. To make sure he’s listening carefully. Because I’m in charge tonight. He no longer gets to be the monster. I’m the monster. And he doesn’t get to die until he realizes it. “I want to hear him because he’s going to apologize to me.”
DuGray snorts a laugh. “Apologize for what, esclave? For using you the way you deserved?”
I ignore him, turning my gaze to the room again.
“You should get a better leash for your puppy, Benny,” DuGray continues, his accent thicker than usual. I wonder if it’s the blood in his mouth or the pain. “Please tell me you at least fucked him. It’s what he’s good for. It’d be a shame for you to waste his talents.”
Jake bristles beside me but doesn’t say or do anything.
“Did he ever tighten back up? He was so loose there at the end.” DuGray tsks. I see what I was looking for, leaving them behind. DuGray makes a sound of pain. Someone - probably Jake - apparently decided with me gone it would be okay to silence him. I don’t mind.
“Can you bring him over here?” I call, grabbing the leather bench and dragging it away from the wall. It’s heavier than I thought it was. I can’t believe they ever managed to move the damn thing with my body on it. Though I suppose my body didn’t weigh much back then.
Pieces of glass fall off DuGray as they drag him over. Jake reaches me first, eyeing the bench. “What do you need, little one?”
“Can you restrain him to it? Chest up?”
“Of course.”
“Thank you.” I give him a shaky smile, starting to wonder if I can do this. I spent the past few days thinking about this. Planning this. I know what causes tiny pinpricks of pain and what causes tidal waves of it. I know that some pain is so extreme that the body shuts it out, the mind no longer registering it. I know that there are things that can be done to the body that we shouldn’t survive, but somehow do. Terrible, horrific things. I learned all of that from him. And I plan on showing him how well he taught me.
Or, I planned to, at least. Now, with Jake watching me… I don’t know what I want to do anymore.
Will he still look at me the same? Does doing this make me just as bad as DuGray? Will this ruin me? Ruin us?
Should I be the better person and just kill him?
“Case?” I startle just as Jake wraps his fingers around the back of my neck. “You okay?”
“I just - what does this make me?”
“What? Hurting him?” I nod, my throat suddenly feeling too tight to speak. “It doesn’t make you anything, baby boy. But if it heals you? If it gives you closure? Then do it. We’re all here for you.”
