AllFreeNovel
Share Us
His smile falters, his eyes wary. "What does that mean to you? Me being yours? I need to know where we stand. You've been so confusing. It's killing me…"
"I know. I'm sorry, little one. I've been trying to be the good guy and not give into temptation, but…" I laugh softly. "I'm starting to think we're inevitable. And I'm starting to think that's damn beautiful, even if it scares the fuck out of me."
"Why does it scare you?"
"Too many reasons to talk about right now. I should already be dressed and down in the vault gearing up." I sigh. "But I'll say this for now - I want you just like you want me, and I'm done fighting that. We'll have to talk when I get back and figure shit out, but know that you're mine, if you still want to be. Mine in every way."
He blushes beautifully, understanding what the emphasis on every means. "I still want to be."
"Thank fuck." I kiss him again. Quick. Easy. Like I'll do it a million more times in my life. Because I will. "I should get going. I'll have my phone, okay? Call if you need anything."
"And you'll be safe?" he asks, his voice a soft tremble.
"I'll be safe. I'll come back to you."
"Promise?"
It's not a promise I can make, but for him? For him, I'll fight the whole fucking universe to keep it if I have to. "I promise."
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Casey
I’m okay the first few hours after Jake leaves, keeping myself busy with any task I can get my hands on. Matt and I fold laundry, the two of us listening to a historical podcast he picks out. It’s boring, but no one really argues when Matt picks something to watch or listen to. Mostly because, well, Matt can’t argue. Also, because it'd be like telling a sad, lost puppy no. So, we fold laundry and hear all about a Brazilian outlaw in the early 1900s.
I join Bryce for a swim in the pool after. He’s kind of a ridiculous swimmer, his movements spastic and slightly concerning. I almost suggest he stick to the doggy paddle. Not wanting to hurt his feelings, I just hangout on the other end of the pool and tell him about that Brazilian outlaw to fill the silence.
I fight a smirk while watching Ace try to chop wood, the man convinced he can be useful outside of his computers while the more physical operatives are gone. I work out 5 days a week, he tells me with a haughty tilt of his chin. Just because I can't rival Thor with my muscles doesn't mean I'm not in good shape. After he’s sweaty and flustered and kicking at the stump he’s been using to put logs on, I offer to help. He seems skeptical but allows it. When I chop three logs in a row with no issue - my dad and I loved to camp together in the summers - he grumbles under his breath and says he needs to go check his computers. I fight a laugh as he storms off, brushing a stray leaf from his fancy jacket.
I chat with Nolan while the two of us prepare dinner. After seeing how horrifically I handle the garlic - Seriously? Does no one in this house understand what mincing is? - I get demoted to washing the vegetables for him and stirring the noodles every time he glances at them and says, “Stir.” To get back at him for his bossiness, I point out that he and Maison seem to be getting even closer lately. He blushes and sputters and makes some sort of half-assed attempt to get me to forget that Maison Beckett exists.
At dinner, I smile and laugh and listen to everyone tell stories and share triumphs and tease each other like a family.
But then dinner is over, and everyone goes their own way. Ace to monitor the mission Jake and the others are on. Matt to keep Ace company. Bryce outside by the river to write in his journal. Nolan to his room with a bottle of wine and his eyes locked on his phone, cheeks flushed at whatever his screen is displaying.
And me - alone.
I bring David to Jake's room, steal one of his dirty shirts that smells so thickly of him that I can almost pretend he's here if I close my eyes, and drag his blankets and pillows to the floor to make a nest. Then I curl up around David and the shirt and send Jake a text: I miss you.
He answers almost immediately, his words bringing a smile to my face. I miss you too, little one. It's late there. Grab David and get some rest. Sleep in my room if you need to, I don't mind.
I take a selfie of me all curled up with that smile still in place and text back: You know me so well. Already made a comfy nest on your floor (don't get worried, your blankets are so fluffy I can't even tell I'm not on a mattress, promise). Be safe.
His answering text takes a little longer to come in, but it's worth the wait. Goddamn, you are the most beautiful boy I've ever seen. Close your eyes and pretend I'm there with you in your comfy nest. I'll be safe, promise. Dream of me.
Travis begs Carter to come to the safehouse shortly after they get their hands on Quinton. The man said some things about Carter's safety, making him panic. I let Carter hide out for most of the day, knowing he's probably struggling like I've been with our guys being gone, but I threaten him if he doesn't at least eat dinner, which I leave outside his door.
Eventually, enough is enough. He might like to sulk, but I've learned that sometimes you need to be around your people, and whether Carter likes it or not, we're his people. So, with Nolan, Bryce, and Matt in tow - and alcohol and food to sweeten the deal - I stage a takeover. Carter looks like he's about to burst into tears when he opens the door for us. He tries to smile, but it's painful to see. I'm thankful when he drops it.
"Let us in or we're going to sit outside your door all night and keep you awake, making you super jealous because of all this delicious food and tequila we have," Bryce threatens, gesturing to the sandwich and pickle I brought, the supersized carton of ice cream and spoons in Matt's hands, and the tequila Nolan is proudly waving. Not to mention the 5 different bags of chips Bryce is holding himself.
“Yeah, yeah, come in,” Carter mumbles, despite looking a little wary of us. Bryce dumps the chips on the bed and heads to the TV, loading the house Netflix account we all use. Nolan goes into the bathroom and comes back with a stack of disposable cups. Matt hands out spoons without making eye contact with anyone. I shove the plate of food into Carter’s hands, raising a brow at him in a dare to argue. He doesn’t argue. He just thanks me and starts shoveling the food into his mouth, probably starving.
“Something light,” I advise Bryce as he browses options for us to watch. Then, thinking of how Carter and Travis still might not be in the best place - and how Jake and I are sort of in limbo too - I add, “And not all romantic and shit.”
Bryce waves a hand in my direction. “Yeah, yeah. I’m looking.”
Matt walks forward and puts his hand out for the remote. Bryce frowns but gives it away, having learned the same lesson as me - you don't argue with Matt. I think Matt has caught on to this. I also think he may be abusing his power, but the guy has been through enough so I'll let him have it anyway. He puts on the Great British Bakeoff. Carter grins. It feels a little easier to breathe.
