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Of course he is.
I’ve just been brought to Master’s friend’s room and I’m being fucking rude. I’m not paying attention. I just looked at another slave. I’m not even kneeling.
I fix that last one immediately, gracefully moving down to my knees so I’m settled at Master’s feet.
The air in the room feels impossibly heavy.
“Casey,” Master says softly, his hand coming to rest on my head. I lift my chin just enough to press into the touch, wanting him to know I’m not ignoring him while remaining respectful. “Your friend is here. Remember, I told you Carter is here?”
I can tell this is a test. What a ridiculous thought - a slave having a friend. I close my eyes, wishing Carter wasn’t here to see this. “I have no friends, Master. There’s only you.”
“Casey, we talked about this.” Master kneels in front of me, the movement so incredibly wrong that I have to fight to keep from saying something. “You’re safe now, remember? You and Carter both. I’m sorry for not telling you sooner, but your health was more important.”
I suddenly feel fucking exhausted, my body curling up like I can hide from this whole thing. How long are we going to play this game? Will I have to pretend to believe this - even though it's guaranteed to get me punished - for Master to finally stop?
"This isn't a game like your old master used to play. I promised no games. I promised no tests. Remember? This is real, Casey. I promise." I release a breath, feeling close to tears. Master continues. "You can talk to him. He's your friend. It's okay. You're safe."
I should play the game, shouldn't I? It means I’ll be punished for believing I could be free. For even daring to want to be free. And I’ll probably be punished for talking to a slave, too. For believing I’m worthy of a friend. It might even get Carter punished. But Master will find a reason to punish me no matter what, most likely. Carter's Master will as well. At least this way, the game can be over.
I force my gaze up until it lands on Carter. My throat threatens to close, probably my body trying to save me from this dangerous move, but I still manage a soft, "H-hey."
My friend sways forward before dropping to his knees right beside Master. He looks unbelievably happy. Oh no. No, Carter, don't believe them! "Hey, Casey. God, you're - I can't believe you're here! It's been killing me not to come see you!"
So, they've been playing the game longer with him.
Poor Carter…
Realizing Carter expects me to respond, I dart my eyes to Master. The man is just watching us. Studying us, almost.
What can I say that will get me in the least amount of trouble?
I replay Carter's words before settling with, "I'm here, yes."
"I'm so sorry for the party. I'm so fucking sorry." Carter's eyes are watery, his voice thick. "I didn't mean to get you in trouble. I'm so sorry."
"I knew better," I tell him, partly because I hate seeing him so upset, partly because Master is still watching closely, and partly because it's the truth. "I shouldn't have engaged with another slave like I did. I deserved to be punished."
Carter flinches before looking at me like he doesn't even recognize me. "No, Casey-"
"Leave it," Master says. He gives Carter a smile that seems almost sad. "Focus on now. The past is complicated for him. We're working on it."
We are?
I’d really rather we not.
"Oh. Right. I - okay." Carter shifts his gaze back to me, his smile forced. "Do you want some clothes? When I found out the truth, that was one of the first things I wanted to do. It felt weird, but good. I can get you something to wear, if you want?"
So many landmines in that string of sentences, just waiting for me to step on them. I shake my head, wishing I could beg Carter to stop. "No. I - no, thank you. I don't need clothes."
"Are you sure? It's kind of cold in here." Carter tugs at his sweater. I hadn’t even noticed it until now. His master is playing a good game too. "The clothes are big on me, but they'll fit you better. You still have a larger frame, even if you're…" He doesn't finish the sentence. I don’t mind. I know I’m a sliver of what I used to be. That's okay. This is what a slave is meant to be like. I feel bad that Carter hasn't learned that yet.
"No, thank you.”
“It’s me, Casey. Carter." My friend's smile wobbles. "You - you remember me, right?”
I look at Master again, unsure. When the man nods, I let myself say the truth. "Of course."
“You don’t have to act like a slave anymore. Not in here. You’re safe now. For real. Benny and Nathan won’t hurt us.”
