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Now was not the time to wander off into a pity party. Jim was waiting for his answer, and he suspected that Jax was, as well. He wondered how much Jax knew about his life. He had not tried to find out anything about Jax. He’d had to keep his heart free of that pain, which was why he’d been so focused on work, first in the Broadway musicals and then with thequartet.
“It’s hard to choose,” he began, stalling for time. “I liked all the places we played in for different reasons.” Not a lie at all, but still an evasion and he knew it. What did it matter which country he chose? Jim would forget about him soon anyway. “I really enjoyed it when we played in Athens. I loved Greek mythology in high school, and it was a thrill to actually be able to visit some of the places I’d only read about in English class until then.”
“Annie, my wife, will love you.” Jim grinned at him. “She’s an English teacher and lover of all types of mythologies. And she loves to read fiction that uses them as the base for their characters.”
“I take it you couldn’t care less?” Noah guessed.
“Let’s just say I’m not as … invested as she is,” Jim replied diplomatically.
Jax snorted and Noah looked at him. His dark gaze held Noah’s own for a moment, and he swore he could almost see Jax’s thoughts in them. But he knew he no longer had any idea what his former lover was thinking. It had been too long since they’d looked at each other as more than strangers, and he’d be damned if he let himself hope they could return to those days. He’d been rejected once, and that was more than enough.
Chapter 5
Jax
Hedidcare, even if hecouldn’t
do a damned thingabout it.
Jax was doing his best to keep his eyes off Noah, especially because he could almost see the tension radiating off him like heat off a hot engine. He wished he could help him relax, but as he himself was on a knife’s edge, he knew it was best if he kept his mouth shut and his eyes to himself. He kept an eye on the boys instead while Jim quizzed Noah, and he got to hear about the life he had lived these last ten years. Shocked at Noah’s apparent lack of excitement about his travels, he’d looked up in time to catch his eye and did his best to keep his emotions offhis face.
“Maybe someday you can go back for fun instead of work,” Jimsuggested.
“Maybe,” was Noah’s non-committalresponse.
Jax wanted to butt in, to ask why he wasn’t more enthusiastic about his life and the opportunities that he’d enjoyed. Noah didn’t seem to be happy, but Jax couldn’t imagine it was because they’d broken things off between them. Well,he’dbroken things off. Noah was barely into his thirties, and he’d clearly been living a wonderful life professionally, so why was he so… subdued?
“When are you going back on tour?” he asked, intruding into the conversation in which he hadn’t taken part so far.
Noah flinched. What the hell wasthatabout?
“Not this year. I’m takinga break.”
His tone was almost defensive, as though he was daring anyone—Jax—to question his decision. Somewhere in those last four words was a story that Jax was suddenly dying to hear. Noah had disappeared from social media about six months ago, so Jax surmised that something had happened back then that affected his decision to take a break. But what? Jax let his eye roam over Noah, for the first time unconcerned about whether or not Jim would notice. The younger man didn’t appear to be sick and from the little he’d said, it didn’t sound like he was losing his love for performance. So what the hell wasgoing on?
“The yacht club is offering boat rides in an hour. Who wants to go?”
Jax looked at Noah, who shook his head. “I’m a flaming landlubber,” he said almost shyly. “I’ll swim, but boats give me the heaves.”
“You go with the boys, Jim. I’ll stay here with Noah. We can catch up. It’s been a long time.”
He wasn’t going to hide his intention, even if all he wanted was to find out what was going on with the man who was a shadow of the vibrant person he had been in college. Guilt threatened to swamp him at the thought that this might all be his fault, before he gave himself a mental slap.This isn’t aboutyou, Jax!
“You don’t have to…” Noah began, but Jim interrupted.
“Please, you’d be doing me a favor if you let him stay with you. He hasn’t been away from us since he got here and I’m sure he needs a break fromthe boys.”
Jax laughed. “When have I ever complained about being with these boys? How about never!”
Jim rolled his eyes at his friend. “Precisely my point. You’re not likely to complain because you’re in protector mode right now, and you’ll do anything to wear them out so they won’t burn Annie out.” He glared at Jax. “Tell me I’m wrong,” hedared him.
Jax laughed again and Jim nodded. “Uh huh! Thought so.” Then he turned to Noah and added, “I’m sure you two will have a lot to talk about, both being musiciansand all.”
They finished up and walked down to the pier where the boat tour signups were located. Jim managed to get three seats on the boat that was getting ready to depart. They’d be out for a couple of hours, which was more than enough time for Jax to get to the bottom of whatever was going on with Noah. He grinned and waved to the boys as they shouted their goodbyes as though they were setting sail for theNew World.
“They’re hilarious,” Noah said, his eyes squinted against the bright sunshine. “How oldare they?”
“Eight.”
