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Chapter Thirteen
Charlie
I didn’t accept his hand because, well, I couldn’t coordinate my brain enough to take action. Swirling memories mixed up with the information that these guys had just laid down slammed me into a state of shock or something. I literally had no words, no movement, no ability to think beyond the fact that my father had said the same thing to me as these men had, except when Dad had said it, it had been a story, at bedtime—fictional, as in, never to become reality.
“She’d be trapped,” I muttered, only half believing my own words. Marked by three men, there’d be no escaping.
Of course, now I was second-guessing all of Dad’s actions, decisions, everything that he’d done to impact my life. He’d insisted on training that no female werewolf was ever expected to complete—honing my abilities to partially shift and exploring the range of my strength, my problem solving and strategies, my leadership skills. It was more than being a feminist or in favor of female empowerment. He’d pushed me to be better than the average female, better than the average male, even. He’d had expectations of me that seemed absurd and pointless. What I’d always assumed were his fanciful utopian ideas might have actually been his version of rebellion. Had he truly expected me to take over his clan when he passed? Had that been his intention all along…like, for real?
I wanted to shake my head until my brain shifted back into place, because it was obviously too scrambled to think clearly.
My wolf and my beast didn’t know what to do, either. Flee, fight? I was rooted in place, processing while every instinct I had went haywire.
My vision narrowed to a pinprick. My ears strained to hear the minute sounds of the giant house. Creaks and thumps of staff moving around in other rooms were like thunder. I knew there were many ways for me to escape the room I was in, but right now it was claustrophobic. My skin tingled, the first signal that fur might sprout from my limbs. My muscles ached to stretch and grow. I was riding a fine line between shifting, unsure what to do or how to handle this situation.
Levi lowered his hand. He looked defeated. I couldn’t blame him. I was practically half out of the door just because my world was tilting sideways, and I felt like I was going to slide right out of there. But seriously, how was I supposed to react to all this?
Prophecies? Beckoning these men into my dreams? It all sounded like destiny, fate, things I didn’t believe in—or maybe didn’t want to believe in.
It all sounded like a trap.
Johnny nudged Levi with his glass, and the ice cracking against the side was a thunderbolt to my sensitive ears.
I opened my mouth, but no words came out. How could these men want me to lead their pack when I’d already destroyed one? I’d tried this before and barely made it out alive. My werebeast had been out of control, and, as my uncle had put it, an abomination. “The result of her dad’s relentless training expectations,” he’d said. “No female should have that much power.”
“You can take some time to think about it,” Levi said after gulping down the rest of Johnny’s drink. “We’ll leave you alone.”
I shook my head. It was a lot to process, and yet I already knew my answer, because while my head was spinning, my gut wasn’t. My gut knew exactly what I needed to do. And the masters I’d trained with, while not always helpful in pushing me forward, had all demanded that I listen to my gut. And honestly, it hadn’t led me astray yet… Well, except for urging me to walk right into Sal’s office earlier today all pumped up and full of bravado. That had worked out just great, thank you very much!
They were all looking at me like they were expecting something.
I made them wait another minute as I sucked in quiet breaths, urging my beast and my wolf to chill out, then steadied myself.
“You’d step down as alpha?” I speared Kane with the question. I wasn’t convinced, not even close, but I was curious.
He lifted his head, straightened his spine. “That was always the plan.”
I found that so hard to believe. I’d never known a werewolf to willingly give up control, especially not one who looked like Kane. Built like a brick house, he was taller than his brothers—and that was saying something, because they all towered over me and I was not short. Even though he was wearing a suit, I knew Kane was cut like a bodybuilder. I could see his bulging muscles by the way his suit was tailored, fit to his frame like a second skin. I knew there was a lot going on under his clothes. Well, that, and if what Levi said was true, the man in my dreams, the one with smoldering amber eyes, was Kane, and that guy had abs for days and forearms to weep over. I thought about how, more than once, I’d licked my way along the deep grooves of his obliques, all the way to his—
Heat rushed over my chest and up my neck, a tsunami of fire, no doubt making me look guilty for my thoughts.
As if reading my mind, Kane’s eyelids hooded and his lips twitched. He puffed his chest a bit and I swore I caught a whiff of a familiar musk, triggering a cascade of sensations that all shot straight to my pussy.
I turned away from him only to find Johnny and his electric-steel eyes, then Levi with his hopeful, endless-ocean ones.
I was doomed…seriously. These men, literally the men of my dreams, were going to slay me in more ways than one.
“I’m not making any promises.” I’d have been lying if I said I didn’t want to see where this could go. “I’m not taking any of your marks.”
“Char—”
“No.” I cut Kane off before he could utter another word and ruin my growing resolve. “I don’t need to be marked to be alpha.” I raised my hand when both Levi and Johnny started to protest. “I know what it signals to the other clans, but I’m not willing to be entrapped. My father had hopes…” I struggled to say the words because it had always been his fantasy in my mind, not even close to coming into reality. A female alpha, yeah, right. “He thought I’d be alpha to his clan one day, and his plans never included me being marked.”
Levi stood down, his shoulders slumping.
“I do need to think…about…all this. I also don’t want to waste time.” I gave each man a separate glance. Maybe I was stalling, but I wanted to explore what each of these wolves had to offer. I needed to figure out their angle and what they thought they were going to get out of this. “I want to get to know each of you before I commit to anything.” I was talking about leadership, but I knew they’d think I was talking about bonding with them. I didn’t correct them. Better for them to believe I’d go along with their plans eventually. “I want to meet your pack, gauge their skills, their commitment. They’re rogues, right?”
Kane nodded. “They’re all free thinkers and don’t hold on to old-world beliefs. They’re hungry for change.”
