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Allee looked down at her hands, knowing she'd hurt Noah but not knowing what to say or do in response.
“I'm sorry,” she whispered, “I never meant to hurt you.” Tears fell from her eyes and landed silently on her laced fingers. Noah sighed, rubbing his hands over his face.
“Look, you've just unloaded a bombshell on me. I need time to process it all,” Noah got up from the couch, one hand reaching towards her before he shoved his hands in his pockets, his shoulders slumped in defeat. “I'm going to go home. I'll talk to you on Monday,” he murmured sadly, then turned and left.
As he closed the door behind him, she felt the dam of emotion release, and she was wracked with sobs. Piddle clambered into her lap, butting Allee's chin with her head, and Allee wrapped her arms around the cat, holding the cat to her chest.
Eventually, she lay down on the couch and cried herself to sleep.
Allee sat on the couch and watched the sky gradually brighten. Her eyes were dull with pain, and she still wore the same clothing she had changed into on Friday evening. Allee had not moved from the couch apart from getting up to use the toilet or feed Piddle. She had not eaten since Friday evening either, and her face was pale and drawn. Allee didn't think she'd be able to face her colleagues this Monday morning, and she knew that she'd break down if she saw Noah. So, she shambled her way into her home office to send Craig an email, telling him she wouldn't be in that day. She made her way back to the couch, wrapping herself back in the blanket, and waited for the disconnect in her heart to heal.
Several hours passed, and Piddle nuzzled Allee's arm, demanding food and attention. Allee moved slowly, allowing the blanket to slip off her body, and crawled off the couch. She moved like someone in a dream, filling Piddle's bowl with dry kibble, before sitting herself at the table, her head resting on the surface. She jumped slightly as the phone rang, but she made no move to answer it. Her answering machine clicked on.
“Sorry, I can't get to the phone right now,” she heard herself say. “Please leave a message after the tone.” After a moment, she heard Charlie's voice, filled with concern.
“Allee, are you there? Are you okay? Do you want me to come over tonight? If I don't hear back from you, I'm coming over!”
The machine clicked off, and Allee heaved a sigh. She had a feeling that even if she contacted Charlie, it wouldn't stop her from coming over, so she had best get herself cleaned up. Allee headed up the stairs to her bedroom, shed her clothing, and stumbled into the shower.
Half an hour later, Allee was washed and dressed. She filled the kettle and put it on to boil and then made herself some toast. Although her stomach revolted at the idea of food, Allee forced herself to eat, as she'd need the strength to face what was coming.
Noticing that there were three messages on her answer machine. She sat down to listen to them play; Charlie's message was first, then Craig had called, asking if she was okay, and when she thought she'd be back in the office. The last call had been a short message from Noah.
“Allee, I'm sorry. We need to talk. Let me know when you're ready.”
Allee brushed the now-familiar tears from her cheeks and started her machine back up. She had several emails from Cass and Gareth Pengelly, as well as one from her parents. There were also several emails from various people back at head office and five from her workplace that morning; one from Craig, one from Charlie, one from Darryl, one from Beth, and one from Noah.
Craig's email was along the same lines as his phone message. It simply asked her if she was ill, how much time off work she might need, and whether she might be able to do some of the administrative work from home. Charlie's also echoed her earlier message, although she elaborated to say that Noah was in a complete shit of a mood, had something happened between them, and what did Allee want her to bring for dinner. Darryl and Beth both emailed their concern, with Darryl adding an invite to his place for lunch the following Saturday and Beth asking if Allee would be interested in joining her for a girl's night out. Allee couldn't bring herself to read Noah's email just yet.
Allee responded to Darryl and Beth's emails first, telling them that she was fine, just a bit under the weather, and she'd thought it best to not spread her germs to the rest of them. She told Darryl that she'd love to come on the weekend, providing she was well enough and offered to bring dessert again. To Beth, she suggested including Charlie and Tania if Beth was happy to. Allee then responded to Craig, saying she was unsure how long she'd be away from the office but would be only too happy to deal with the correspondence and administrative work from home if he would send her any requests she needed to deal with. To Charlie, Allee simply wrote,
I'll see you tonight. Chinese would be good.
Allee plodded around the house for the rest of the day, tidying up the kitchen, running the dishwasher, and generally setting things right again. She even did a load of laundry, although the hamper was only half full, knowing she needed to keep herself occupied, otherwise she would dwell on what had occurred with Noah.
It was getting dark when Charlie buzzed to let Allee know she had arrived. Allee let her in and went into the kitchen to get plates and glasses out.
Charlie bustled in, plastic bags in hand, took one look at Allee.
“You look like shit,” Charlie said bluntly. “Sit down, lemme dish this up, and then spill.”
Allee sighed and sat at the table, waiting for Charlie to plate up their food. Although the food smelled delicious, Allee's stomach churned at the very thought of eating. Charlie set down a plate heaped with fried rice, beef and black bean, sweet and sour pork, and chicken with cashews in front of Allee and then added another plate holding a selection of sesame prawn toast, dim sims, and spring rolls to the middle of the table. She then sat down with her own plate, opened a bottle of coke, and poured some into each glass.
“Okay, what's going on? You never took a day off when I was a complete bitch to you, so it must be something pretty bad. So, what gives?” Charlie's eyes were glued to Allee, even as she began to eat, her fingers deftly manoeuvring the chopsticks around her plate. Allee swallowed a small mouthful here and there but mostly pushed her food around the plate.
“I told him,” she stated simply, her voice low and soft. “I told him everything, and then he left.”
Charlie froze, her hands mid-way to her mouth. The chopsticks, loaded with rice and beef, dipped towards her plate, and the food fell back with a splat.
“He left? You told him everything, and he left?” Charlie was incredulous. “Holy shit-balls, I know that you left a fair whack of stuff out when you told me what that prick had done to you, but even so, he left?” Allee nodded, her throat closing over with unshed tears. She swallowed painfully and put her chopsticks down with trembling fingers. “I never thought that Noah could be such an arse-hat!” Charlie was furious. “I mean, there you are, pouring your heart out, and he just up and leaves!”
Allee sighed. As hurt and unhappy as she was, she also knew that Noah had been blind-sided by her revelations.
“Maybe if you knew the full extent like he does now, you'd think differently. I left a fair bit out when I told you what I had gone through, and, well, you and I, we aren't working at having a romantic relationship either...” Allee let the sentence hang, unable to go any further.
Charlie sighed, her indignation cooling, “Still, he needs to talk to you.”
“Well, he did call today and leave a message... and he sent me an email as well.”
