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His nose scrunched. “No fae.”
“Why not?”
“Too mercurial.”
“Try not to use words in conversation that I need to look up.”
“Flighty. One day she loves pumpkin pie. The next time she visits, you bake pumpkin pie, and she tells you she dislikes the texture of pie crust.”
“Sounds like you have some experience.”
“A misspent youth.”
“Is there any other kind?” An idea occurred to me. “Hey, you should go to the funeral. I bet that’s a great way to meet someone in a small town.”
“The funeral of an assassin? Forgive me, but I don’t think that’s the kind of woman I want to date.”
“Not everyone there will be a professional killer.” At least I didn’t think so. “I’ll go with you.”
He arched his eyebrow.
“I can describe all the women, and you can tell me which one you’d like to meet.” Although it seemed to me the vampire didn’t need my intel. He was capable of identifying appearances without help.
Otto stared blankly at the board. “You would do that for me? Why?”
“Because it might be fun.”
“It might be disastrous like my last relationship.”
I shrugged. “There’s always that risk.”
He pondered the offer. “All right then. It’s a date.”
“Not between us. It’s a fake date to get you a real date.”
He smirked. “I’ve listened to many romantic comedies that start off in much the same way.”
I leaned forward. “Trust me, Otto. It’s never going to happen.”
“You’re right. It won’t.” He paused. “Mainly because I’m not remotely attracted to you.”
I scoffed. First Chief Garcia and now Otto? “You can’t be serious.”
“What? You think I should be attracted to you simply because you’re female and willing to come to my home?”
“No, I think you should be attracted to me because I’m hot.”
He burst into laughter. “I do enjoy your company, Lorelei. It’s a shame I don’t find you more attractive. We’d have a grand time together. You’d be amazed at what these fingers can do.”
“I don’t think so. I’ve watched you play piano.” I picked up my knight, ready to make my next move. “Too bad we’ll have to settle for chess.”
CHAPTER11
Otto was kind enough to loan me a designer dress for the funeral. I resisted the urge to ask why he had an entire closet filled with women’s dresses in different sizes.
“If you’re to be my wingman, you must dress appropriately to attract the right sort of woman. You can’t show up in a black T-shirt and dark denim.”
“But it’s my signature look.”
