Page 7 of Emotional Descent


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After a few months, they always decided I was not emotionally available. I functioned robotically in my life. Their words, not mine, and mostly that was true. I did the dates and bought them things. Showed up to fix flats or broken cabinets around their homes, but when it came to pouring my heart out, it never happened. It wouldn’t happen. No one would get that side of me again.

Once was enough and she’d fucked me over. I’d been fucked over twice actually because I’d loved my mother and she still packed her shit and left. I was eight but I understood exactly how little I’d meant to her when she pulled my arms from her, shoved me away, and slammed the door after she walked out. That was the last time I saw her and it ruined something in me.

Being raised by a father who was emotionally damaged after the love of his life left him hadn’t made things any easier. My brother and I weren’t allowed to acknowledge we were also affected by her leaving.

Our father didn’t acknowledge that she’d hurt him, but he acted on that hurt and shut off his own emotions.Be men, suck that shit up.My brother and I heard that so much it became ingrained. It pushed Ty to seek what he was missing from others. It taught me to live without it.

“Are you my therapist now?” I opened my eyes and turned my head to him. Ty was two years younger than me. We were thirty-six and thirty-four. He was the baby which made him sensitive about certain things and me pressing him about being in touch with his emotions was a sore spot. Ty was just as much an asshole as I tended to be but women were one of his weak spots. Emotions were another.

“I’m trying to save your ass from ending up like him but do what the fuck you do, Balor. It works.”

“Yeah it does,” I murmured, closing my eyes again but this time I saw her face. As quickly as I acknowledged the thoughts of Keiris, I pushed them away. “You want to take him tonight or tomorrow?” I questioned about Jordan, needing something else to focus on.

“Tomorrow. Let him sweat it out. I’ll reach out to Copeland and let him know to meet us in the morning. I have plans anyway.”

Of course you do.

“Aight, just call in the morning and I’ll meet you.”

“You want me to take care of him?”

“No, I’ll do it.” I sat up and glanced past my brother near the door. He smirked.

“Never mind, maybe I should handle it. You go. You already ruined the guy’s face.”

I chuckled and shrugged. “I told you what happened and Copeland won’t care. He’ll probably thank me since the guy ran.”

“Right, but the courts don’t like it. They’ve already warned us enough times.”

“Then you handle it. I’m heading home.” I lifted and rounded my desk, passing my brother on the way out before I stopped. “You know I just like giving you shit and all women are not the enemy.”

“They’re not, but I think you really believe they are.”

“I don’t.” I stared at him hard and he nodded stiffly. Neither of us said anything else about the lingering issues we harbored but as I headed to the door, I heard him talking to Jordan.

“It’s your lucky day, asshole. You get me and not my brother. You need to use the bathroom before I lock you in the cage?”

“You’re keeping me here?” Jordan sounded worried.

“Just for the night. Bathroom or no?”

“Fuck you.”

I chuckled and walked out to the sound of my brother punching Jordan. “I see why my brother fucked up your face.”

As soon as I stepped out into the dark, I glanced at the parking lot and decided to take my bike instead of the Charger my brother and I shared for our company, Quick Track. The ride was short but I appreciated the peace of being on my Tesi H2. It was always my first choice.

As soon as I parked in my garage, my phone was vibrating in my pocket. I glanced at the screen and hit ignore, not in the mood to deal with my father’s shit. But he called back twice more so I answered the third call.

“Yeah.”

My father didn’t respond right away. Our relationship was complicated. I loved him but I hated him too. Our mother had started the damage, but he’d finished it. Donald was never physically or even verbally abusive for that matter but he was cold, closed off, and hard on us. The way he treated Tynan and me made it impossible to love or respect the guy.

“I need you to come by the house.”

“I’m busy.”

“Not tonight, tomorrow.”

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