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I shook my head. “You never did.”
He chuckled. “Yeah, Gen, I did. And until you, I hadn’t cared. Then, things changed. Kye still saw you as one of the guys. I remember when I realized he hadn’t noticed how you had changed, grown up, become breathtaking. I felt like the luckiest guy in the world. For once, I didn’t have to stand back and watch Kye get what I wanted. There was no competition.”
He shook his head. “Wait. I’m making this all about us. Me. First, how is your dad?”
I had called Mom when I finally got out of bed this morning. She sounded happy. Dad had said several words today, and she had been helping to feed him.
“He is good, considering. He has a long road of recovery, but with Mom and me helping him, he will be fine.”
Bowie nodded, looking concerned. “You’re staying here for a while then?”
“I can’t leave them.”
“And school?”
I didn’t want to get angry because he was bringing up school when my dad had just had a stroke, but it was my first reaction.
I forced my voice to remain calm before answering him. “School can wait.”
He knew me well enough to know he’d asked the wrong thing. I wasn’t that good at masking my emotions anyway. And like Kye, I’d grown up with Bowie. He might not know I didn’t care for roses and that I loved macarons, but he did know how to read my face.
“Of course it can. I’m sorry I asked that. It was insensitive.”
“It’s okay,” I replied. “Come on. Let’s sit down.”
I led him to the sofa. It was strange to be in the living room of this house with Bowie. We had always hung out in the basement over here.
He didn’t let go of my hand as he looked directly into my eyes. “I’ve loved you most of my life. Even when we weren’t together, I measured every girl I dated against you, and they always failed. I hated that I did it. I won’t lie. Drove me crazy.” He let out a small laugh, then shook his head. “Then, you were there in front of me, like my subconscious had summoned you. It felt like someone had knocked the air from my lungs. I wouldn’t even let myself look at you. I even worried everyone around me could hear my heart slamming against my chest. No one else makes me feel like that, Gen. You’re it for me. And if I have to face Kye, accept your friendship with him to have you, I will. I do. It took me some calming down to realize that if there was something between the two of you, then it would have happened by now.”
I thought he’d already come to that conclusion. The words he’d hurled at me when he left my apartment said as much.
His eyes softened, and he looked guilty. “I said some hurtful things because I was scared. I was terrified of losing you to him. When I said them, it was what I had been hoping. I realized later, although I’d said them in a nasty way, it was the truth. The two of you are just friends, and I don’t think you want more with him. That was my jealousy talking.”
He had every right to be jealous. I’d not handled any of this the right way. I opened my mouth to respond when the door opened and Kye walked into the house. All words left me as I stared at him over Bowie’s shoulder. Kye’s gaze swung from me to Bowie, and he paused only briefly, then quickly covered the moment of shock on his face before he closed the door behind him.
Bowie let my hand go and stood up to face Kye. I hurried to do the same. This was not how I’d wanted to tell Kye about Bowie. I had hoped to explain this first. I had wanted to do it last night and then chickened out.
Kye rubbed his jaw as he stared at Bowie before looking back at me. “Damn, Baby Doll, you could have prepared me.”
Guilt, worry, fear, frustration swirled inside of me. All the things I had practiced in my head to say to Kye went poof. I couldn’t remember any of them. I felt like I had betrayed him, which was ridiculous. But I had lied to him in a way. By not telling him.
“She was putting it off. Worried about how you’d feel about us. That’s what our disagreement was about. Why I shut her out,” Bowie said when it was clear I wasn’t going to respond.
Kye tore his gaze off me to give Bowie a hard glare. “Is that what it was? You ignoring her. Refusing to answer her calls and texts. Making her cry. That was a disagreement?”
I had to speak before Bowie said the wrong thing. Forcing my feet to move, I stepped around Bowie. “Kye, he was right. He wanted me to tell you. He begged me to. I was … I don’t know. I was just unsure how you’d take it. With all our history, I was nervous, and I kept putting it off. I should have told you. I was going to so many times, and then I couldn’t say it. I got scared.”
