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Obviously, I’ve tucked the necklace and the bracelet underneath my uniform. But I can still feel them. They feel warm and special against my skin, and I try to picture the gift-giver. It’s a silly thing to daydream about, but you need something to fill your time.
There is one positive thing about the noise of the factory floor. It means that as long as one of the overseers isn’t right behind you, you can usually get away with talking to whoever’s next to you. For me, that’s Riya, who tightens the last bolt on the machines before I carry them to the next belt.
“You’re looking cheerful,” Riya says as I pick up my next one.
“You’re not,” I reply. She certainly isn’t. She looks like she’s biting her tongue about something that’s really upsetting her. Normally, that would worry me, too. When Riya gets upset about something, she’s usually right. But I’m still thinking about my mysterious lover in the woods.
I wonder what it is he sees in me. Does he just think I’m pretty? Or is there something else about me? But what? I’m just a human, aren’t I?
She doesn’t say anything. She focuses on her work harder, as if she’s trying to tune me out.
“What’s the matter?” I ask.
“You know what I’m worried about.”
She looks pointedly at the slight bulge in my sleeve where the bracelet is. That surprises me. I knew that Riya didn’t quite trust the gifts I was receiving, but I had no idea that she was taking it that seriously. After all, they’re just gifts, right?
But even as I think about it, I realize it’s not true. The gifts are important. They’re important to me, and I don’t know what I’d do if I found out they weren’t important to whoever’s been giving them. No, I agree with Riya that there’s more here than gifts. The difference is, the uncertainty excites me while it scares her.
“You’re really that worried about some gifts?” I instinctively check for the overseer. He’s about six stations down and not facing us. “It’s fine. Besides, it’s my business, not yours.”
“I know it’s your business,” Riya says. “I just worry about you.”
The concern in her voice is so genuine I can’t even pretend to be mad at her. I wish she weren’t worried about me, but she’s just trying to be a good friend.
“It’s not like he’s done anything to hurt me,” I tell her. “Why do you have to assume that just because someone cares about me, there’s something wrong with him?”
“That’s not what I’m saying,” Riya protests and stops short. It takes me a moment to realize that the overseer has turned around and is walking too close to us for comfort.
I know that’s not what Riya was saying. She’s my friend, and that was just me being defensive. But the fact is, I don’t want to have this conversation. I care about Riya, but whoever has been leaving me gifts fascinates me.
The hardest part is, I don’t know if I can explain what it is that I find so compelling about him, while I’m sure that Riya could make lots of reasonable points about why I should be careful and stay away from the forest.
The fact is, I don’t want to be persuaded that this stranger might be dangerous. Even if he is, I don’t care. It’s not a matter of logic. It’s a matter of the heart.
“Well, you don’t have to worry,” I tell her as soon as the overseer has gone far enough in the other direction. “I haven’t gotten any more gifts from him. Not since the last one I told you about.”
She looks surprised. “You haven’t?”
“And not for lack of trying,” I continue. “I’ve gone into the forest every evening. But there hasn’t been anything there. Or anyone. I guess he decided to leave off.”
“Well, that’s a surprise.” She thinks for a moment. “How do you feel about that?”
“I don’t know. Sad, I guess. Apparently, he didn’t love me as much as I thought he did.”
“That is the way it often goes with people who make big gestures out of nowhere like that,” Riya explains, taking on her mothering voice. “They see another girl or they just think of a more fun game and off they go.”
“Yeah. That makes sense.”
It doesn’t feel good to lie to my best friend. But then again, maybe it’s for the best. Riya won’t understand what’s happening to me. Heck, I don’t understand it, not really. Easier to just tell her what she expects to hear and get on with it.
“Are you still going out into the forest?” she asks suddenly.
“Yeah,” I admit.
She briefly looks up from her workstation. Her gaze is serious and just a little suspicious. Is she wondering whether I’m hiding something from her, or does she just think I’m still stuck on this guy even though he’s disappeared?
“Just be very careful. You never know what you might meet out there.”
