AllFreeNovel
Share Us
"Natasha…"
"Why did you do that to me?" she asked. "Why lie? You knew my feelings…you…I told you…you…"
The words couldn't leave her lips as she struggled to maintain her composure.
"I…"
The words didn't come out. What was I going to say? How was I going to defend myself?
"I was just a dumb, sheltered princess that you could easily trick into whatever weird thing you did was?" she asked.
"That was never my intention," I defended.
"Then what was your intention?!" She was yelling now, her body shaking, and she was on her feet.
I love you. I loved you at first sight. But I was jealous of my brother and the fact that you were in love with him. I stole his identity because I wanted to get close to you.As if I could tell her all that. It would sound like poppycock. Wait…why was I the one taking the blame?
"I met with Ethan, the real one. I realized what seemed so off," she continued. "His eyes, the way he speaks - it was just like medical school. He looked at me like he had already put up a barrier, shutting me out and protecting himself. I found it strange, that you…your Ethan didn't seem distant. I thought it was just my being assertive that finally worked out for me, only to find out that I couldn't be more wrong. I was just a piece for someone who didn't know what he wanted."
"Don't say that," I said. "Why am I taking the blame for this anyway? I'm not the one who kissed you out of the blue in Glen Allen that day. I'm not the one who forced you to…"
"Don't even try to run away from this or pin this on my head," she warned. "You were meant to at least tell me I had the wrong person I could have given up a long time ago."
"Easy for you to say," I said.
"Excuse me," she muttered.
Stop Ian.
"You make it look like I was the only one at fault, but I wasn't the one who was technically cheating on the person you were in love with," I continued.
Stop…what are you saying?
"What are you saying?" She asked the same question that was in my head.
"I'm saying if you were really interested in the persona I created, then why were you interested in my real identity?" I asked.
"You're right," she said as she looked at her feet. "I was stupid and at fault, but…"
When she lifted her face, I realized the horror of what I had just done. The tears she had fought desperately to hold back, had started to fall without restraint.
"Do you know," she said as she sniffled and wiped her nose against her wrist, "that it's not possible to be in love with two people at the same time?"
I didn't answer. I didn't know if I was allowed to answer. My words had brought her to ruin. I feared opening my mouth again, but I just kept silent, hoping things would get better.
"I thought I was crazy. How did I love Ethan? You even made me realize what I felt for him…the first time, was envy and admiration," she continued. "I found it strange…when I kissedhimin Glen Allen, my heart pounded in a way I didn't even think was possible. Then I saw you…just looking into your eyes, and the pounding was there again."
I swallowed hard. This was definitely not my day.
"You…whenEthantold me everything you said and thought about me," she continued. The tears seemed to have stopped but she hugged herself, a little shaky from the emotional turmoil. "My confusion grew. When we kissed, it only got worse. I didn't know what I felt anymore. I wanted to hear your voice, I wanted to go back to that carnival. I wanted to accidentally trip and kiss you. But I kept wondering, why did my heart not sway with Ethan? Why did it remain the same? And now I think I know the answer…"
"Natasha, I'm sorry," I apologized.
I didn't want her to say the words she was about to say.
"I was in love with the same person," she said with a forced laughter. "Can you imagine that? I was actually in love with both versions of you."
I squeezed my hands into a fist.
