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He should say no. He should do something. Something other than wrap his arms around her and pull her back against his body, kissing her again.
They were out in the open on his property, anyone could roll up. Except they wouldn’t. Because his boys were away for the summer, and everything was different now. Because he and Frankie were alone. Because she didn’t need to be here, but she was.
Because when everything had gone wrong in her life, he was the port she’d come to.
If he could be proud of something, maybe it should be that. But he wasn’t proud of much. He was just hard. Desperate.
Frankie was whimpering, rubbing her body against his. She was so short he knew that she wasn’t quite able to rub that needy place between her legs against his arousal. Knew that she wanted to. So he did the sensible thing. He gripped her thighs and lifted her up, wrapping her legs around him, and pinning her up against the side of the barn.
He kissed her neck, and she let her head fall back, panting as she rolled her hips forward.
“That’s a girl,” he said, only dimly aware of the words that were coming out of his mouth. “Good girl,” he said. “Get what you need.”
“Yes,” she whispered, pushing her fingers through his hair, and it felt so damned good. To be touched like this. To be touching Frankie like this. She was just... She was special. This girl.
And he cared about her. He wanted to make her feel good. In fact, he wanted it so much that he almost couldn’t think about his own needs. But only almost. If he wasn’t so damned driven to see to her pleasure, he might’ve come then and there. He was on a hair trigger. He hadn’t felt anything like this in so long. The striving, intense need to be with somebody.
The truth was, he had been married quite some time before his wife had died. He still wanted Anna. He wanted her every day of his life, but they had had a life and a mortgage and kids. They’d had those things more than they had a desperate need to tear each other’s clothes off. A good night’s sleep was more important than sex till sunrise. They had been in a different phase of life.
And this was so many things.
His first time with another woman. His first time touching someone in eight years.
The excitement of the new, sweet body underneath his hands. The excitement of being touched at all.
Damn. Goddamn. He moved his hands down to Frankie’s ass and ground her hard against him, moving his hips forward and making firm contact with that sensitive bud between her thighs. She was wearing a short dress, and it had ridden up, and he could see she had white panties on underneath. He was hungry for what was underneath those panties. The fabric was damp, and he growled, moving his hips in a circle. And then she gripped his shoulders, a hoarse cry escaping her mouth.
“Oh. Walker,” she said, her nails digging into his shoulders.
She was shaking. Trembling, and he realized she was coming apart in his arms. He realized she was coming.
He watched her face, watched as her eyes shadowed with pleasure. As everything centered on this moment. On her.
He was the first man to ever see her have an orgasm, he realized. The first man to ever give her one.
That had been true for him before. He and Anna had been each other’s first and only. But this was different. He was older now, and there were very few novelties left in his life. Frankie wasn’t a high school virgin. Where others had tried, he’d succeeded. It felt like a damned miracle. She wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face just there next to his jaw, kissing him. “Oh wow,” she said.
“Yeah,” he said.
He didn’t quite know what to do. She was curled around him like a spider monkey, and what he wanted to do was strip her naked and have her. But she was full on shaking now, and he was so close to the edge he knew that if he took her now...
First of all, he didn’t have any protection. He hadn’t needed it for too long.
“Frankie, there’s some stuff I’ve gotta...”
“No,” she said, tightening her hold on him. “Don’t. Please don’t leave me.”
“That’s not what I meant. I wasn’t going to. I swear. I just... I haven’t needed condoms in a long time. And we’re going to need some.”
She looked up at him, looking dazed, full of wonder. “Oh. You mean you want to...”
Heshouldn’t. He should let this be it. He should call it good. He could see that she was surprised he wasn’t. That would be the honorable thing, after all. But the truth was, he was too selfish to turn back. He could not go back to his room and work this out on his own. It had been too many years of that. He had denied himself so totally, so completely, that he hadn’t even been touched by a woman in eight years. He would love to be that selfless. To have given Frankie her orgasm, and to leave it at that.
He wasn’t that selfless. Not now. Not anymore. He needed her. He just fucking did.
“Yeah, I can see why you should think that. Because I should tell you I’m too old for you. I should tell you that I’m taking advantage of you. And that it’s wrong. That you should go find somebody closer to your own age. Somebody a little less messed up. But I can’t. I just... I need you.”
She bit her lip, swollen from kissing him.
