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I nod.
“Well, there you go. His own son couldn’t stand him, and then he finds out because of him, a man took his life. I’d be depressed too. Not to mention, he just spent years in prison.”
Felicity is getting upset with me. I understand why. She doesn’t know the whole story, and right now I don’t have time to explain it all, but still I listen to her.
“One thing my past has taught me. Always treat people like it might be the last time you see them. Don’t leave anything on the table. Regrets, especially when it comes to losing someone, aren’t easy. Depression can overwhelm you, and sometimes take you to a very dark spot.”
My head is in my hands, just trying to come to terms with everything that has happened. If Nathan would have never shown me that letter then I wouldn’t have any doubts. Hell, my uncle wouldn’t have called me about my father’s death, and I could have been oblivious. Instead, I did read the damn letter, and it made me question how I’ve been acting. Now, I’ll never know because he is dead. He can’t answer any of my questions. So, I’m stuck here in limbo, just dealing with it all.
Her soft palm lands on my arm. “Listen, don’t let it eat you up. Regret and rage are dark emotions. Believe I know.”
There is so much to learn about Felicity. Something tells me she has a dark past too. Most people would flinch or shy away from talking about things like this, and yet here she is. Sitting next to me, trying to comfort me with sound advice.
I turn to look at her. “You might not realize it, but this helped. Seeing you and hearing you talk some sense into me.” My lips caress hers, but just short and sweet.
As our lips part, the doorbell rings, and we look at each other.
“I’ll get it,” Felicity says.
When she opens the door, I can’t see past her, but it’s Nathan’s voice. “Is he here?”
She moves to the side and his eyes land on mine. “Can I come in?”
I nod, and Felicity excuses herself.
Nathan steps in the house and shuts the door behind himself, but doesn’t take another step. His hands are in his pockets and he’s not even looking my way. “So, I was worried when you didn’t show up for work today.”
I shift on the couch.
“You deserved to read that letter just as much as I did. If anything, you needed to see how your father felt about you. And I know, it was fucking awful of me not to mention the history between our fathers, but it wouldn’t have a changed a damn thing.”
He stands with one arm clasping the other at the elbow. His eyes staring at the floor.
Nathan didn’t know my father was going to take his life, so I can’t take out my anger on him. Sure, I’m livid he never once mentioned my father in the years we have worked together, but it’s nice that he gave me a chance. Anyone else would have written me off the second they heard my last name. Especially after what my father did to his. Instead, he didn’t let that affect our friendship.
“I don’t know how you can stand to look at me after your father’s death. One thing I can say. I’m nothing like my father. I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to prove that to Grapevine. The Navaldi name needs to be polished. It’s up to me to do that.”
Nathan’s head perks up. “You’re already doing that. This town has come a long way. Being a firefighter, a pillar in the community, everyone sees your effort. None of them think about your father anymore.”
My mouth pinches tight. “Good. They won’t have to worry about him any longer.”
His head ticks to the side. “What do you mean by that?”
“After reading your letter, I found out that he killed himself. Uncle said he couldn’t take it anymore.”
Nathan’s hand cups his mouth. “I didn’t want him to do that. Last night I sat down and wrote him back. My father taught me a lot of things, but one of the best ones was when to forgive. In his letter, he expressed remorse for what he did. I didn’t want him walking around with that baggage on his shoulders.”
How am I supposed to respond to that? If my father would have held up just a couple more days, he would have received the letter from Nathan and maybe he would have lived. But he didn’t. He chose to take his own life and I’m not sure anything would have talked him out of it. Depression is a dark road.
“Let’s put this aside. No more secrets, though. Okay?” I ask.
He nods and shakes my head. “Never again, bro.”
17
FELICITY
For all intents and purposes, I want to call into work, but my work ethic is better than that. Theo is struggling and as much as I want to help him through it, work can’t come second right now. Two of the girls are on vacation and that would leave Jennifer to man the phones by herself. It would be unethical of me to think she could help all the callers in an appropriate time by herself. So, I take a deep breath and walk inside.
