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And then Merlin spoke and my self-righteousness dissolved.
“Arthur has taken up collecting captives,” Merlin began, her voice tight. She did not like to speak of this then. “He keeps the tributes in a special part of the castle. Mostly women, of course.” She cleared her throat. “Those who are favored in his court and even some of the soldiers who have stood out in battle may... access the collection.”
“Access it?” My belly heaved. “What the fuck does that mean? Is it a library?”
“Use your vivid imagination, Lancelet,” Merlin said wearily. “I shan’t be elaborating. As long as the captives are returned to the collection in mostly one piece, anything is permitted.”
I was revolted. “Prisoners? These people are all prisoners?”
In the past, in times of war, captives were relatively well-treated. There were rules for such things, even in war.
But Arthur had set the rules aside.
“From Tintagel and Lyonesse mostly, yes. Our former allies. Our former friends.” Merlin’s voice was bitter. “As for his own court, Arthur has not restrained his sensuous evils there either. He has formed a new circle of advisors to serve him. Only men. He demands the wives and daughters of all of the men who wish entrance to this elite group serve him as well. However he pleases.”
“Such a man as this does not deserve to live,” I growled, feeling the rage building in my heart. I stoked the rage. Let it grow. Let it build. Let it burn. Perhaps I might eventually hate Arthur more than I hated myself. “Let me leave here. Let me kill him.”
“We do not even know precisely where he is right now,” Merlin said. “I believe he has left Camelot to inspect the troops on one of the frontlines. But I admire your... spirit.”
She stood up and stretched. “I think that is enough for now. It is all I can manage for one night. I will see you in the morning, Lancelet. But now do see? There is something worth living for. Even if it is only a shallow desire for vengeance. We all feel it. Even I.”
“I will remember,” I promised her. “I will not make you recount this all again. Your words are burned in my mind.”
She smiled at me–a smile so full of love it reminded me with a pang of my own mother. Was she still safe in Camelot?
“My family,” I choked out quickly before Merlin could leave.
“They are well,” she assured me. “Your parents have taken the children to your grandparents in the country.” She hesitated. “We have sent a message to them, letting them know you are well. We will speak more of them in the morning, if you like.”
And then she stepped out into the hall, closing the door behind her and leaving me all alone once more.
THE END
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