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The nurse answered all Ethel’s questions. Turns out she is from Forsyth county and her people are Moravians who have been here for generations. That seemed to be respectable enough for Ethel. She said, “I don’t know any Moravians, but I understand you are religious folk. I like that. I am not so religious anymore, but it’s good for a nurse to be.”
The nurse stepped back saying, “Nice to meet you, Ethel. Your sister is going to need lots of rest to heal. When she gets sleepy, let her have peace and quiet. Okay?”
After the nurse left, I told Ethel I would let her know when I needed a nap, but right now, I wanted to talk. Being in this hospital bed had given me some time to think. I said to her, “I am glad you are here. We have a lot to talk about.”
Then I started and hardly stopped to take a breath or a sip of water. Ethel interrupted from time to time.
I was reading a book with Suzy recently.
Ethel stopped me almost mid-sentence. “Oh, by the way George is going to be at your house when the school bus comes. He will have them drop off Marie too and bring both girls over to our house until you can come home.”
I knew they would get things arranged for me, and said, “Thanks to you and George for doing that.”
I brought her back to what I wanted to talk to her about. The story book I was reading was The Little Engine That Could. It’s a child’s book, but I kept thinking it related well to the Nash Girls. I told Ethel if she hadn’t read it to Marie, she could borrow it from my house. I told her not to laugh because I wanted her to read a children’s book. Ethel snickered when I told her the author’s name was Watty Piper. She said that was a name he should have changed before writing a book.
I ignored that and went on with what I was trying to explain to her. I told her the story was one that makes children feel hopeful—to believe in themselves. It also made me feel hopeful and thankful.
The story is about a happy train engine pulling cars full of fun things for children. The engine’s job is to deliver the toys, dolls, teddy bears, healthy food, and many other things to children on the other side of the mountain. Then one day the train broke down and couldn’t make it over the mountain. He knew without the good things he was carrying for girls and boys, well, they would have no toys to play with and no wholesome food to eat. He could not get over the mountain. Another engine came to help him, then another and another. Once they all worked together chanting, “I think I can – I think I can – I think I can,” they did it. They got to the other side of the mountain.
I could see Ethel was not taking this seriously and not getting my point. Okay, it was sounding a little silly as I was telling it. We both started laughing and could not stop. If felt like a Nash sister moment.
Right then lunch was delivered, so we had to act grown-up. Ethel inspected the food and said, “That looks pretty healthy, Dianne. Tomorrow I will bring you country ham and red-eye gravy. Maybe I’ll throw in some collards. We have to keep feeding you what your body is used to. This stuff might make you sick.” We laughed again.
After lunch, I was surprised to find I needed a nap. When I woke, Ethel was by my bed. She said that while I was “out like a light” she went to a find a telephone to update George. I started right back on the point I wanted to make. I grabbed her hand and said, “Ethel, here is the point of me telling you about that book. The little train engine needed help to get over the mountain. That is true of us. Suzy and I have needed help, but we don’t always like to ask for it. It has been over a year since Joe died in that accident at the mill. You know this has not been an easy year for Suzy and me. Neither of us is doing well without him. This load that we carry seems too large.
“It just happened that Suzy brought that book home from school. The youngest children were reading it. She and I read it together one night a few weeks ago. The first time we read it, we cried like babies about those poor children across the mountain. Suzy said to me, ‘We would help wouldn’t we, Momma? Even though we don’t have Papa and we don’t have an engine, we would help.’
“It struck me like lightning. Of course, we would! We would stick together. We have always gotten through things that were hard. She and I have read that book every night before bed. It is our reminder that we think we can get through this and whatever else comes. Then I realized that the Nash sisters do the same thing. We pull together when it counts, and we think we can handle anything that comes along.
“I began thinking about all the men in our lives. They don’t seem to stay long, but they bring important things to us. Joe was the best thing that ever happened to me. He taught me how to love, reminded me to be kind, and to organize my life. Joe is the one that talked, all the time, about making a plan and sticking to it. It seemed when he died, there was no need for a plan. I would just let life happen.
“Ethel, you have good men in your life. Even though you and Frank never worked it out between you, he has given you so much. Even without being able to marry you, stay with you, or be in Marie’s life, he provided for you. I know he broke your heart. But you learned to move on. Ethel, you are the strongest of all of us— although you were not Momma’s favorite—that was me.” We both smiled.
“Then Larry came along. What an interesting man! He thought you were the bee’s knees! You wanted to marry him real quick at the court house. I knew getting married then would be too soon. It seemed like a rebound from Frank. Then the crash of ’29 happened. I’m not telling you anything you don’t know, but I want to say this part. It is important. Larry had been doing well in his insurance sales work, but, as you told us, he did not do well when the stock market crashed. He wanted to provide for you and Marie, and I could tell he loved you. But remember he left. He was sincere about coming back when he made enough money. He said he was heading out to Alabama.”
Ethel put her hand on my arm to interrupt. “Yeah, Larry was an interesting man. He had worldly ideas. He always wanted to be something more. He told me getting married would give me and Marie the security we needed. Later he disappeared. Larry figured he could build another office just like he did in Atlanta. He said Alabama was the right place because those people were hard working and needed insurance. They didn’t lose money in the crash because they didn’t use banks and had no money in the stock market. It all seemed to make sense to me. I never promised to go with him. Or counted on him coming back. That way I would not be disappointed. I just told him ‘I’ll see you around maybe.’”
“Yes, I remember, Ethel. What did Larry bring you? We can talk more about this later, but hear me out. I think he brought you a view of what you could be. You managed without Frank because you were mad at him. With Larry you became an independent woman because you found out you could. And you were good at it. Larry traveled so much, you learned more about the world out there. Since he was not always around, you stopped depending on him and started liking who you were. You began to be not only a mom but also a farm owner and business woman. Marie was not just a duty. She was a gift from God. Okay that might be a little too sappy. But this is the time in your life you began to understand that.”
Ethel piped in, “I thank goodness for Larry, mainly because he didn’t stay long. And maybe I will see him again.”
“Then in 1934 when George Fox stepped off a wagon at home asking for a job, you said “yes.” Not only did you need help with the house, but you needed a family. I am not sure you see this, but George is the one who has shown Marie what a papa could be,” I reminded her.
Ethel and I talked for the two days I was at Richardson Memorial Hospital about the men in our lives. Us growing up without a papa. How strong our momma was to raise four girls by herself. The challenges of life in general and how we are doing just fine. We talked about our daughters and how close they are. The Nash girls never had any cousins. We just had each other. Ethel and I agreed that Suzy and Marie having each other was adding to their happiness. The longest part of our continued conversation was that men were nice to have around when they were good to us, but they were not necessary for surviving.
Ethel said it best. “We women have all the smarts we need to accomplish anything we want.” Now we need to be smart enough to know when to ask for help.
1940
Nash Sisters
The Nash Round-Robin Letters
Things are really different for the Nash family. The Nash Round-Robin letters go to fewer sisters now. But we still write as a journal or history of the family. I share about the visits from Frank. Caroline uses humor to talk about her life at the insane asylum. Annie shines a light on living in D.C. and, of course, on politics.
To the Nash Women that are left to read my letter – October 4, 1940
What a year this has been! I think I need everyone’s pages to get through telling you all that is happening to me and Marie. It seems like forever since we were in the same room together, but that is the way our life is now. Thank you, Annie, for coming down for Dianne’s funeral and helping me organize her property.
