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Chapter 20
My hands were jittery as I walked into the library. I couldn’t keep still, and I was almost certain everyone could see my knocking knees. I stared at the door ahead of me, not wanting to see the Dean on the other side but knowing that it was going to happen in the next five minutes whether I wanted it to or not.
Breathing in and out, I tried to smile, hoping that I wouldn't give away just how nervous I was. It felt like I'd eaten rocks, and my stomach was rolling just thinking about what this conversation was going to be about. Deep down, I knew. I was having trouble admitting it to myself, but I knew he’d somehow found something out, and I was going to be blamed.
Biting my lip, I thought about this morning and guilt coursed through my bones. I'd lied to Tanner. I told him I thought they might ask me to tutor a new student. I already knew that wasn’t the case.
I knew exactly what they wanted to talk to me about, and the implications it would have on him, on Hazel, on Alex… on me. Would they let me stay here? I’d be lucky if I’m just suspended and not expelled, but how would that look?
Tears pooled in my eyes, and I shook my head in a desperate attempt to stop myself from crying in front of everyone in the library.
Get a grip, Aster.
Clutching my books to my chest tightly, I paced around the foyer, rehearsing what I was going to say in defense. The only problem was that nothing I said made it sound any better.
“Aster,” Ralph cooed as he walked past the small space on the way to his desk. I silently cursed him, wishing he hadn't been there to see this. Knowing him and his propensity to over-share, I could see this meeting getting out when I didn’t want it to. “How are you?” He rushed to my side and placed his hand on my arm and gently stroked my sweater with his thumb.
He was being…nice, and it was confusing the hell out of me. I glared down at his hand with my usual disdain. “I'm fine. What's wrong.”
“Fine?” He choked out. “I guess what I'm hearing around the library isn't true, then?”
I gulped, the ringing in my ears becoming deafening.
Did he know?
How could he?
I don’t even know, so if he’d heard something, then it meant that I’d been set up, surely? Ralph was well connected, but he wouldn’t know about this.
“What have you heard?” I shouldn't have bothered asking, but at least I could prepare myself for the worst if I knew what was going to go down.
He blew out a breath, leaning in close so he could whisper. “I heard you were doing some shady shit to get better grades for your tutoring clients.”
I took a sharp breath. My whole body felt shaky and there was a nagging sensation in my stomach that made me want to collapse on the floor and hide.
“Oh?”
I feigned ignorance because what the fuck was I supposed to do? If I owned up to it, I'd be screwed.
“Yeah,” he replied, and I closed my eyes, waiting for the inevitable. For him to tell me intricate details of my crimes that I wouldn’t be able to deny. That was why the Dean wanted to speak to me, after all.
“So it's true that you wrote papers for your students and had an affair with Professor Murphy to get better grades?” His smile almost looked amused, as though he was happy to be the first one to find this information out.
“What?” I spat out, completely confused. “Professor Murphy? I haveneverhad an affair with Professor Murphy. He's in his fifties and has a family.”
Ralph looked at me, and a slow, wry smile formed on his lips. “You sure? Because it sounds kind of hot. The nerdy, unknowingly hot chick bangs the good-looking professor while also dating the star quarterback and a hockey player.” He looked to the side. “Come to think of it, I’m pretty sure I watched a porn with that exact same premise when I was younger. I’m also pretty sure that was when I realized I was gay.”
“I am not sleeping with Professor Murphy.” Even saying it felt like I was choking on salt because of all the things that I was expecting to hear, this was not one of them.
“Are you sure?” He teased. “Because the more I think about it, the more I think it makes sense. How else would you explain Tanner going from an F to a B in his class?” The conclusion stung because it wasn't the truth. Tanner worked his ass off and didn’t deserve those accusations.
“How did you know that?”
“Transcripts. They come through to the tutoring office. It helps Kinsey evaluate how well the program is working.”
“You can’t just go around making accusations like that. Especially about Tanner. He worked damn hard for that grade.”
“But you still haven’t denied helping him.”
