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Besides, this wasn’t the time for fantasies. I needed to focus on helping Hil through this difficult time. Despite their complicated relationship, I knew how much he loved his father. Yes, his father had locked him away in their penthouse never allowing Hil to have a social life outside of me. But that wasn’t because his father was a monster. They have a dangerous life.
And, it wasn’t like his father was wrong. The one time Hil escaped his family’s protection, he ended up being kidnapped by one of his father’s rivals. Remy and Hil’s boyfriend, Cali, had had to rescue him. The guy shot Cali in exchange for letting Hil go. Cali was alright, but still. Hil and Remy lived in a crazy world and his father had had to protect Hil from it.
On the other hand, when it became clear that Hil was gay, his incredibly scary father accepted him for who he was. Hil told me that never once did his father make him feel bad for who he was attracted to. Hell, his parents even introduced the two of us and it wasn’t like anyone ever mistook me for straight.
So, despite everything, Hil’s father had been a way better dad than mine had ever been. And now his father was gone. My heart ached for him.
Taking a deep breath, I promised myself to set aside any feelings I had for Remy and focus on being there for Hil in the coming weeks. And as the tingles I always got from thinking of Remy subsided, I again picked up my phone.
I wasn’t sure why I was nervous, but dialing Hil’s number, my heart pounded. When the call connected, Hil’s voice was shaky.
“Hey, Dillon.”
“Hey, Hil… I just heard about your father.”
There was a slight pause. “Really? How?”
“Remy just told me,” I said wanting so badly to share how amazing it was that he had.
“Oh. Yeah.”
“I’m so sorry, Hil. How are you doing?” I said wishing I could reach through the phone and hug him.
“It’s just so hard to accept that he’s gone.”
“I can’t even imagine. But I’m here for you, okay? Whatever you need, I’ll be there.”
Hil sighed, his voice cracking ever so slightly. “I appreciate that. I told Remy I wanted to handle the funeral.”
“Wow, that’s a lot.”
“Yeah, but I told Cali I was planning to and he asked if he could help me with it. So, I’ll be leaning on him for most things.”
“That’s great.”
“Yeah,” he said followed by a pause.
“What is it?”
“There is something you can help me with, though.”
“Of course! Anything. Just tell me when and where.”
The next day, Hil and I found ourselves in a boutique urn store. I didn’t even know there wasn’t such a thing. But there was and here we were.
The place exuded a somber elegance, with soft lighting casting a warm glow on the polished, hand-painted vessels. Being there, shopping for the last resting place of Hil’s father, felt surreal. It was just for the significance of it, it was also for the price tags.
With all due respect, urns were just vases with tops. How could one cost $22,000? Sure, it was marble with adorned gold filigree… whatever that was. But I could barely afford the bus I took here.
As we drifted through the aisles browsing the diamond urn collection, the topic of our conversation shifted from his father to Remy. I wasn’t the one who had changed it. But I wasn’t about to pass up on an opportunity to add material to my spank-box… when such a thing again became appropriate to do… to the thought of your best friend’s brother.
“I think I’ve come to peace with Father liking Remy best. I mean, I get it. He has my father’s need to take care of everyone. He even had it as a kid.
“There were times when we were growing up that he would do the worst big brother crap to me. But if you asked who I thought would protect me if something bad happened, it wouldn’t be a question. It would be him.”
I nodded, understanding how much Remy meant to Hil. “He’s always been there for you, hasn’t he?”
“Yeah, but at the same time, I can’t help but worry about him.”
