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“She’s gonna love you. Seriously. I know it.” He hugged Artie’s neck. “Just like I do, baby.”
“I love you, Mac.”
“I love you too.”
Artie grinned, and then he laughed suddenly.
Mac narrowed his eyes. “Why are you laughing like that?”
“Just thinkin’ of all the closets in the world, I happened to pop out of the one with a sexy daddy who took one look at me and said, yeah, I wanna fuck that.” Artie’s grin grew.
Mac couldn’t stop the bark of laughter erupting out of him. “Of all the monsters in the world, I got a really hot one.” He smirked. “Guess I just never knew you were exactly what I wanted. Some people realize they’re gay late in life. Some people realize they’re gay for monsters.”
“Well, I’m just glad you’re gay for me.” Artie kissed him sweetly.
“Mm.” Mac kissed him back, cupping his cheek. “Extremely gay for you.”
“You ready for your romantic dinner now?” Artie asked. “Are you gonna be able to keep your hands to yourself so I can seduce you with a sexy meal?”
“Yes to the first, strong maybe to the second.” Mac winked. “Did work up an appetite though, so I’ll try.”
“I believe in you,” Artie teased.
“Come on, big boy.” Mac smacked Artie’s hip as he got up. He grabbed his robe before leading the way down the hallway, and he had to step around the busted lamp.
Artie paused to pick it up, trying to fix the crooked shade to no avail. He cringed and gave up, and the lamp fell back off the table again. “I swear I’ll fix that thing.”
“I’m not worried about it.” Mac chuckled as he headed to the kitchen. “The ex bought it anyway.”
“Oh, well. Fuck it then!” Artie laughed.
“You want a beer, chef?” Mac opened the fridge.
“I would love one, babe.” Artie was at the pantry, pulling out the dry ingredients for dinner.
Mac grabbed them each a beer, and he laughed when he saw Artie had put on a pink frilly apron.
“I’m guessing this was the ex’s too?” Artie teased.
“Oh no, that’s mine,” Mac said seriously. He popped the tops off the beers using the side of the counter, and then he offered one to Artie. “Em insisted on it.”
“Well, it’s mine now.” Artie cackled as he accepted the beer, the bottle comically small in his huge hand. He took a dainty sip. “Thank you, baby.”
Mac hopped on the counter near the stove, watching Artie gather more ingredients out of the fridge, including ricotta cheese and an egg. He knew Artie was making a ziti because of the pasta and the cans of tomatoes and sauce, and he asked, “What can I do to help?”
“You, sir, can sit right there and look sexy.” Artie used his claws to open the tomatoes and tomato paste, and then he dumped them together in the big pot. “The sauce takes the longest ’cause it has to cook down, so we’ll go ahead and get that goin’ first.” He knew his way around the kitchen well, humming as he added salt, pepper, and crushed some fresh garlic to add in. “Once that’s doin’ its thing, we’ll make the squishy cheese stuff.”
“The filling?”
“Yeah, that stuff.”
“It sounds delicious.” Mac took a sip of his beer. “Where did you learn to cook like this?”
“You mean, where did I learn such advanced culinary terms assquishy cheese stuff?”
Mac laughed. “Hey, you can cook your ass off.”
“Well, thank you.” Artie grinned. “I guess it was just practice. One of my best friends growin’ up, guy named Ret, was obsessed with human cuisine. He used to sneak into people’s houses just to watch their TV so he could see cooking shows.”
