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“What?”
“You’re still hung up on him.” That was one way to put it. “I get it, he was your first love.”
My first, my last, and everything in between.
“It’s in the past.” I lied through my teeth. Lying was not something that came natural to me, like it did for everyone else in my family, and I didn’t feel comfortable doing it, but for Salvatore, I’ve done it over and over again. So much so, it became habit.
“I’m just saying that I understand. He was familiar. I imagine it’s hard moving on to date someone else, but at some point, you’ll have to do it.”
“Rebecca, stop!” I didn’t mean to snap at her, it just happened. “I’m not going to…”
“Oh, Grazia.”
“Don’t look at me like that. You lived with your grandparents for years, right down the street from us. You knew Giovani all your life. You loved him since you were in the third grade. Could you move on from that?”
She weighted the question a long time before answering. “No.”
“Then don’t ask me to.” My eyes drifted away. “Just because I’m not with him, doesn’t mean I have to be with anyone else.”
“Grazia, but that’s terribly sad.”
“Yeah, well, it’s the lifeBabboand Adrian Fiori decided for us.”
“Salvatore didn’t fight for you.” It wasn’t a question, but a statement, and a completely wrong one too.
“Rebecca, I really don’t want to talk about this.” The wound in my heart was still fresh, still bleeding, and this discussion was not helping one bit. How could I begin to heal when reminders of Salvatore were present at every corner?
“All I’m saying,mia sorella[10], is that it’s not fair for you to nurse a broken heart while the Fiori boy is living his life.”
Rebecca has memories of a young Salvatore – a taciturn prince waiting for his crown, not paying much thought to things that bothered him, but he was different now. Salvatore wasn’t a stranger to fights and sure as hell he was noboy.
“My heart is no one’s business but my own, and so is Salvatore Fiori. Please, do not worry for me, Becca.”
“It’s hard not to, Grazia. Don’t get mad at me, please.”
“I’m not mad, but Salvatore is…” she had no idea how complicated things were between him and I, “the engagement is a sensitive subject and I don’t like thinking about it.”
“I understand that.” She cracks open a bottle of Aqua Panna and poured it over ice and lime slices. “Giovani can’t help but be a little bit concerned about you, and I don’t blame him. He loves all his brothers, but you, Grazia? You’re his little sister.”
It was a reflex, I didn’t mean to, but my palm smashed on the table, making all the crockery rattle. Rebecca was taken aback by my gesture and so was I.
“I’m sorry, Becca, I didn’t mean to do that, but it’s infuriating. Giovani’s worry is not welcomed when the arrangement between Salvatore and I is concerned. He is my eldest brother,Babbo’sheir, and he stood there and didn’t say a word while a fight between two stubborn, old men has ripped the only future I have ever known away from me.”
“Grazia, that’s not fair. Gio could never…”
“…go against our father’s wishes.” I finished her sentence. That was the credo in the Caputo family. We were united, we were powerful, we respected theDon, but just once I wished for my brothers to stand up and take my side instead.
That morning when I was told the betrothal was broken – an engagement that I’ve carried with me since birth – I’d asked them to say something, but instead,Babbohad my brothers hold me still whilst he took my ring off. It was the one thing I could never forgive them for, not that I have ever said a word about it.
Giovani sat with me for a week after that day, comforted me while I was nursing a broken heart. He took my side the only way he knew how, but it wasn’t enough.
“Gio just wants you to be happy.” Rebecca reinforced her argument. “And so do I.”
“I know,sorella, and I love you both for it, but I am content with what I have. I’m thinking of trying out for a ballet academy.”
Picking up on the fact that I really wanted to move on from that subject, Rebecca followed.
“A new school?”
