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This version of Chiara, the married woman who was so calm and vulnerable, was foreign to me. The girl I knew was explosive and fierce; she was always headstrong and snapping at everyone. The girl I knew tried to set fire to my brother’s house when he broke up with her. She was grieving now, yes, but there was also something else that had changed, something in her eyes and I couldn’t tell if it was a good or a bad thing.
I walked away from her and pulled out a few things from the fridge. Salvatore was my priority and I only had a few more minutes to spend with him. I said goodbye to Chiara before going back upstairs, knowing there was a chance I won’t be seeing her again for a long time.
I found Salvatore awake. He was still in bed, staring at the door and when I walked in, he exhaled deeply and his shoulders slumped.
“I thought you left.”
“Not yet, but soon, Sasa.”
“I know. I have so many things to take care of, I wouldn’t even have time for you.”
I put the panini I made for him in his hands and he looked at me.
“You have to eat, Salvatore.”
“Thank you, Grazi, but I’m not hungry.”
“Youhaveto. Remember whenMammina[25]died and I almost got sick because I refused to eat? I don’t want that to happen to you.”
“Fine. I’ll eat and then take you home.”
“Chiara said that Pietro has everything covered. Don’t worry about me.” I sat next to him and put my head on his shoulder. “We won’t see each other for a while.”
“Not for long.”
“Salvatore, we can’t fool around anymore. Things have changed.”
“Nothing between us changed, Grazi.”
“We’re not just some kids. You’reDonnow, theCapo de Tutti Capiof a family that has sworn to never mix with my blood again and I might be just the daughter of Fabiano Caputo, but I’m his blood no less.”
“I don’t care about that.”
“Are you going to make peace with my father? Apologize for what Adrian did?”
Salvatore turned into stone.
“I have nothing to apologize for.”
“What does that mean?” He stayed silent. “Adrian said something last night, about your mother. What happened, Salvatore?”
I’ve never asked because I wasn’t supposed to. What happened that night when Adrian stormed intoBabbo’soffice was never discussed – never explained – and I never spoke of it again. I was raised to believe my father’s words were heavier than the law, so I’ve never dared to question him when he said his friend had ruined our family bond. Now? Now I had a crushing doubt on my chest.
I was haunted by Adrian’s empty eyes when he spoke to Salvatore about his mother. The way he said those words, like he was ready to die and meet with her again, have shaken my core and I couldn’t stop the echo in my ears ever since. But where did my father come in? What part did he play in that gripping pain I saw on Adrian?
“Don’t, Grazi. Today of all days, I can’t do this.”
Do what?Instead of asking the question, I bit my tongue and leant down to kiss his cheek.
“I have to return home.” Delfina was covering my absence the best way she could, by saying I was in poor health and keepingBabbo’sglass filled with bourbon in hopes that it would keep him too distracted to ask for me, but soon, Palermo would wake up and when it does, the news would spread. The entire island will know Adrian Fiori has closed his eyes forever and when that would happen, I had to be home.
“I fucking hate this.” Salvatore growled and jumped up, knocking me back with his shoulder.
Without a warning, he walked to the closest wall and smashed his face in it. It was a lost fight, the wall didn’t move, but my heart broke and filled my chest with blood. Salvatore was still standing, but inside he was kneeled by everything happening around him.
I walked to him on the tips of my feet. When my hand touched his back, I could feel the angry ripples of his muscles.
“Sasa.” I whimpered, silently begging to have the power to take his pain upon myself.
