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“Why did you do it?” she asks.
The hum of the heater starting up echoes around the house.
Her brows scrunch. “Did you do it because you felt bad for me?”
“No,” I blurt out.
“Then, why?”
“Because Ilikedyou.”
Her eyes widen. “Since when?”
“I’m not sure when it started,” I lie.
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Risk-averse, remember?”
She gives her head a good shake, although it doesn’t wipe the disbelief from her face. “If I hadn’t kissed you during that Stanford Halloween party, would you have made a move?”
“I had no idea what I wanted back then.”
Her brows crinkle with confusion. “But you liked me.”
“Yes.”
“Then why did you push me away when your dad died?”
“A few misguided reasons, but mainly because I was too proud to deal with my grief in the way I should have.”
Her mouth drops open.
“I took on way too much all at once, thinking if I fixed the struggling business or helped my mom through her depression, my own pain would go away.”
Her bottom lip trembles. “And you couldn’t do that if I was distracting you.”
“I should have never called you that.”
She reaches for my hand and gives it a squeeze. “I’m sorry for not seeing your actions for what they were.”
I rapidly blink. “What?”
I’mthe one who hurt her.
I’mthe one who drove her into the arms of another man, who ended up breaking her heart.
AndI’mthe one who took ten years to apologize, solely because I was a coward who didn’t want to face my fears, instead choosing to let my insecurities about my worth dictate my actions.
“Despite being hurt by all the things you said, I should have put my feelings aside and stepped up to be the bigger person. Because even though you pushed me away, I was the one who made a conscious choice to let it stay that way.”
My lungs ache. “None of this was your fault.”
“The same can be said about you.”
“Let’s agree to put the past behind us?”
“Deal.”
