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Twilight is all around us and the Earth is quiet. All I can hear is the echo of my own heart. I stand up from the ground and I take her hand, leading her along as I walk to clear my cluttered mind. I have already started this. I know I must finish it. Every second she is becoming more disheartened.
My head is a mess, filled with thoughts of the future, regrets from the past, and the fear that she won't be able to separate the two.
She glances at me with a cumbersome look upon her face, but refrains from asking me what's wrong. Before I have completely discouraged all hope for the moment, I take a deep breath and stop as I turn to face her. The look in her eyes is one of fear and confusion but there is still a little hope as well.
"I'm sorry for being so distracted. I have something on my mind recently and I have not been able to think of anything else."
"What is it?" she asks, her voice slightly trembling. "Is everything okay?"
"There is something I must tell you," I say as I take her hand in mine, my voice sounding a bit nervous, a bit breathless.
She nods in acknowledgement and turns towards me with a slight smirk on her face, looking at my expectant eyes as she waits for me to continue. My heart skips a beat as I find the words in my mind; words that I've rehearsed hundreds upon hundreds of times when I thought about telling her about my feelings for her, about how I felt about her. But there was never the perfect time for them to come out, and now, with only seconds between us, it's becoming harder and harder for me to find the right opportunity. I am finding that I have never feared anything more in my life than the thought of losing her. And, well, it might just have something to do with this moment.
I take one last deep breath before continuing, "I have been trying to think of the right way to say this and it's been hard to find the right words. Nothing I have come up with ever sounds right, but I can't wait any longer. It's about... about how I feel about you."
Her expression immediately softens into surprise, but there is a smile playing on her lips. "How do you feel?" She whispers. Her gaze doesn't leave mine and for some reason this makes me a little less anxious. The tension starts melting away from me and I manage a small chuckle as I look at our hands locked together. Nothing has ever looked or felt so natural to me.
I inhale deeply and gather my thoughts, ready to confess my love for her. "The truth is...I am in love with you, Diane. You are my soulmate. You are what has been missing in my life. I don't ever want to live my life without you in it." The words sound so much more romantic when said aloud and, if anything, I'm getting even more nervous by the second. It feels like we're the only ones in this world except for us.
She smiles slightly and says nothing, her gaze focused solely on me. I can see tears forming in the corners of her eyes but it doesn't distract me from my declaration any longer.
"I don't ever want to be without you. I need you in my life. I want you to be my wife. You don't have to answer right now. I don't want to rush you. We have all the time in the world. I just want to make you happy." I reach up and wipe one of her tears away, then the other, until the tear that has been rolling down her cheek finally falls. My fingers still gently hold hers against her own will but I'm careful not to let go.
I hold my breath as I wait for her response. My heart feels like it is about to jump out of my chest. She smiles slightly and says nothing, her gaze focused solely on me. I can see tears forming in the corners of her eyes but it doesn't distract me from my declaration any longer. There is so much I have wanted to tell her. I've been waiting for so long.
"I'm just so happy that you are a part of my life. You have changed my whole world. You have changed me. I am a better man with you by my side. Please consider my proposal. Let me spend my life making you as happy as you have made me."
Still, she remains silent and I start to worry that I may not be what she wants. My stomach is knots and there's a pain in my chest as I wait for her to speak. Her silence is torture but she does not relent. That is, until she leans down and kisses me.
Her lips are soft against mine and taste sweeter than honey. The kiss is short, sweet, and everything I ever imagined kissing her would be. A warm feeling envelopes my body and I feel every part of me tingle.
"Are you sure about this?" she asks. Her brows meet over her nose and she gives me an uncertain frown that I return with a smile.
"Very. I want to marry you, Diane." A grin spreads across my face and I bring one hand up to cup her cheek. "Is that okay with you? I have already sent a letter to the king abdicating the throne. It means nothing to me. You are all that matters. I have asked for his permission to marry my mate." I gently stroke her cheekbone with my thumb as I watch her eyes grow impossibly bigger.
Diane brings her hands up to clutch my face. She lets out a laugh that sounds close to hysterical and presses herself against me. "Yes," she says. And then she kisses me again, hard and messy. When she pulls back after several moments, there are tears streaming down her cheeks.
"You're crying," I say softly, a confused frown furrowing my forehead. "What's wrong?"
Diane reaches up and takes one of my hands from her cheek, bringing it to her lips to kiss it. "Nothing is wrong. Nothing could make me happier than to become your wife, Carmichael. I want that as much as you do. I have loved you from the moment you saved me. My heart is yours, just as it has always been. I knew you would be the one I'd spend my life with. Even when you were rough, I saw the real you. I saw who you were, hidden beneath the surface. I hoped that one day you would be here with me again and I am happy that you are."
"I feared that you might hate me after everything I've done. I wouldn't blame you if you did," I admitted as a wave of relief swept over me.
"I did try to hate, I'm sorry to say. At times I wanted nothing else, but something always stopped me from feeling such things. My heart just wouldn't allow me to hate you. I saw how kind and how gentle you could be. I knew in my heart that was the real you. There were moments that I feared I may never see that part of you again, but I never gave up hope."
With a bright smile on my face, I pull Diane closer to me and give her another quick kiss. Then I lift myself off the ground and hold out my hand to help her to her feet.
"Where do you think you're taking me?" She laughs quietly as she stands next to me and takes my offered hand.
"Well, since you asked so nicely," I reply and give her hand a gentle squeeze. Then I spin her around on the grass so that we're facing each other. I lean in and whisper, "To get married."
And then I press my lips against hers once again. I pull back far enough to ask, "Do you believe me?"
A grin spreads across her face as she looks down at me and she shakes her head. "No," she replies and kisses me once more. "But I will follow you anyway. I will never leave your side. It is where I belong and where I will stay."
Then she cups my face once more, pulling me even closer to her so that we're chest to chest. Our arms wrap tightly around each other, and I can almost hear her pulse beating beneath my ear. Her breathing grows shallow as I lean into her, feeling a sense of satisfaction knowing that I managed to make her happy.
After what seems like an eternity, we break apart. I rest my head against hers for just a moment, enjoying the feeling of holding her body against mine before pulling away. She giggles a little and wipes her eyes free of her tears, which had long ago dried.
