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I can finally think again later, though I do not know how much time has passed. The myriad of emotions I feel makes me sick. Trinity has condemned me to a slow death, yes, but Warren and his supposed never-ending hope have also abandoned me.
He’d be angry if I said that, telling me that I have abandoned him instead of the other way around, but how am I supposed to have hope when it is impossible to think about what good can come out of this?
I am lost, my mother is gone, and Peliel will either hate me or abandon me. Two options that will leave me with the same outcome, wanting to die.
“Perhaps he won’t do either of those things,”I can hear Warren say. His voice is deep, soothing like a blanket that can protect me against even the coldest of nights and the harshest of sandstorms. This time I do not think it’s enough.“He could just be worried and want you back.”
Am I that lucky of a person that that is a possibility? And if I were, why am I still facing trials as cruel as these?
A hand caresses my cheek, or at least, I think one does. I’m so lost in my own despair I don’t know anymore. It lifts my chin and turns it to the side where I see a dark, imposing structure in the distance.
A cave?
“Yes,”Warren says, or at least I think he does. He’s smug, I can hear the smile in his voice.“Not all is lost.”
“It could be,” I whisper. Do I risk another tragedy? “That could be fake.”
“It’s not, have hope.”
“What a horrible thing it is, this hope,” I mutter. “How useless.”
“How powerful.”
Sand digs into my skin like spikes, and my skin is as hot and red as the sun. I really don’t have a choice, even if I doubt what I see in front of me. Tlouz has never been merciful even toward the most miserable of its victims. Soon I will develop burns so hot that they can send me into shock, and I have no water nor cover for when the night arrives.
Either I go toward this cave with this nefarious hope in my chest and find a place to rest for the night or die. The choice is a lot simpler to make than I thought it would be. Warren protect me.
I stand. My knees ache, nearly giving out underneath the pain, but I attempt to stand tall. Throwing an arm over my eyes to try and give them some cover, I squint at the structure in the distance. If it is truly there, it won’t take more than an hour or so to walk, so at least I will be able to find out if this is the work of Warren or Trinity soon.
With one foot in front of the other, I walk and try not to think of my body roasting out here in the sun before it is picked clean by predators.
“Please be kind to me,” I whisper toward Warren. He does not respond.
As I walk and walk and walk, the structure does seem to be getting larger and clearer. Details manifest themselves, and I can see a cave opening. Could today end with one good thing? I hope so, I really do.
I push my body to what feels like its limits. My skin is tight across my body, and I feel lightheaded. My mouth tastes like sand, and I don’t have the luxury of swallowing my own saliva to provide even the smallest of relief to my throat anymore.
But it’s okay.
“It’s real,” I say with wonder. “I’m saved.”
The cave opening isn’t very large, but it's dark and shielded from the sun’s rays. It will make for a good shelter, and if I last through the night, I might be able to make my way back to Peliel and beg for forgiveness.
When I approach the entrance, I realize my mistake too late.
Angry, starving growls erupt from the darkness, and I see eyes glowing bright white. Trinity giggles in my ear, or so I think, and Warren moans in despair.
Hope is such a deadly thing.
I turn on my heel and begin to run, not even sparing a second to see what kind of creatures will kill me.
I’m going to die here, alone, just like I always was going to.
I look up at the sky when the snarls grow closer. The sun, though deadly in its own right, is a familiar presence. Perhaps it will give me comfort in my last moments. When I rake my eyes across the sky, though, I see a bright light heading towards me at incredible speeds. A shooting star? In the daytime?
The realization hits me like a boulder. It’s Peliel.
Has he come to kill me? Hurt me for hurting him? Perhaps it will be a mercy…
