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“Nope,” I said, emphasizing thepsound.
“He’s still a male.” Jewel sounded bored with her own pronouncement.
“You like men just fine as long as they’re short-term,” Piper told her.
“I don’t like men when they crush my bestie’s heart.”
My attempt at a laugh came out shaky. “Me neither.”
“So…what are you going to do? You can’t keep working for Knox, can you?” Piper asked.
Closing my eyes tight against the physical pain the question caused in my chest, I tried to imagine living at Knox’s again, caring for Juniper but not sleeping in his bed.Justbeing the nanny. Loving on his daughter. Avoiding him on my days off.
There was no way I could go back to how it had been, to the sex, the sleeping together, the waking up together.
We’d fallen into it before, and stupid me, even after he’d said we were a secret, even with all the ways he made it clear I was just convenient, a part of me had dared to believe it could go somewhere. Dared to believe my heart could get it right for once.
That wasmyproblem though. He hadn’t led me on, had never made promises he couldn’t keep. He’d been honest from the get-go. I’d just been wearing blinders.
They were off now.
“If he needs help, I can take care of June until he finds someone else. He has to find someone else fast though.”
Jewel hopped down from the counter and wrapped her arms around me, pulled me into her. “I’m so sorry, sweetie.”
With a watery laugh that sounded more like despair, I said, “You warned me. I should’ve listened.”
As Piper closed in and joined the hug, Jewel said, “You can’t help what you feel. I was just afraid you weregoingto feel.”
“And you were right.” I swallowed around the gob of emotion in my throat.
“Dammit,” she said with a caring smile.
Piper gestured to Taylor to join us, and she did.
“Will you go back to Henry’s?” Taylor asked.
“My job there’s supposed to be waiting for me,” I said. “But no.” We stood there with our four foreheads pressed together, arms around each other, as I worked up my courage to say the next bit out loud for the first time. “I’m going to look for another nanny position.”
“I love it,” Piper said.
“That’s a solid plan,” Taylor said.
“It feels right.” I sniffled. “Righter than teaching or Henry’s or anything else.”
Jewel was noticeably quiet. I straightened and eyed her.
“What?” I asked.
“You’ll be a rad nanny.” She looked me in the eye as a partial smile tugged at her lips.
“I hear a but.”
“Same thing as before. You care too much. You’ll want to make your nanny family your own. I worry you’ll get hurt again.”
“You’re sweet,” I said with another sniff.
“I’m not sweet,” she huffed. “I’m practical. Another couple of heartbreaks like this and we’ll need a lot of red wine.”
