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My breathing picks up, and I realize I just fucking cheated on my girl.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
I quickly grab my phone; a picture of us together smiling at the lake pops up, and I swallow hard before I try calling her again, but again, she doesn't answer. My guilt increases. She's struggling with her parent's betrayal, and instead of understanding, I fucking used her distance as an excuse to fucking cheat.
Oh fuck, fuck, fuck, no, what did I just fucking do?
I stand up from my chair, pushing it away as I feel sick, sweat building on my forehead.
I'm mid-freaking out, feeling like a heavy weight is sitting on my chest when there's a knock on my door, and Axel walks in.
He looks at me and furrows his brows. "What's up, brother? You look like you're about to pass out."
I clear my throat and shake my head before I rasp.
"I just fucking let Clitter suck me off."
He stills, his eyes widening. "What the fuck?"
I start to pace, running my fingers through my hair, feeling guilty as fuck as panic sets in. "Fuck, I don't even know what the fuck I was thinking."
He scoffs, "Well, obviously you fucking weren't. She'll leave you, Dagger. She told you no other women, or she's out; that was her only rule for your relationship."
I shake my head. "No, no, she won't find out. I'll fucking make sure of it; she can't fucking find out. I can't fucking lose her brother; I need her. FUCK, WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST DO?"
Just as I said the words, my office door slammed open. Amy, aka 'Bubbles,' a sweet butt who didn't want to be a sweet butt but thought it was the only way to have our protection and tried ruining the Pres' relationship with Annalise, walks in, and she looks pissed.
I raise my eyebrows when she points at me.
"Did you seriously just fucking cheat on that sweet nurse?"
My eyes widen while Axel sucks in a breath, fuck. I go to talk, but she's not done reaming my ass yet.
"Are you some kind of fucking idiot? That woman looks at you like you hang the fucking moon; she's in love with you! and you go cheat on her with Clitter. Why? Because she needed some time after the big bomb, you dropped on her about her father. I hope your fucking dick rots off!"
Then she storms out of my office, slamming the door, while Axel and I look at it in shock. Just as Axel is about to speak, the door opens again. Amy points at me and says, "You should be fucking grateful I like Melanie. I told Clitter the next time she opens her fucking mouth about what happened in here, then I'll skin her alive." She slams the door again while we look at it with raised brows, fucking shocked.
"I preferred it when she wanted to keep us happy."
I nodded in agreement because fuck Bubbles was much less scary than Amy.
My phone pings and I quickly grab it but sigh when I see it's only Flame.
Flame - Let's roll, brother.
I look up to Axel and say, "I gotta go; Flame's become impatient since losing Star, and he's ready to roll out. I'll see you in two days."
He nods and pats my back. "It'll be ok, brother."
I just snorted and shook my head.
I don't see how, if someone doesn't tell Mel what I just fucking did, my guilt will rise every time I look into her beautiful eyes.
I get to my bike and fist-bump Flame before starting her up, and we all get into formation, ready to roll out. I quickly text my girl before placing my phone in my cut, and we leave the clubhouse grounds for Wincher.
My Heart – going out of town on a club run for two days. Call if you need me, Precious. I know you're struggling with everything, so let me help you through it; I miss you xxx
Chapter 14
