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When she places him back on my chest in a blanket, I instantly start tracing his features before they help me place him at my breast to nurse him. He latches on nicely, and I must admit, it stings a little at first.
"6 lb 10 oz, a healthy baby boy. Do we have a name for him?"
I don't look up from my baby as I run my hands over his head. "Theodore Mathew Silvers after his two grandfathers. Theo for short."
I gave Tank, Zayne's dad, the honor of having the first name while my father has the second; I knew that's what Zayne would have wanted, and Theo is also Zayne's middle name.
The nurses finish their checks before I'm left alone, and another sob breaks free as I gently rock my boy. "I'm sorry your daddy's not h-here."
I sniffle as my phone rings. I debated ignoring it, but I can't. I need to speak to him. I need him, and I don't care how stupid that makes me. I pick up my phone but instantly frown upon seeing Gunner's name. He never calls me.
I quickly answered it, panicking and lacing my voice.
"Gunner?"
"Starfish… I fucked up."
I suck in a breath, hearing the emotions in his voice as he sniffled, and I whispered, "What happened?"
"Leah, she, fuck Star. We got it all wrong, so fucking wrong."
He sobs, and my heart stops.
"Lucas, tell me what happened with Leah." I use his given name, hoping he'll talk to me.
He sniffles again. "Razor, he-he fuck, he lied Star; he and Leah were never an item; she never cheated on him; it was all a fucking ploy, so Cara got to keep me."
Anger overrides me, making Theo murmur a little, so I tap his bottom. "She played you with his help?"
"Worse Star, so much fucking worse. Leah's foster dad sold her virginity to Razor when he took an interest in her before we met and before she applied for the job at the bar."
No, no, no, no.
"Lucas, please tell me he didn't, not where I was..." I can't finish the sentence. I couldn't, please; she wasn't, not where I was, notby a man I knew was a traitor. "He tore through her innocence with a razor in between his fingers the day of her interview, right outside the front door of the bar."
I gasped out a cry.
"He never fucked her; he basically wanted what he saw as his when he realized we had a connection and that I was going to make her mine. He left permanent damage inside her. She was told she may never be able to get pregnant." I shake my head, gasping out "no" as Theo murmurs again while he continues, "But we beat the odds, me and her. We were drunk, which is probably the only reason she even let me touch her. Her notes from the hospital go into detail on her trauma with penetration, but it happened; I had her-her; I got her pregnant against the odds; I didn't fucking r-remember it." He clears his throat as I look down at my son. "There's a large chance I could lose both her and the baby before she even gives birth; she could die because of the trauma he caused her body." God no, I let out another cry in shock, tears spilling down my cheeks. "F-for years, Star, I have been fucking Cara for years, t-throwing it in her-her face."
I shake my head and sniffle. "You didn't know Lucas; surely she can't hold that against you?"
"Star, I saw them. She and Razor; Cara told me they were a couple, knowing I'd go and want to see it with my own eyes, I saw her riffling against him, but-but I thought, I thought…”
Oh god no, "you thought he was getting her off, not tearing her insides up."
He sniffles again. "We all treated her badly, Star, except for Doc and Ava. They see her as a daughter; they're the only reason why we know the truth; she never told anyone, and with how we were treating her, Doc couldn't sit back any longer and risked his license." I sucked in a breath. He loves his job helpingpeople; "he risked his license for someone who's a daughter to him to open our eyes to how badly we were treating her, how I was treating her, the woman I love more than anything. I was pushing her away out of loyalty to someone we never even questioned."
"Oh, Lucas." I try to wipe my tears.
"I don't know what to do, Star. She's pulling away from everyone, including Sophie, and she's like a sister to her. I made her move in with me, and I got her to work back at the bar, but if given the chance, Star."
I swallow hard. "She'll follow in my footsteps and run." Crap. I take a deep breath. "Leave it with me, Lucas; I'll figure something out." He sniffles again. "I promise you, I'll figure something out."
"Star?"
I look up and smile at the nurse before talking to Gunner again. "That's Wendy, my boss, my breakover. Leave it with me. Lucas, ok, I love you." I hear him rasp, "I love you too, Starfish," before I hang up and look up to the nurse as she smiles at me.
"You are ready to be discharged."
