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Kim agreed that it might be guilt of some kind, she just wasn’t sure which one.
‘Tell me about their friendship,’ she said.
‘Inseparable since the first day of school. Best buddies but so different. Josh was such a quiet, studious boy. Brad was outgoing, full of life, rebellious. They balanced each other out. Brad never thought things through; he acted impulsively most of the time. He rarely saw consequences to his actions.
‘Don’t get me wrong, he wasn’t a bad child, quite the opposite, but he didn’t follow convention; he didn’t like rules. I remember when he was maybe twelve and he was in a biology lesson. The teacher wanted them all to cut worms in half to show the difference between cutting off the head end or the tail end.
‘Brad refused, asking to see the consent form signed by the worm. The teacher threatened him with detention, suspension, but he wouldn’t budge. Most of the class followed his example so there was little the teacher could do. He was his own person and could not be swayed.’
‘Not even by you?’
Rose shook her head. ‘I like to think we were close, but I suppose I always felt like I loved him more, if that makes sense.’
Kim said nothing and waited for her to continue.
‘It’s hard to explain but I’ll do my best. Punishing Brad was hard to do even from a very early age. There was nothing he was attached to enough for it to matter. I remember once telling him to clean his room. I threatened him with grounding, game console ban, the lot. It made no difference – he wouldn’t do it because he didn’t care enough about the things I was threatening to take away. Other times I’d get back from work and he’d be building a hedgehog refuge in the back garden. He was a good kid; intelligent but headstrong.’
‘You don’t feel he was attached to you?’
Rose thought before answering. ‘He loved me, I know that, but he didn’t need me. I often felt that he didn’t need anyone. It was the same with Josh. They were definitely best friends, but it was more for the effort that Josh put in. Brad always went out with Josh when Josh came, but it was always Josh coming if you know what I mean.’
‘And what if he hadn’t?’ Kim asked, beginning to understand their dynamic a little more.
‘I’ve thought about that a lot and I honestly don’t know. Most of me thinks Brad would have been perfectly content in his own company.’
‘Was Josh ever resentful?’
‘Of what?’
‘Brad not being as forthcoming as he was. Surely friendship is a two-way thing?’
‘I don’t think so. I never thought about it. Josh was a good lad – kind, thoughtful and well-mannered. He was like a second son to me but he was also very loyal to Brad. I remember one time Brad forgot my birthday. Josh came for tea and saw my cards on the fireplace. Next day there was a small bunch of flowers with an apology note signed from Brad, except that it was Josh’s handwriting. He denied it emphatically, insisting they were from Brad. He did that a lot, covered for his best friend. Even the morning Brad was abducted he was making excuses for him.’
‘What happened?’ Kim asked.
Rose’s expression saddened. ‘We were having a row, about his chemistry exam of all things. It was the first of his mock tests in a few days and he hadn’t done even an hour of study. He hated tests or exams of any kind even though he normally did well. He insisted that he didn’t need to study and we had words, harsh words. We were shouting at each other when Josh knocked the door. Brad stormed upstairs, and Josh put his arm round me and told me Brad didn’t mean it and that he’d be fine later.’
A small sob escaped from the woman. ‘But of course there was no later. My last words to my son were shouted in anger and that’s something I’ve had to learn to live with.’ She swallowed. ‘But Josh is a good boy, and I know Brad thought a lot of him too, in his own way.’
Kim couldn’t imagine the pain of knowing she could never take those harsh words back; but her love for her son appeared to have been transferred to deep affection for his best friend.
‘Clearly you’re fond of him, and I didn’t mean to upset him. We’re just trying to iron out a couple of inconsistent details about the day Brad was abducted.’
‘Like what?’ she asked.
‘Nothing major that affects the loss of your son. We’ll try not to bother Josh again.’
‘I appreciate it,’ Rose said, standing.
‘How are the other ladies?’ Kim asked, opening the door back into the corridor.
‘No idea. Yoga class is on a break and Catherine shut down the WhatsApp group. I saw her at Sainsbury’s a few days ago and she walked straight past me.’
Kim wondered if Catherine had so many friends that she could afford to offload them all so easily.
Kim walked the woman to the door and bid her goodnight.
If Rose’s visit had been intended to quell her interest in Josh and his friendship with Brad, it had actually had the opposite effect.
