Page 45 of You're so Basic


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Of us all, Burke was the shiniest prize, but he’s been tainted by his parents, Lucas and Melinda Burke, who are going on trial this spring for covering up their shitty business practices. Burke’s the one who turned them in, because Burke is an all-around stand-up guy.

Leonard is what Shane calls an “alleged former criminal.” Meaning hewasa criminal, back when he was younger, having been raised to break the law from early childhood, but he didn’t get caught for most of the things he did.

And then there’s me…guilty because of what I can do with my computer.

* * *

Shaneand I park in front of the building, and for a second I just look up at it. It’s part of a brick apartment complex in West Asheville, with plenty of parking around the buildings for residents and dirty signs advertising two swimming pools that won’t be of use to anyone until May. There are a bunch of trees around us, the leaves that are still on them red and gold and faded green.

“You know,” Shane says, then pauses for a few seconds, likely to build anticipation for his next words. It’s a tactic designed for courtrooms, but I’m guessing he realizes it works just as well in daily life—for pissing people off.

“I know a lot of things,” I say absently, my attention on the front door. “I also don’t know a lot of things. I think that's probably true of most people.”

“Very funny.” He rolls his eyes, but he’s snapped out of it a little—he’s more Shane and less the suited lawyer.

“So what hallowed knowledge do you have for me this time?” I ask, glancing at him.

“It occurs to me that you’re acting like a jealous boyfriend, showing up here. He might—”

“I’m not,” I blurt. Shit, judging from the look of cunning in his eyes, I just gave him the kind of tell he’s always looking for.

“Oh?”

“Oh. I’m just trying to be a friend. I can’t be at the apartment all the time. I don’t like the thought of him showing up there if I’m not around.”

His raised eyebrows argue that I am always at the apartment—or almost always.

“I still go on my bike rides,” I argue. “And to see Ruthie.”

He angles his head. “How’s my favorite hellcat doing?”

I shrug. “I haven’t heard from her much lately. Which makes me think she’sdefinitelywrapped up in one of her schemes. She never tells me beforehand.”

He huffs laughter. “Yeah, because if she told us, we’d try to persuade her not to do it.”

As if she’d tell him. Honestly, he’s probably the reason she doesn’t tell me—she knows he’d make fun of what she’s doing. She doesn’t care what most people think, but Shane has a special ability to scrape her nerves raw.

I’m proud of my sister’s hustle, but it’s hard to watch her burn through the money she makes at the diner on one of her money-making schemes. Growing up, our mother was always hawking some new MLM scheme—Tupperware, essential oils, bad makeup, that kind of junk—but Ruthie’s more enterprising. She’s got an old camper van called Vanny she keeps trying to turn into a mobile business—a pet clothes boutique, a store selling only unicorn toys and, for a hot minute, she thought about having it outfitted into a food truck before realizing how much money she’d have to spend on the required licenses. I help her as much as she’ll allow, but sometimes I worry she’s going to burn herself out. Between raising Izzy, her morning and lunch shifts at the diner, and her various business attempts, she’s always taking on too much. But she acts as if the world will stop turning if she ever stops.

Maybe that’s why Mira reminds me a little of her—because Mira’s clearly having trouble in the liminal space she’s in.

I feel privileged to be there with her.

Shane’s looking at me expectantly, like he wants me to laugh with him. But my nerves are burned raw, and my wrist hurts like hell, and I’m confused on an almost cosmic level.

“Let’s get this over with,” I say.

“Tell me what’s going on with Mira first.”

I’d dared to hope he’d forgotten about his question.

“No,” I say flatly.

He lifts his palms out. “Fine. I’m not going to ask what’s going on with you and the hot bartender. I know you’re still caught up in the whole Daphne thing, so I’m guessing you just want to bang her the same way you probably want to bang half the women you meet since becoming a monk. Although I still say you’d be better off entering the pact with me.”

I’m pissed off by his condescension, and even more so by his attitude toward Mira. He’s also dead wrong. I’m definitelynot“caught up in the whole Daphne thing,” and I don’t want to bang half the women I meet. Then again, Shane isn’t equipped to understand that. He thinks relationships are good for one thing—sex—and it’s impossible to convince him otherwise.

But I don’t feel like getting into an old argument, and I haven’t forgotten he’s here to help.

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