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“Library of books,” she said, wagging a finger at him. “What did you think I was going to say?”
James flushed a brilliant red. “Thank you for that, my love. As if I’m not awkward enough as it is.”
“I think you’re wonderful,” she said softly. She leaned forward to set her mug down, then rested her arm on the back of the chair and laid her chin on her hand. She seemed so normal, and he couldn’t help but envy the love Remi must have grown up with. “The truth is, this isn’t an easy life. Not for ones brought in and not for the ones born to it. But we take strength in each other. I only wish my son would understand that.”
“I think he does,” Jeremiah said, wishing he could keep it in, but he couldn’t help it. So much of him ached for Remi, and it was terrifying. “I think he’s afraid, but he’s going to do amazing things. He’ll be a fantastic king.”
“If he wants to be,” Grace said with a small, knowing smile Jeremiah couldn’t hope to understand. “But I hope you give yourself credit.”
Jeremiah jolted. “For what?”
“Bringing out a side of him he’s been hiding for a long time. I know you two might seem like oil and water, but I’ve been around for a long time, and I know better.” When Grace reached for him, Jeremiah couldn’t bring himself to pull away. Her hand was almost painfully cold against his perpetually hot skin, but he didn’t hate her touch. “I don’t know what has you wandering the halls after midnight, but I hope you know how grateful we are that you’re here.”
Even if I kissed your son? Even if I put him in danger because I was so caught up in him?
But as much as he’d resolved to tell them the truth so they’d force him out, he couldn’t bring himself to say it aloud. He’d never had parents before, and the way they were with him—near him like they wanted to be, like they didn’t care that he was an abomination—it was too addictive, and he wasn’t ready to let go.
“I should leave you two and get to bed,” he finally managed, extracting himself from her fingers and standing.
The pair exchanged a look, and then James climbed to his feet. “Let me walk you back.”
Jeremiah wanted to say that wasn’t necessary, but he was still craving the company, so he didn’t put up a fight when the king matched his pace and they started down the corridor. Silence settled between them, comforting and easy in a strange way, and Jeremiah almost regretted it when James took a breath.
“There are days I still don’t feel like I belong. The weight of hatred is sometimes too much to bear, and I don’t know that Remi will want to live with that for the rest of his life. I think he’s afraid if he decides to turn down the throne, we’ll be disappointed in him.”
“Have you told him you won’t be?”
James scoffed. “More times than I can count, but you know how kids are with their parents.”
“I don’t,” Jeremiah admitted. “I never knew mine. I was abandoned as a child. Hellhounds around here don’t usually keep their children.”
James’s eyes darkened with sadness. “I regret that your parents didn’t get to know how you turned out.”
Jeremiah could only think of a dozen self-deprecating things, so he said nothing at all.
“I just wanted you to know that whatever Remi chooses, we will always support him. And for however long you stick around, we’re glad to have you.” James clasped his shoulder and squeezed with more strength than Jeremiah was expecting.
Before he could say anything, James turned and disappeared around the corner, leaving Jeremiah more confused than when he’d left his room, determined to burn this job to the ground.
What the hell had been in that cocoa?
11
REMI
Remi stopped outside the gym and listened to the steady beat of fists hitting leather.
For the first time since the attack on the beach, he had gone an entire day without seeing Jeremiah. Even when he’d been outside swimming in the pool, there had been no sign of the Hellhound, just a half dozen palace guards.
The fact that Jeremiah was obviously avoiding him had soured his mood. Having a man kiss him and then run away had been bad enough, but then to not see him at all when it was his damn job to keep Remi safe?
Ridiculous.
He’d seen the handsome Vampire from Jeremiah’s team stop by about an hour after their… interaction the night before, and he’d thought for sure the man was going to be swapping in for Jeremiah as the head of his detail.
But he’d found out the following morning that the Vampire had left almost as soon as he had arrived. He kept expecting to see Jeremiah at some point or to at least feel him just outside of his line of sight, hiding in a hallway or in the bushes when he was outside. But that strange pulsing sensation to let him know when the Hellhound was near hadn’t triggered at all, not until just a moment ago as he’d neared the gym. He had spent most of the day trying to decide what he would say once he did see Jeremiah again. As much as he’d told himself that he wasn’t upset about the aborted kiss, he knew that was a lie. Watching Jeremiah literally flee the room after kissing him had left his chest feeling flayed open, vulnerable. His whole body ached in a way he wasn’t familiar with.
It wasn’t like he’d never been rejected before. At school, most people didn’t know who he was. If he went out to a club or to a party, he was just another guy. Hell, Oz—his one semi-serious boyfriend—had dumped him spectacularly when Remi had suggested they have sex.
