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I squeezed my eyes closed, hating the thought that popped into my brain, but only because I knew I should have. If I would have disappeared like I’d wanted to, then I wouldn’t be here right now.
Letting out a breath, I opened my eyes, my gaze landing on the window as I watched the trees pass by on the country road we were driving down. Then all of a sudden, we were slowing down, pulling into a random gas station in the middle of nowhere.
My stomach rolled, a shiver passing through me at the car that was parked in the parking lot, along with the man leaning against the hood, his dark eyes focused in on us.
He’d stayed away, allowing Ace to retrieve me from my hiding place, but I should have known he wouldn’t be far away.
Ace grasped my hand as we pulled to a stop, bringing my attention to him. And as soon as our gazes connected, he murmured, “I love you, P, please remember that, okay?”
A lump formed in my throat, his words sounding so true that I couldn’t deny them, no matter how much I wanted to in that moment. But there was still a voice in the back of my mind refusing to believe his words, because if he really loved me, then why couldn’t he see that Travis was lying? Why had he so easily dismissed the little information I’d started to give him.
Maybe this should have been my moment to confess it all to him, but what would be the point? It would only make me look worse than I already did.
So instead of saying anything back, I shuttered off my emotions and let myself out of the SUV, telling anyone who was listening, “I need to use the restroom.”
If it had been just me and Travis, I never would have been able to walk into the store and request the key to the bathrooms. But Ace was there too, pushing himself out of the SUV, then making his way over to Travis. My gaze was glued to them as I moved to the restrooms, the cool key gripped in my hand. They were in deep conversation, their attention moving from me to the SUV we’d come in, then to each other. They were clearly planning what would happen next.
Letting out a breath as I entered the restroom just as the second SUV that had been following us pulled onto the lot. I locked the door behind me, needing just a few minutes. I had to process everything that had happened from the moment Ace had knocked on my door, but that was easier said than done. My brain was like a bowl full of noodles, thoughts running into other thoughts, never ending but then also cutting off randomly.
I shook my head, trying to dispel them as I used the restroom, then washed up. Bending down a little, my attention landed on my chest and under my tank top, a glint shining—my cell, I still had my cell. Or, I should say, the burner cell that Rafael had gotten me. My main cell was still sitting in the microwave back home.
Home. It would never be home to us again.
I’d worn my favorite shorts, the problem was, the pockets on them were fake, so I had nowhere to put my cell. So I did what any woman did when they needed to store something on themselves, I pushed it down my bra. Which is why it had probably gone unnoticed.
My hands shook, excitement mixed with terror bubbling up as knocks hit the door, followed by Ace demanding, “Hurry up, P.”
“Just a minute!” I called, fishing the cell out and glancing at the screen. I had no notifications, at least, not any that meant anything. Part of me was hoping Raf would have messaged, or called, or…something.
My breath left my body in a whoosh at the memory of his face just an hour ago. I had no idea what they’d told him, what story they were using, but I needed him to know…
I blinked, my gaze on the door as I walked toward it but then rested my back on it. It wouldn’t stop anyone from coming inside, but my brain felt more at ease standing there. My thumb tapped on the messages icon, bringing up his name immediately. I wasn’t sure what to write, what to say, so…I just rambled on, but by the time I clicked send, it was everything he needed to know, everything I needed to say.
Reading over it one last time, I committed the words to memory…
Peyton
Raf, I don’t even know where to start this. I don’t know what you’ve been told but just know that everything I said to you was the truth. You were there for me when no one else was. You made me feel safe again. You gave me a freedom I didn’t know I deserved. I know things are different now and that I’ll never be able to see you again, but I need to tell you the truth. When I think about you, I smile. When I remember the way you held me, I feel at peace. When I think about the way you would look at me, I know that all of those feelings swirling around that I tried to deny were real. I love you, Raf. I love you with my whole heart and soul. We just weren’t meant to be. It wasn’t in the cards for us. But that doesn’t make it not true. If there’s one thing you’ll remember about me, please remember that I loved you.
Tears sprung to my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. I couldn’t, not right then, because there was no telling when they would stop. And outside of this door, there were men who didn’t care about me in the same way Raf did. They didn’t listen to me. They didn’t care how I felt. They just wanted to manipulate everyone and play a game that I wasn’t even aware existed.
“P!” Ace shouted again.
“Coming.” I powered off my cell, not knowing if I’d be able to keep it hidden or not, but I’d try my damn hardest to. It was my lifeline, the backup that I’d needed so much over the years but never gotten. Travis knew all of the calls and messages coming in from the cell that he had provided me with. Although, he removed it more than I had it in possession. Yet another one of his punishments.
Pushing the cell back in my bra, I moved some hair out of my face, and exited the restroom, handing the key to Ace, then heading back toward the SUV but then— “Where’s the SUV?” I asked, panic rising inside of me so fast that it had my head spinning.
“Headed to my place,” Ace said.
Turning, I stared directly at my big brother, his face shuttered of any emotions. “The boys?” I croaked out.
“In the SUV.” Did that mean I was going to Ace’s? If I was, then why was Travis here and— “You and Travis need a little time,” Ace continued. “So I’m gonna have the boys for a couple of weeks.” He stepped forward, a frown appearing as I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to seek the comfort I so desperately needed in that moment. “It’s just until you get better, P.”
“Get better?” I choked out, not believing what he was saying. “There’s nothing wrong with me to getbetter.”
He cracked his neck to the side, a move that Raf did so often. I missed him already. Not just because he offered a sense of security, but because…because I just missed him.
“Peyton.” The way he said my name like I’d just been caught sneaking in through my bedroom window…I hated it. And in that moment, I hated him. “Let’s not do this.”
